Through the last few years I've discovered that my Dad has a rather unique relationship with his mother and it's really weird. He'll make excuses for her when she does something wrong, he'll go to her house if he has something that needs sowing on his clothes (rather than going to a tailor), and he seeks her approval for everything. It's weird and freaky and I don't know what to do about it. What should I do?
2007-12-26 13:47:15 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You can't do anything about it. This is something your dad would have to do something about if he wanted to. I think he might need to see a therapist to break a pattern, but you cannot do this for him.
2007-12-30 02:39:02 · answer #1 · answered by Simmi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Defending people for their wrong, especially in their absence, is a noble thing. It doesn’t necessarily mean that your dad’s condoning her wrongdoings. He may be just trying to cover her from shame despite the fact that he knows she did wrong. If this is the case, he is doing a good thing.
As for your dad’s going to his mother for sowing, that’s a way to save money. Tailors are not cheap. Now as for his seeking her advice for everything, is it literally “everything,” or just “a lot” of things? If it’s literally everything, then perhaps there is something wrong with your dad. But if it’s for “a lot” of things, maybe she’s truly worth listening to. Instead of condemning your dad outright, why don’t you try hearing her as well? She may be very worth listening to. She’s your grandmother. She deserves your respect, grandson.
2007-12-26 14:15:23 · answer #2 · answered by Jedidiah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, there's nothing wrong with that. It's not weird or freaky. It's a relationship that your father obviously treasures as your grandmother won't be around forever so hell yea he caters to her. That's what he should do since she popped him out of her. Wouldn't you want your child defending you (even if you are wrong), making you feel useful by doing little things for him like mending his clothes, etc.
I don't see anything wrong with that..but then, I respect my parents and don't allow people to bad mouth them.
I'd hate to be your father. You seem like you'd dump him in a nursing home and not care. IMHO
2007-12-26 13:57:34 · answer #3 · answered by gloristar 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I hate to be derrogatory, here, but your father needs to be weaned from the titty.
One of my very very very former boyfriends was so much the momma's boy that he needed her to wipe his @$$ after he took a $hit. No, not literally, but nearly so. He needed her for EVERYTHING. He'd call her up (no joke) three times a day, just to say hello. I don't generally believe in the stereotype of men as sissies, but he wasn't just a sissy, he was a pu$$y of the loosest kind, if I may have special permission to be ghastly in my description. A multitude of pardons, but he was.
Men like this cannot be helped. They're either momma's boys or they're not. There are truly two kinds of men in this world.
I feel sorry for you. What a prison sentence!
Good luck.
2007-12-26 13:58:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
ur dad loves his ma n he grew up depending on her.still does it sounds like.but what does it matter if ur ma dont care i see no reason u shld he has less time with her now she is older n the clock ticks on .let him have his glory of knowing he spent that time with her
2007-12-26 14:07:29 · answer #5 · answered by Psychologist In The House 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your mother doesn't mind, you shouldn't either. Just because I'm not thrilled with my daughter-in-law, I have to accept that my son is.
2007-12-26 13:51:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
dont be like your dad, thats what you can do...
2007-12-26 13:54:42 · answer #7 · answered by inkgddss 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋