HELP! my bff won't stop cutting herself!!?

Question

my best friend has been cutting her self ever since her and this guy broke up, and he turned into a total jerk! apparently, her life has ben going compleetly wrong ever since then! she keeps promissing me that she will stop, but the next time i see her, i find out she is still doing it, even thought she tries to hide it!! she says that she has a "good reason", but she won't tell me. she says that she "can't" cuz her principal told her not to, but i think that a bunch of b.s.!
she acts like she's suicidal or something! i afraid that the next step up from cutting her self, will be killing her self! i don't want to lose my best friend! i'm scared! what do i do? how do i get her to stop? i can't tell her or my parrents, cuz then she will hate me, and they will just make her see some gay therapist for the rest of her life! and she hates therapists! i don't know what to do! i'm scared for my bestfriend's life! she's only 13, and...well...i just don't know! help me!

Answer 1

This is when you have to tell your parents, and have them tell her parents. If you tell, she might hate you but she gets help. Don't tell and she dies. Do you want her to be dead because you didn't tell? Oh, and what does she know about therapists? She doesn't have enough information to hate all of them.

Answer 2

I'm going to cut right to the chase here, because this is very important. Your friend needs serious help. Whether or not she thinks going to the therapist is "gay" doesn't matter, because that is what she needs. I have known cutters who swear that's what saved their lives, even when they didn't want to go. I think you should tell a teacher or school counselor. As required by law, they will pick it up from there and get to the bottom of what is going on with her. You can tell them not to tell her the info came from you. Or you can leave them an anonymous note. If you've seen the cuts, then other people have too. She won't be able to blame it on you. Because you care about her, you have to tell. There's no way around it. This is not something you can fix on your own.

Answer 3

I am kind of going through this same issue. But I told their parents and now she is getting the help she needs. If she is not discussing the bigger issue with you she does need someone to talk to and therapy can really help her. She may hate you for a little while but eventually realize how you saved her. There is the alternative where she may be doing it for attention. OR it could be an issue that happened when she was little such as molestation that could be causeing her deep dstrees activated by her and her boyfriends break up. Whatever it is you must tell either you loose her to death or to non verbal communication at least you know she will be saved that the non verbal. SOrry you are giong through this and I hope it turns out much better!

Answer 4

She's probobly an emo.
help her it's the right thing to do
She wont be hating you if you tell someone if she's dead
so thats why you should help her
i feel really bad
if i was in the same situation as you i would freak out too!
but the most i would do is tell someone that could help and it doesn't matter who!
She's 13 and she should live very long
Also keep trying to talk to her tell her that cutting your self wont get the anger/sadness out
find out and tell her another way to express her feelings
im only 12 and i'd hate to have a friend tht would die that young
Please help her if you were a true friend

Answer 5

ok i know how she feels i had the same problem i also am 13 but either way the best bet is to tell ur parents and wen ever she goes to see the annoying therepist that ask too many questions that u go with her and stay with her the whole time be with her every step first ask her tho if it is ok that u tell a grown up and tell her u'll b wit her every step of the way like a stalker sort of and if she says know ask her if she would at least tell u these "reasons" to help u understand i hope this helps

Answer 6

Try speaking to her again, calmly. Invite her over for a hot chocolate or something. Research on the internet about it and get some of the dangers and stuff about self harming. When she comes over ask her if she's still cutting herself. If she answers yes tell her about all the dangers and that she might end up killing herself. Just tell her how much of her life shes got ahead of her! driving, marraige, drinking, clubbing, q
ruby wedding anniversairys, love, hen nights, etc! Her life has only just begun, why ruin it because of a stupid boy that she will forget about completely in the next few years. They'll be loads more boys coming into her life in the future. Everyone experiences someone not right for them who ends up breaking their heart. Let her know that she WILL regret killing herself, make sure she knows how upset everyone else will be aswell. Alot of people supposodly cut themselves because it makes them feel in control? She's probably insecure, shes definatly upset about this boy.
Here's a good website about self harming...

http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/Understanding/Understanding+self-harm.htm

If this doesn't work tell her that you might have to tell your own parents or her parents about this horrible habbit she's picked up because you're worried for her, her health and her life!
Make sure you speak to her about it first though and only tell someone as a last resort. Don't be scared, she'll thank you for it one day.

Good Luck!

Answer 7

Thirteen? That's just so young to start. I agree with everyone above that answered, no matter what, you have to tell her parents. What matters more? I'm sure, if you tell her parents or maybe hint them, she'll forgive you. Because I'm pretty sure they'll tell her it's not the end of the world because it isn't. If you don't...Think about it. What will happen to her? She'll end up dead...On drugs. So, she'll end up in a Therapist's office anyway. It's better if you make your move now, before she gets worse. I know I am in no position to say things like that, but something like this just bothers me. What's scares me is...I'm saying this and I'm probably younger than you.

Answer 8

WHAT U SHOULD DO AS A FRIEND IS TELL AN ADULT AND HAVE THEM HELP HER THIS IS A VERY SERIOUS SITUATION AND UR FRIEND NEEDS HELP... SO IF U WANT TO HELP HER TELL HER PARENTS OR SOMEONE AT SCHOOL THEY WILL KNOW WHAT TO DO... IF UR FRIEND HURTS HERSELF OR KILLS HERSELF UR GOING TO FEEL VERY DEPRESS SO GET HER THE HELP SHE NEEDS.... THERE ARE SOME GOOD THERAPISTS OUT THERE AND NOT ALL ARE BAD... THAT IS THE ONLY WAY SHE WILL GET BETTER HELP HER EVEN IF SHE GETS MAD WHEN SHE GETS BETTER SHE WILL THANK U FOR THAT.... AND FROM A MEDICAL VIEW SHE WILL NOT HAVE TO SEE A THERAPIST ALL HER LIFE...

Answer 9

People cut themselves for different reasons: a way to feel something, it may be the one and only thing they feel they can control in their lives, they may be punishing themselves for something, it may be a cry for help, it could be for attention, etc. Unless she confides in you, there is no way to tell. Not everybody who cuts is suicidal, but that doesn't mean you should rule it out.

Cutting may be a signal that there is a deeper emotional disturbance then just a break-up. She needs help. You can't fix this for her. You can be a shoulder for her, you can be there to support her, but sweetie you can't fix it. Talk to your parents or another trusted adult about what you should do. They will likely tell you to tell her parents (which I agree with), but ultimately that is a decision you will have to make on your own. Keep in mind she may be a danger to herself. ok?

Best Wishes.

~J.M.

Answer 10

Even though you dont want to tell anyone you have to at least tell your parents to get it out of yuur system.also call 1-800-668-6868 and ask them what to do.and next time you see her dont just let her say nothing, you have tell it like it is and leave her with somthing to think about. Cuz no guy in the UNIVERSE is worth killing herself over,or cutting herself. Even if shes mad at you,she will thank you in the end. I would rather have my bff mad at me for awhile but then get her back to her old self, then her going suicidle!also you could see if she could get a new bf?

Answer 11

First of all calm down. Second, think of it this way if you had to choose her possibly dying or her being mad at you which one would you choose? Third, read a bit about cutters if you can. From my understanding they cut to release pain, frustration or what have you, not to try and kill themselves, but I am not a dr.and that is what she really needs. I personally think you need to go to her parents (try if you must when she isn't around or doesn't know). Let them know you are telling them this in confidence. Then as a parent they can hopefully go to her and discover what she is doing in a supposed accidental way. And hopefully your name will never be brought up. Someone needs to be told that can her help.