yea, well i m a teen in the upper years & i have never dated, never kissed (not even on a dare) & never done anything. i m also really inocent kinda, cuz i never look at porn or wanna talk about sex or stuff. mainly its cuz of my realy good morals. but sometimes i wonder if my morals r to much! should i want to kno about this stuff & do this stuff? cuz honestly i get kinda disgusted by talking about it & just want my 1st time to b good. (i m kinda shy & not the prettiest girl in the world) but i m nice & have lots of friends. but i can never get a guy, but thats anotha story! so i realy wanna stick to my beliefs & stuff, but i always feel horrible when us girls are talking & they are sharing their experiences & good moments, but i neva had any. so wat should i do or think when my friends talk about this & i feel bad. ( i wont let any1 kno about my past cuz i just moved to a new skool) advivce please & thank you!
2007-12-26 08:04:06 · 15 answers · asked by advice giver & needer! 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Hi!
Well, to answer your question, I have a question for you. What do you think is more important right now; having experiences that your friends have had, or keeping to your morals?
I had never done anything (kissing, dating, etc) until I was 17 years old. That was when I met my boyfriend, and we've been dating happily for almost 4 years now. I managed to stick to my morals but still be happy with myself and my relationship.
The way I managed it was to just look at other people who had relationships. When I was in high school, I heard of so many people getting together, doing things, and then breaking up. Yes, I wanted to date, yes, I wanted to be happy with someone, but I didn't want to keep breaking up. So I decided to wait until I found someone who shared my outlook on life, someone that I could really trust. I was lucky enough to find him!
On the other hand, my sister is now 27. She waited to date and all of that until she got into college, and she has dated a lot of guys, because she really felt for them at the time. Even so, she hasn't had a steady boyfriend yet and she is questioning her life now. The only thing I can tell her and you is to be patient. When you find the right person, it will all be worth it!
I hope that this helps you. Good luck with your decision!
2007-12-26 08:11:43 · answer #1 · answered by Katie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, u shouldn't b feeling regret. U should be proud of yourself. Be happy you don't feel the need to look at porn, thats a good thing.People don't take kissing serious, but I define it like sex. You share that with someone special. Im not having sex or doing anything crazy, but when I kiss someone..I feel like Im losing apart of myself. Stick 2 your morals, thats' what will help u..not how many boys you laid with.Morals are never too much.
Another thing, u mention not being the prettiest thing in the world. Stop thinking like that now. You are contributing to the moralistic culture as being nerdy, bible carrying librarians. We are more than that. You must get some confidence some how...that thought alone turn people away and make it more likely 4 ppl 2 tek advantage of you.
I understand how you feel, but you are doing the right thing. Don't mind what these girls are saying because YOU are right. Save yourself 4 the right person.
God Bless
2007-12-26 09:20:53 · answer #2 · answered by Just Dance 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was like you in high school and throughout college. I'm 24. I haven't drank, I've never smoked, and I waited till I was in a loving and commited relationship for a long time before I had sex. To this day I've only been with one guy and that's my husband. I have a lot of respect for you and if you have respect for yourself others will respect you too. Just be yourself and keep your morals. You're doing the right thing, trust me. I wish there were more people out there like you! If people are your real friends and they really care about you, they won't care about your past. Show your friends you can have a good time with out sex, drugs, and alcohol. Movies, bowling, skating, horse back riding, video games, shopping, there's plenty to do out there. Be yourself and love who you are. I'm very proud of you and I have a lot of respect for you, so I know others do too. Don't be regretful for it. Happy Holidays and good luck at your new school!
2007-12-26 08:16:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
"Your" morals are "Your" morals for a reason and I very good one I must say. No person should put you down or make fun of you for what you believe in. Your belief has a purpose and I believe it to be a good one. If I could go back in time and Have the same beliefs and morals you do, I would.
I commend you for being yourself. Don't feel bad. Other teens should look up to you!
2007-12-26 08:10:48 · answer #4 · answered by colleenjp78 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm a lot like you. I really dislike talking about those type of things. I learned more about it when I was in 8th grade, but I never had the urge to "do it" with someone else. I'm sixteen, and I still squirm whenever I see it on a movie. I noticed my innocence brings me joy.
Don't tell yourself your not pretty. All these girls pour make-up on their face. I see worrying about your looks as an insecurity to other things about you. If you are happy with who you are and what you want to do, no one but yourself can change this.
Turn that regretful feeling into joy for having respect for yourself.
2007-12-26 09:15:41 · answer #5 · answered by Innovater Jill 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be proud. I was a lot like you. I ended up meeting the man of my dreams (handsome, smart, sweet, and a great kisser) my first year of college and now I'm married to him and we are expecting our second child. My husband is the only man I've ever been with. I dated a little bit before him but I don't have any crazy stories either. I'm proud that I didn't fool around with every boy in school and I don't have any regrets that way.
2007-12-26 08:08:59 · answer #6 · answered by Precious 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Having a set of values is not a bad thing. Try talking to boys might be a good start though. Those skills always come in handy.
2007-12-26 08:14:47 · answer #7 · answered by Islander 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't regret this. your morals are what keep your good character strong. trust me, out in the real world these morals are what is going to give you a good life with lots of friends. there is a guy out there for you. don't change who you are. i know so many people who have conformed because of this same problem, and many of their true friends hate who they become. you're not alone. a lot of people have this problem, they're just reluctant to talk about it because they think it will make themselves seem weak. keep strong! don't change!
2007-12-26 08:20:00 · answer #8 · answered by anonymous 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you're just not ready and there is nothing wrong with that. You shouldn't put yourself down and say you can't get a guy. There is someone out there for everyone so just be patient. You will meet the right guy eventually.
2007-12-26 08:09:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You keep your morals and never apologize to anyone for them! They are a wonderful thing!
2007-12-26 08:08:32 · answer #10 · answered by nonameblonde 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋