2007-12-28 16:19:41 · 36 answers · asked by BreeAnn 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If it effects the way you interact with your children and your wellbeing in a negative way, then no. If it is an abusive (in any way) relationship, if he treats you bad in front of the kids- it's time to go. I've been thinking about staying with my husband even though he lies and cheats, for the kids, but when it begins to affect my health and my personality (are you stressed, snappy, irritable, crying at different times) and it has a little, I have to go. Better the kids to see a happy healthy mother than a mother and father in an unhappy relationship. Why do we as women have to sacrifice so much? is a question I ask myself often.
2007-12-28 17:08:04 · answer #1 · answered by kat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there's no abuse or neither one of you is having an affair, I'd try my best to work it out. A wise person once told me that getting a divorce only multiples the problems most times. The issues you are dealing with with your spouse will be the same issues you'll deal with with the next spouse. It's better to work them out the first time and make it work.
Another friend who had been divorced and remarried told me how difficult this all was for her children. She said she loved her new husband, but if she knew then what she knows now, she would never have left the first husband. If it's just that you're not happy......you really can't blame your spouse. He/she is not responsible for your happiness. Any marriage is hard work and takes a commitment from both parties to hold it together. It's not all fun. Sometimes you want to run away from it all, but other times it's worth every thing you've given to it. That's just life. If you were single you wouldn't always be happy either. Love isn't an emotion. It's a choice. You and your spouse, and your kids will be a stronger family if you get through this hard time.
2007-12-28 16:29:27 · answer #2 · answered by Woods 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
As Dr. Phil would say, "It is better for kids to come from a broken home than to live in one."
If there is no way that the two of you can work to fix the relationship, then move on, after you both have earned your way out of the marriage. Exhaust all efforts and then if leaving is necessary, leave. Whatever you choose will be hard, but you will heal.
Best of luck.
2007-12-28 16:45:17 · answer #3 · answered by renea_phd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids should never the reason to stay together. If your not happy then your not happy.
2007-12-28 16:25:35 · answer #4 · answered by Spring M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. If your not happy, your relationship will show it. Your kids will be screwed-up thinking your marriage is a good marriage. That's how they learn. You shouldn't throw your marriage away unless you have gotten therapy first. But if neither of you care anymore, the kids would be better off seeing you both happy with someone else.
2007-12-28 16:33:12 · answer #5 · answered by GoodGuy53 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely NOT! You are teaching your children what relationship is all about, what is love etc. If you give up on your life, they will think that being unhappy is acceptable, that love and well being is not important, besides if you are unhappy, you won't be there for your kids, since you are constantly depressed and your attention is on your own misery.
Life is short to waist Sweets, and you deserve to be happy and fight for yourself. it will be tough for your kids, but if you explain it well, and will be there for their greaving the end of your marriage, they will be ok.
There is also something called trying to make your marriage better for everyone. You did love this man, and had kids with him. I would suggest http://www.retrouvaille.org/
2007-12-28 16:59:25 · answer #6 · answered by Kitten 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No! you don't want your kids around that type of negativity around your kids. If your un-happy your kids will be un-happy. You want the best for kids and you want them to have a positive outlook on future relationships. You don't want them to grow up with a negative out look on the opposite sex. Good luck and I hope you make the right decision.
2007-12-28 16:29:52 · answer #7 · answered by Ms. Prissy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO. Staying in marriage just for the kid's sake will not work out well. If you are not happy, the kids could sense it and they will not be happy either. But if you love your children more than yourself, I think you can make more sacrifices for their sake and make your marriage work. You will be happy if you can make others happy.
2007-12-28 23:51:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as the following 3 things are not present you should stay together. Divorce is a terrible thing, and the children always suffer the most.
The 3 things are:
Abuse- physical, verbal and emotional.
Alcohol- any sign of problem drinking and you have to stop it.
Along with excessive drinking and the abuse of it comes
mental and sometimes verbal abuse.
Affairs- this speaks for itself. Lack of respect for everyone.
2007-12-28 16:38:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not think so. Your kids know when something is up. They also know when you are not happy. Nobody wins from this situation, especially you. The kids would rather live in a happy home than one where everyone is miserable.
2007-12-28 16:38:22 · answer #10 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋