Living together before getting married? Good or bad idea?

Question

Please explain!

Answer 1

I think that it is a good idea. Some people have unrealistic ideas of what it is going to be like. It is better to find out before the wedding that you cannot put up with the other person and their habits. You never really know a person until you live with them and are with them day in and day out. When you only see a person at scheduled times and they know when you are coming over it is a lot different. When you are there everyday they quit being on their best behavior.

Answer 2

I see no problems with living with someone before marrying them. It's a great idea actually.

1) Housing is expensive. If you plan on marrying, combining incomes/household is better then wasting money on 2 rents.
2) Marriage is a huge adjustment. Imagine getting married today and then living full-time with someone you've only dated and maybe spent a few nights with. There are bound to be certain quirks that you never discovered about him/her. Better to easy into live together, instead of having all these life changing things happen at once.

3) I don't believe living together before marriage is bad. If you truly love someone and are getting married for the right reasons, you're marriage will work out.

If you get divorced, you can't blame it on living together before marriage. That's crazy. Your issues would have still been your issues if you lived together after marrying.

If you love someone, I think it's fine to live together before marriage. This is a new generation. My mom has always been an old fashioned, church going person. Growing up, she always said living together before marriage was wrong.

Now that I'm grown and in my 20's, she actually changed her mind. I have a really great loving and caring boyfriend of 3 years. Recently, my mom said, "You know, if you and (boyfriend's name) moved in together, I would be OK with that. I know both of your intentions are good and he's a nice boy." We hope to get married soon and my mom can see we love, respect and care for each other.

That's what really matters in a marriage, not your pre-nupital living arrangments.

Answer 3

I personally think it's a good idea. My husband and I lived together for 4 years before we got married. It gives you time to adjust to each other and see if there are things you just really can't stand about the other person.

Answer 4

I think it's an excellent idea and should be a requirement before people can marry. It would probably eliminate a lot of divorces because it would eliminate plenty of marriages...too many people think they are "in luv" and want to marry, then find out afterward that living with that person 24/7, and having all the mundane responsibilities of running a household together, isn't what they thought it would be.

Answer 5

Very good idea. And keep your finances as separated as possible, each of you paying into the joint account, but each having their own account as well. Also, you need to write down what each person will be responsible for financially. All of this will protect you greatly if you ever do split. But living together really does make a huge difference. You get to see the worst of each other. Then after you have seen the worst there is to see, if you can still be with each other, it will be much stronger than just trying to make it work because of being entangled financially and legally.

Answer 6

Good idea, for sure. My husband and I lived together for 4 years before we got married.

Answer 7

according to my psychology class it is a bad idea because once you are married there is less commitment and blah blah blah. i believe that if you are dead set on it it can be just fine. now that i do know what it is like to live with someone i wouldn't marry them without doing it first. i mean if you have never lived with someone then how do you know you will be able to stand all the things they do when you aren't around and they are home alone? but the down side is that you won't have the excitement of coming home to your first home together after the honeymoon. the choice is yours but if you are truly in love then nothing should be able to break you down

Answer 8

Good idea, the pain of finding you married the wrong person is too much to handle. A few years of living together will teach you about them. Marriage only benefits if you have children, and there is always time for that.

Answer 9

Bad - by giving it up he/she has no reason to get married.

Look at resent history - most people live together these days, those that finally get married end up divorced - those the don't get married end up hating each other - a few make it

Answer 10

I think it's a good thing. I lived with my husband for about a year before we married, and when we did marry we knew we could handle each others quirks and stuff, but I didn't live with my ex- husband before I married him, and well he's my EX.