MENTAL HOSPITAL PHONE MENU
Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital .
Please select from the following options menu:
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't m atter which number you press, nothing will
make you happy anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.
If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press
9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.
2007-12-28 01:34:08 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
Love that it is SO funny! We have something very similar to this on our mobile phones as a ring tone. First time I got it Tc phoned me when we were in Tesco & the reactions from the other shoppers was SO funny! We had a couple of people ask if we could Bluetooth it to their mobiles!
2007-12-28 12:51:31 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very Good, I like that. But....
Most of the time when I am not in the mood to deal with the automation, if you will, I will press "0" very fast many times over and over. After about 15 or 20 seconds I stop and listen, usually there is a very annoyed person at the other end. Then I proceed to explain why I called.
The worst part is talking with someone in India or Ecuador or some other location other then the USA.
2007-12-28 12:45:29 · answer #2 · answered by Tinman12 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hate them with a passion!!!!. And this is America. Give it to me in English, and if they don't like it they can hang up. No Habla Espanol!!!!! I usually just try the 0 first to see if I can actually talk to a real person/operator. But these days even that is farmed out to some foreign country, so if you do get someone on the line, they are probably in India or somewhere else and you still can't understand them, then you end up hanging up out of frustration.
2007-12-28 10:40:06 · answer #3 · answered by Moe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate them. Pressing 9. Pressing 9. Pressing 9. Chuckles and a star!!
2007-12-28 04:32:21 · answer #4 · answered by noonecanne 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have made my day. I haven't had a good laugh in such a long time. Thank you for your question and yes I do dislike having to press one number only to go to another number to press. Not to long ago I had a problem with my cable and when I called I was connected to a computor which walked me through to fix the problem. After the problem was resolved I started to say "THANK YOU" when I realized I was talking to a computor.
2007-12-28 02:08:14 · answer #5 · answered by dizzeeone 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I hate those type of phone lines! And that is what our world is coming to!!! Even when I press "0" for a real operator, I have to wait so long that I am always tempted to give up.
2007-12-28 01:39:00 · answer #6 · answered by Harley Lady 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
And they say the patients are crazy. I love the automated messages that take you around and around ending at the same place and then after a couple of minutes of silence, disconnect you!
2007-12-28 10:04:59 · answer #7 · answered by DR W 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Try calling Homeland Security Sometime. The whole country could be wiped out before you got the right extention. I HATE THEM.
2007-12-28 02:30:10 · answer #8 · answered by Star doodle 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think every one hates them. I get tired of waiting for a real person and just hang up.
2007-12-28 09:02:35 · answer #9 · answered by Aloha_Ann 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
LOL!
I DO hate those automated phone lines! I swear, it takes sooooooo long to get through to any business these days!
2007-12-28 01:38:43 · answer #10 · answered by Clare 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋