If you've been with a lot of people before meeting your SO should you be totally honest and hope that it doesn't change their opinion of you, or is it okay to lie and save yourself? (I don't mean anything like incurable STDs or children, but maybe your number is pretty high)
2007-12-26 09:12:34 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why would you tell them how many people you have been with. Save yourself the arguments and troubles that will follow and dont say anything. If you are asked, just say a very low number....
2007-12-26 09:17:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Why lie? Don't you want to be 100% honest with them? Look be honest but omit facts that will embarass you. Instead of giving a number tell them "I'm well versed in......"what ever it is your talking about dating, sex, relationships or whatever. This way you aren't having to lie but aren't hurting youself or them. Most people don't like to know all the details while others want to compare to know if they are satisfying all your needs better than your ex's..... I personally would be careful in what I discuss if my "number" was pretty high because it can build resentment or even unwanted curiosity.
Momma_Bear
2007-12-26 17:21:53 · answer #2 · answered by the_morris_bears 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My opinion will be, if I don't tell, I don't lie. How can it be a lie if you simply don't say anything? Unless ... you want to get rid of this person forever.
Men have had far to high expectations from girls in their lives, why can men do these things and women must stay virgins until they marry? Woman also have urges and hormones, I'm not saying go with every guy you see, but if and when the time is right to do it, do it and go on with your life.
Let sleeping dogs sleep.
2007-12-26 17:31:17 · answer #3 · answered by RSA2Aus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am actually in your shoes now, my number is pretty high, like over 50, but that was before I was saved. I have told my 'SO' that I had a lot of boyfriends, but I didn't tell him how many. one day I asked him hypothetically how he would feel about a girlfriend having over 50 previous sex partners, and he told me that he would NEVER date a woman like that. sooo I just kept my mouth shut, with men sometimes it's best to let sleeping dogs lie. Even if you want to be honest, leave it in the past, because this will be hard for any man to accept. my boyfriend told me that he doesn't want any woman that body has been used and abused by a gang of other men.
I just told him I have been in relationships with alot of guys, but they all weren't sexual, and this is actually true, I just didn't tell him any more than that...
2007-12-26 17:23:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want a full open honest relationship - don't lie. You will only fall on the blade of your lies if you are found out later.
Certainly you don't need to reveal all details, nor should you have to give names,etc. (unless they are some way in your life still - coworkers, etc.) and certainly don't brag. Just say something like "I did things I'm not proud of while I was waiting for you, but having you in my life changed me for the better". If he loves you too, he will leave it at that.
2007-12-26 17:29:32 · answer #5 · answered by Barb Outhere 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never slept with a lot of women, and i would except the same of the woman I married. and we were honest with eachother before we got married. but, i'm an old fashioned kind of guy that thinks sex is for people in love, and not a past time...
2007-12-26 17:18:46 · answer #6 · answered by NNY 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes u should tell them. being truthful and honest can let u have a good relationship. the person u want to be with should understand thst the past is the past for a reason and its time to think about the future. thats what i am doing.
2007-12-26 17:40:49 · answer #7 · answered by Katrina B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who cares, its in the past? I think if it comes up up should be honest, but it really shouldn't. Being honest doesn't mean you tell everyone your life story. It means you speak the truth when the issue is brought up or effects your relationship.
2007-12-26 17:19:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm honest about my past...and my # is pretty high and I'm into what some people think is some pretty odd stuff. I let them know fairly early in the relationship. If they can't handle it - that's SOO their problem.
2007-12-26 17:21:44 · answer #9 · answered by Dreamweaver back for more 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should it is better to be honest instead of lying or not telling him I told my husband and I did not sleep with more then 5 before him. But he knows and I love him and I think he trust me more know then he ever did so I think that it is better that he knows. And you are honest instead of hom finding out from someone else.
2007-12-26 17:21:35 · answer #10 · answered by Lost 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋