my boyfriend has been telling me for days now that we sould have sex im only 14 and im not ready hes 16 he says if i loved him i would give it up what do i do???? =[
2007-12-28 10:32:02 · 55 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
Thank everyone you guys really helped :]] im going to tell him that if he really loved me he wouldnt bring it up till i was ready and if he gets mad then he just wasnt the right guy
2007-12-28 10:47:54 · update #1
no u shouldnt because hes just gonna levae u afterward dont trust him hes a mania hes gonna do that to anyone he can i bet
u should trust him! seriously
ull regret it like crazy
2007-12-28 10:35:04 · answer #1 · answered by cutecoolman1 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honey, if there are any doubts (which there are, you wouldn't be asking if there weren't any) then the times not right. You're also still very young. You may not be ready mentally, emotionally, or physically for sex. If he pressures you to do anything you're uncomfortable with tell him that you're not ready. If he's a good guy he will respect your decision and leave it at that.
Also, if you guys haven't talked about what you would do if you accidentally became pregnant you're not ready. Just keep in mind what could happen, and at your age you still have your whole life in front of you. there's no need to rush it.
So just sit down with your boyfriend and tell him your not ready and if he pressures you any farther you might want to rethink the relationship.
2007-12-28 10:38:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its like what everyone else says, If HE loved YOU, he'd understand you're not ready. I know there are a lot of pressures because when I was 14 (not that long ago), that was the age everyone started doing it. I thought it was so stupid when someone said that - 'pressure'. It sounded like something out of a self-help book, but it really is there. There's the legality factor too, he's 16 and you're 14. Depending on where you're from, sex is illegal between you guys. If you're not ready and he keeps telling you these stupid things, tell him to get lost and find someone who actually respects you.
2007-12-28 10:39:06 · answer #3 · answered by resateka1692 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Somebody that is willing to pressure you in that manner not only doesn't love you but likely doesn't like themself much either. There are so many things that can go wrong if you do "give in".
1. Birth control isn't 100% effective
2. Some condoms don't prevent sexually transmitted diseases.
3. Your 14 and likely will look back at this guy in a whole new way when your older are REALLY regret your decision.
4. Life is hard enough without adding the extra junk to it. Enjoy school, one day you WILL miss it. Love your friends! Your parents drive you insane - but one day you will understand why don't understand before you have to.
2007-12-28 10:38:59 · answer #4 · answered by April S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what..I gave it up my first time to a guy just so he would stop saying that ****. And apparently that was rape and I was able to get him kicked out of the army for it. DO NOT EVER give it up unless you TRULY love the guy and feel you are ready. At 14 and even 16 you are not ready and not deeply in love enough to have sex. Just to let you know my son was a birth control condom baby. So the only 100% protection out there is abstinance..so please decide wisely here my friend.
2007-12-28 10:38:11 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same answer as everyone else. Like they say "Let him go and if he comes back, then it was meant to be. " If not, let him go and find someone else who is willing to respect you, your decision and your body because most likely, if he gets you pregnant, he wont be the one to stick around. Wait ... life is no rush. Youll have PLENTY of time for all that. Right now, just enjoy being a teenager and respect yourself. Im 25 yrs old and look back and think... I could have waited for all that growing up.. There was no rush.. I just hurt myself in the long run. Just wait and enjoy life without all the pressure of sex. Hope this helped
2007-12-28 10:59:25 · answer #6 · answered by sweetums789 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ASK him if he is ready to pay for a baby.
Ask him if he will get two jobs to pay for rent, and car.
Ask him if he can also go to College so that he doesn't have to work at two jobs.
Ask him if he can clean house, was dishes and change poopy diapers.
Ask him if he can take care of the baby when he is at home so that when baby is sleeping you can give him crazy sex.
Then ask him to do it for six months.....first. Then. ask him if he still LOVES YOU.
LOVE, has NOTHING to do with the feelings that he is experiencing with you now. Hormones are a menice to the word "Love"
I am a dad of three, and grandfather to twins, I am 62 years old and I was about 45 when I finally learned all of the above.
Just say no way Jose, The cost of loosing your BF now is so much easier then the next 22 years of NOT BEING ABLE TO ENJOY LIFE NORMALLY.
WHEW.........APPLAUSES WILL BE ACCEPTED.
2007-12-28 10:43:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it, if he really loved you he wouldn't be pressuring you either.
And I'm really sorry to say this, I hope I'm wrong, but it's most likely true: If he's 16 and you're 14 chances are he's just using you.
If he keeps pressuring you leave him. It's not worth it. I'm sure you want your first time to be with someone you love and because you were ready, not because you felt like you had to to prove your love right?
2007-12-28 10:38:11 · answer #8 · answered by RoyGBiv456 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If HE loved YOU, he would be willing to wait until YOU are ready.
Tell him if he keeps pressuring you, you will break up with him and find someone else that won't pressure you. You will see that person as more caring for you than he is, and you will probably end up giving it up to that person because they would be more deserving of it than someone who keeps pressuring you.
If he gets mad, let him. That's a defense mechanism designed to manipulate you to get you to do what he wants you to do. Same thing if he threatens to break up with you. Its playing games and if he feels he has to do those types of things, let him go and "play" another girl just to get into her pants.
I'm a guy. I know how horny guys get. If you let him do it once, he will be wanting to do it all the time, and if you don't let him, he will get mad at you over it.
Believe me, he just wants what HE wants!!! He's not considering what you want, or whats best for you.
2007-12-28 10:42:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! What would you do if you got pregnant? or got a disease? No man is worth that!!! Or I should say horny teenage boy.
No one should ever say or use Love as bait. It has nothing to do with love. You could switch it and say, if you respected me, you wouldn't push my buttons. I would kindly tell him that there are other fish who would respect you and your body and would never use things against you to try to get you to have sex.
Wait. It is very very worth it. You are worth the wait. When you meet guys in the future, get to know them as friends only. Tell them that upfront. You really need to get to know them first and wouldn't you want to be best friends with the person who God has intended for you?
You stick to your guns and tell him he can go find someone else, because you are smarter than that. Happy New Year.
2007-12-28 10:37:59 · answer #10 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie I'm an old gal now , but let me tell you a story. When I was 16 I dated a boy 19 and he was just like your boyfriend. I said no and stuck to my guns. He came to respect and love me all the more. We later broke up but I was the love of his life. I believe because I never gave in.
2007-12-28 10:37:33 · answer #11 · answered by Pearl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋