I feel so sad?

Question

I lost my baby last month. I know it was early in the pregnancy but to me it was a baby. I had names picked out, and I was talking to it too.

I started to feel a bit better a couple of weeks ago, but now I'm feeling worse again, and I'm crying all the time. I keep thinking I should be pregnant but I'm not.

Yesterday was Christmas day and my niece said what a great mother I would make, completely out of the blue. She doesn't know I was pregnant and she doesn't know I lost it.

I try to focus on the things that are going well in my life, but I find it so hard. When I stop being busy and I'm alone I cry and I cry, and I can't seem to stop. Is this normal? And what can I do to make it better?

Someone asked me how many weeks I was... I was 4 weeks. I only knew for 3 days and it was gone. I was trying for over a year already.

Answer 1

I've been through what your going through, I found out I was pregnant and not long after that I lost it... It is a very hard thing to deal with, but you will react to this just as you would react to the loss of a family member or loved one... you will go through a period of grief, and it's harder to deal with because most people dont understand how much a misscarriage can affect someone.... Just take time to yourself... I found that shopping, spending time with my friends, family and boyfriend really helped, it does get better I promise... I'm 36 weeks pregnant now and thats helped me more than anything... if your going to try again I wish you the best of luck... I'm very sorry for your loss, but crying is and being depressed is completely normal... just do what makes you happy.

Answer 2

I believe that everything happens for a reason and your loss could be the beginning of something wonderful. Grieving is so hard. Try writing about your feelings in a book whenever you get swamped by them. Try going for a short walk and look at all the beauty around you in the trees and the animals. Stop to smell the roses or whatever you take that to mean to you. Take time to let yourself get over this. Tell yourself about all the good things in the world and you might not feel so bad. The baby you lost has a purpose that is so much greater than this world!

Answer 3

I am so very sorry for your loss. It is completely normal to feel the way you are feeling. My mother miscarried at 8 weeks when I was 9 years old. It devastated her and she had to be admitted to a grief counseling center to help her deal with the pain she was going through. It has been nearly 20 years and it still affects her at times. However, it does get better and while the pain won't ever completely go away, you will be fine. Take as much time as you need to mourn because it will help you heal. And the suggestion to talk to a parent/sibling/friend/counselor is a very good one, sometimes just getting those feelings out can help. I'll keep you in my prayers.

Answer 4

I would say under the circumstances, it is completely normal. Your loss is still very new and it's understandable that you are still sad. Maybe because it is Christmas and you've been too busy to process things...or maybe it is because of the the comment (although very sweet) by your neice.

I would say, allow yourself to grieve. Crying is ok. You can't put a time limit on these things. If you really feel like it is affecting your life, maybe find a message support group. There's a great one on sheknows.com

http://talk.sheknows.com/forumdisplay.php?s=&daysprune=-1&f=162

Good luck. I hope you are feeling better soon.

Answer 5

You have to believe that everything happens for a reason.
Honey it was not meant to be this time but the time will come.
It is perfectly normal to feel emotional.
Even though you lost your baby early your hormones will still be settling down.
You will get threw this I promise.
Talking and writing is good as it gets it off your chest.
Chin up girl because it wont be like this forever.

Answer 6

Everyone has to grieve in their own way.....try and find someone to talk to, mom, pastor, counselor....sometimes it helps to talk things out with someone. There will be more babies. I lost a baby in 1973, and I was devastated, but then I was very young. My grandmother told me there would be more babies....I had three....she also said that God takes care of things that aren't right....like maybe my baby was sick, or whatever......good luck to you.

Answer 7

its normal to feel that way. u should seek counseling asap. maybe talk to your doc too, get on an antidepressant if your not gonna try 2 concieve right away. im sorry for your loss.

Answer 8

I don't know. I bet this is really hard on you. Everything happens for a reason even though it's hard to realize sometimes. I am so, so sorry for you loss.

-God bless.

Answer 9

You're in mourning....You lost a child...it's completely natural. Find someone to talk to, it will help.

Answer 10

No doubt you will be a mother again. See your physcian at once and tell him how you feel he can help you to get help.