My b/f has full costudy of all 4 of his kids. he has the right to tell her when and if she can have them and he also has the right to say if they can talk to her. Christmas eve she was soppose to bring them home and she didn't bring them home until christmas night. Well he call the cops and they couldn't do anything about it. Well tonight she starts to call about 7:30 pm and it didn't end until 8:40 pm almost 60 calls with thin that time. then she started again at 10:00 pm and it didn't stop until we got a knock on the door from the cops because she called them on us because we wouldn't let her talk to them because she is stupid. I just want to know if anyone thinks this is right for them to come for her and not for someone who is the real parent?
2007-12-28 16:08:30 · 9 answers · asked by love_me_not1982 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would have to know about the specific terms and legalities.
If he has full custody and she lost it,it would depend how she stated the problem. If she reported them as missing/concern the police would be obligated to verify the children's wherebouts. It did not sound as if they took the children on her behalf therefore not nulling/voiding his parental rights. But verifying their safety wherebouts were it posed would be mandated. Although visit was a nusiance to you both.
I hope for the sake of the kids and all involved that terms can be decided and an amicable resoultion is made regarding visitation etc. Often times parents can get caught up in the past hurts, power struggles etc causing stress on the kids
. While it is expected that you be supportive perhaps you can act as a catalyst to improve this situation it seems as if it is stressful for your relationship and the kids. I am certain the police also would be needed/prefer to deal with more serious matters than domestic disputes on parental rights/visitations that were determined in court long ago.
If the matter can not be solved it seems as if a return to court to hear and redetermine the matter would be necessary for all parties.
Good luck
2007-12-28 16:21:47 · answer #1 · answered by Woman in Red 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could possibly be a part of the problem and not realize it. She might be trying to make his life as chaotic as possible just to get you to leave because she is jealous of you.
I don't think that you have done anything to provoke her, but you don't really need to. If she has no custody, or parental rights without your b/f giving her permission, she probably has a lot of personal issues.
I suggest that you pay a lot of attention to the way things progress from here, and don't rush into anything.
The laws and what the cops can do very in every State, and we can't help you with that part of your question. I does sound like your b/f has an argument for harrasment charges against her though.
2007-12-28 16:17:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my I feel for those kids. Those kids are the ones who are going to suffer. She should of brought them home on Christmas at a decent hour so you all can enjoy Christmas with them as well. That was selfish on her part. Why couldn't she talk to her babies on the phone? What harm is that going to bring. Selfish on your boyfriends part. They both are putting the kids in the middle and those poor kids shouldn't be put there. Both need to grow up and be good parents and stop playing stupid games.
2007-12-28 16:19:24 · answer #3 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ex wife IS a real parent too... your husband simply has custody..
One way to set things right is for your husband and his ex to have a SCHEDULE OF VISITATION drawn up by an attorney and file it with the courts. This should have already been done during the custody hearings. If so, both parents need to follow and abide by the schedule. If not, maybe your husband could consider one.
Both your husband and his ex need to start acting like adults too.... sounds like they are having one hell of a power struggle over the kids... and who gets hurt in the crossfire? THE KIDS!
If i were you, i'd gather my dignity and act like a lady, and attend to my own business. You aren't their mother.
take care of YOU first.
You emailed me and i haven't changed my mind.. however, you sure have taken on a lot raising those kids...
Your husband needs to collect child support from her, as well... if she wants to see "her" children, then perhaps she could contribute to their lives and help support them?
There is no easy answer to your problem.. i still think that acting like a lady and being a good role model is very important... and let your husband deal with the ex.. you have enough problems.
2007-12-28 16:17:53 · answer #4 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound right to me at all. Make sure you have court document copies to show the police in the future. You may also consider a restraining order is this type of behavior continues to disrupt your lives. Start documenting everything..every contact between you all and her in case you need it later as evidence. Quite frankly the police were probably being lazy in Christmas since it was a non emergency situation, they may also have been short staffed.
2007-12-28 16:30:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's biased, but women often get the advantage. I suggest having a copy of your custody agreement handy to show the officers. Let them know there is a reason for the agreement. Also, make sure that hubby isn't taking advantage of his power.
Their mother is a 'real' parent, so make sure you remember that. Regardless of what she's done or how you and hubby feel about her, she is the mother of those kids.
2007-12-28 16:19:14 · answer #6 · answered by George Michael B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Both of them are the real parent. Apparently there are no restrictions on her taking the children or visitation stipulations on her part otherwise the police would have visited her for failure to return the children on schedule.
2007-12-28 16:18:39 · answer #7 · answered by Mrs. T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a wonderful environment for those 4 kids. What a shame.
2007-12-28 16:15:17 · answer #8 · answered by oorah_83 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, honey, she is the real parent too. She sound like she needs to grow up or something.
2007-12-28 16:14:06 · answer #9 · answered by Katie 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋