Do you think Mommies should still go clubbing?

Question

I've left my teen and college years behind me, but I'm still young and my friends are too. They all want to take me out clubbing on New Year's Eve, but I'm not exactly thrilled about the idea. Because I look younger than I am (I'm almost 24), I feel like one of those teen mothers who leave Baby behind with Grandma so they can party and drink. Granted, I won't be doing that (son will be with Daddy) but I feel like as a mother, I shouldn't want to go clubbing and hang around girls who will just get drunk in some sweaty club. I don't drink and there are other ways to have fun with the girls, such as going out to eat, etc.
What do you other Mommies think? Is it acceptable for a Mommy to be in a club with a circle of "Wooo! I'm so buzzed right now!" friends?

Answer 1

i dont see the problem with having a night out now and then. being a mommy is tough, and everybody needs to have time off even for a couple of hours. i had my daughter 11 weeks ago, but i dont think i'll be ready to leave her for a long time yet, as im breastfeeding i cant drink, and have to be there to feed her every couple of hours so it just wouldnt work for me. but if i could i would. x

Answer 2

I am 19 and have 2 kids and have only ever been clubbing once that was a couple of months ago. My partner looked after the kids as none of our family will babysit! I think if a parent wants to go out clubbing once in a while then why not? I dont particularly like drinking and going clubbing i would much rather have a quiet drink at home or in a pub. Because I have kids and alot of my old friends dont they still want to go out clubbing and getting drunk but I feel I dont because I have more important responsabilities but I have nothing against those who can still find the time to go out. Even parents still need to have fun and a social life!

Answer 3

I think it's totally ok being a mommy doesn't take away the fact that u are still human. As long as you don't start going every weekend and start neglecting your baby it's fine. I on the other hand would love to go out not even clubbing just out with my hubby but for some reason I have not been able to let go of my little guy. If you do decide to go enjoy, have fun, be safe and most important take a really good shower before you touch your baby you don't want all those germs on your little man.

Answer 4

I'm going through the same thing right now. I'm 25 and married, our son is 7 months old. I haven't been out (other than the occasional dinner with my husband) since our son was born so it's been well over a year (including my pregnancy). My husband wants to go out for New Years and leave our son with his parents. So far all I've said is "maybe". I keep putting all kinds of stipulations on going out, like ... we have to be home by 1:30 am, we can't go anywhere more than 30 min away from him, I will not be drinking, etc. etc. The more I think about it the guiltier I feel. I realize that one night out is not going to damage my son, but at the same time I wonder if this one night out is worth it considering my sanity? I guess I'm not being much help now am I???!!!
What I can tell you is that I've never passed judgment on any moms you need an occasional night out. I have a 16 year old brother and I tell my mom (when she feels guilty about going out), "You're a responsible mother and you deserve to reward yourself for the awesome job that you are doing". It is acceptable for you to be out with your girlfriends only if you feel ok about it. It does not matter what anyone else thinks or says. Hanging out with the girls at a club or just going to dinner and a movie will only be worth it if you feel ok with it. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 5

Well, my friends are all slightly older so when we go out, it's not quite that type of party atmosphere but slightly more subdued. We still love to have fun and go out and dance (and a lot of my friends are musicians so I have to go to clubs or bars to see them). I think it's important to have mommy time away though. To help combat the guilt I feel about leaving my boy, I usually wait to leave until he goes to sleep and am home at a respectable time so I'm able to have a fun time with him the next morning. I'm not much of a drinker, so 2 is my limit at most, but it's good to get out, dance and visit with your friends. It's important to remember that you were a person before you had your baby... and you should still have some of that life now, even if it's only twice a year.

Answer 6

I know how you feel. One of my really good friends has 2 children, ages 4 and 2, and she goes to the bars and clubs every weekend. She just leaves them with her parents, who she still lives with. I haven't been out a bar/club since my daughter has been born, and she is 13 months old. Not that I don't WANT to now and again, but that when I actually DO get a night off, I would much rather sleep or just have some alone time with my husband.
I'm sure it makes me on of those boring house-wife types, but that's just the way I parent. I'm young too (I'll be 24 in January), but I don't want to act young, you know?
If you want to go out this New Year, then have a blast. You don't ever do it, so your entitled to a fun night out. Me and my husband have talked about going out this New Years as well. You (or myself) are nothing like those mom's who act childless on the weekends. So, have fun and be safe!! :)

Answer 7

For myself I don't think it is a good idea, but for other mothers a girls night out once in a while is ok. I know some mothers who make a habit out of it and I think that is terrible. If you feel ok with going out I say go for it, but from the way you described it you don't seem too thrilled about it. Make sure your comfortable and that you don't feel pressured into doing something you don't really want to do. Whatever you do this New Year's Eve have fun!!!

Answer 8

This is a tough call... you need to do what makes you feel comfortable. I have repeatedly declined these types of invitations since I got married and had a baby. Its not because I think my girlfriends are doing anything wrong, and it isn't wrong for a mom to do these things, but I just can't "get back into the groove" of doing this.

I'm too tired, I worry about all sorts of things, and I also worry about the next day, because unlike them I have to wake up and be a mommy where as they can just sleep in and have a day to make up for being up all night. Also, I am so annoyed anymore with the males at these places... assuming every girl wants their butt grabbed... so I don't go anymore. I have a hubby at home.

I still like to go to my girlfriends houses though, make some drinks and watch a funny movie or play a stupid game so we laugh all night and have fun...

I'm 25, so pretty young as well.

Answer 9

There's nothing wrong with having a girls night out even if you would be drinking. New Years people get drunk that's kinda the point. So you could help them by being the designated driver and blackmail picture taker :) You can still have fun at a club without being drunk as well. Just because your a mom doesn't mean you have to give up everything you enjoyed to do. There's no way you "should" feel as a mother. You're just you. If you enjoyed going clubbing before having a baby then you can still go clubbing. No one will know you're a young mother unless you keep talking about it all night. Go have fun and you can spend all day new years day snuggling with your baby after you've gotten your YaYa's out! Just this last weekend I left my baby and oldest girls with Grandma and I went to a party with my husband. I got drunk off my you know what and actually threw up for the first time. It was Sooooo fun. I felt like I was just dating my husband and didn't have responsibility for one night. I'm 25 by the way. The next day after sleeping it off I was ready to be a mom again. If you never do anything fun as an adult (going to gymboree doesn't count) you can start to regret your kids because you lose yourself and feel like you only exist for your children (and that's a bad thing because they will grow up and go away). SO go have fun with the girls. You don't need to drink, and you're still a good mom. Everyone needs a night out to act like a teenager!

Answer 10

I know what you mean about teen mothers who leave their children to go clubbing. I think it's immature and irresponsible. If you're old enough to have children, you're old enough to take care of them and leave your partying ways behind.

However, I'm 24 myself, and there are some days when I just want to have fun...and when I say that, I don't mean partying every night, or even every weekend. But I think occasionally going out with your friends is fine. If that means drinking in a club, or having dinner, or seeing a movie, I think it's good to get out and have some grown up time without the husband. And as silly as it sounds, it's nice to have a guy buy you a drink, and know you're still attractive, and then go home and have some fun with your husband!! And I think it's good for him to do the same. I encourage my husband to have nights away from a bratty three year old and a hormonal wife. But everything in moderation. Go have fun with your friends!

Answer 11

just because we are mothers doesn't mean we don't have a right to have fun, sweetie go out and enjoy yourself. I even drink once in a while, but not when i ahve my son, or if hes going to be around anytime soon. maybe once a month if that normally not that often my son stays with grammy, and i have a couple drinks, now granted im not as wild as i used to be, I still deserve to have a good time w/o my son once in a while!