My friend who I have known for years... 20+ actually is on marriage #3. Her last husband left her to due the fact she couldn't conceive children.. ( lame I know). She met her current husband on Yahoo personals. She found really great evidence of him cheating on her early on. She also moved in with him right off the bat. Of course she kicked him out.. and he was back 2 weeks later with a wedding date set. I asked why would she do that and accept such a crap deal;? She said she just couldn't make it on her own despite the previous alimony and child support. Since then... she has had a baby with hubby#3 and she told me he wasn't thrilled about being a dad. I don't agree with my friend, but it is her life.
2007-12-26 06:29:05 · 20 answers · asked by BeeBee 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
FYI>. forget to say that this friend of mine also is a Mary Kay consultant and is a high school english teacher.
2007-12-26 06:35:56 · update #1
Your friend is tremendously insecure. Stay on point and continue to give her support by being her friend. She really needs you right now and always. What shall we then say to these things? If GOD be for us, WHO can be against us? - Romans 8:31. The Lord daily loadeth us with BENEFITS, even the GOD of our salvation? Selah. - Psalm 68:19.
What a wonderful friend you are, to be concerned about someone like that.
I wish you a most prosperous, healthy, God-endowed, Happy New Year.
2007-12-26 06:37:50 · answer #1 · answered by In God We Trust 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I see your friend actually works. I don't understand the need to stay with a man unless her means are soo great there is no way she can make ends meet.
SHe is very insecure and certainly feels like her options are limited I can see that! SHe must of been able to conceive after all... she has a new baby.
Marriage is taken so lightly these days and some peeps just need a mate no matter who he or she is.
2007-12-26 14:42:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's not living her life. She should have learned after marraige 1 on how to manager herself. She will always be stuck in her ways as she has prolly done this sort of thing her whole life. Please dont think im bagging on your friend- im sure she;s a great person. But she has a very dependant personality. She needs to develop a backbone and take control of her life and understand she dosent need a man to take care fo her and her child- especially one that isnt hapy with being a father.
Good luck
KC
2007-12-26 14:35:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being alone sucks and no ones perfect, he hasn't continued to cheat, right? A lot of men don't like the responsibility aspect of fatherhood that's why they work late, overtime, on weekends, and will use just about any excuse to avoid being home or helping out. They cloak it in the guise of "needing more money" but the truth is they just don't want to be there, happens all the time. You shouldn't judge her or be critical, she is a grown woman.
2007-12-26 14:36:05 · answer #4 · answered by Lv Dr. 4U 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know hundreds of miserable women who can't take care of themselves and are trapped in abusive and unloving situations because they can't afford to leave.
I was there myself. Then, I decided I would rather be on welfare than live another minute with a monster. I was becoming a monster myself.
I left and guess what, i was instantly able to take care of myself, and not have to live like a rat.
This is testimony, loud and clear, to get an education, get a career established and THEN get married. So that if and when you need it, it will be there to help you.
It is killer to try to get a college education, work and raise kids. Kids don't deserve that crap.
Maybe she will stop getting married and raise her own kids herself and get her life straightened out.
2007-12-26 14:38:36 · answer #5 · answered by Lottie W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of woman do it. Its sad that they settle for less than they deserve. Tell your friend that there are good men out there and maybe try living a cheaper life style until she finds what she deserves.
im confused though- I thought she couldn't conceive? but now she has a baby with hubby 3?
2007-12-26 14:34:20 · answer #6 · answered by blah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is moving too fast and just keep jump from relationship to relationship. It is clear she is not learning from her mistake and then having kids doesnt help. It would be good for her to save as much money as she can and get out of debit. Then so can start over it would be hard and she need to try something different but from the sound of it she is not trying.
2007-12-26 14:39:53 · answer #7 · answered by RL9700 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, some people just let life happen to them and don't realise that they are responsible for their own choices. Nothing much anyone can do about it but you sound like a very good friend and believe me, they are few and far between. Bless you!
2007-12-26 14:33:58 · answer #8 · answered by curiouscanadian 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend who will readily admit that she just can't be alone. I don't get it. In my opinion, there is always a way to be alone, and that being alone may be better than the current situation - regardless of whether it is money, or that the person just thinks they can't be alone.
I don't get it - but like you said, it is her life!
2007-12-26 14:33:31 · answer #9 · answered by IJToomer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It isn't that she can't make it on her own, it is because she chooses not to. She may have to change her lifestlye and do what it takes to survive instead of giving in to every whim. However, it is up to her on whether she wants to live the way she has for the rest of her life.
2007-12-26 14:57:00 · answer #10 · answered by TexanBrat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋