for the reason that my husband refuses to get a job and support his children? Will a judge let me take my kids out of state where cost of living is less and my parents are near so that I can support them on my own? I am currently living in NY state.
2007-12-25 21:34:17 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Pay close attention to what I'm going to advise you to do. It's probably the best counsul you'll get.
Watch this movie alone: "War Of The Roses" with Kathleen Turner, Danny DeVito, etc. Afterwards, you will see how nightmarish divorce can be. Sure, the movie is for entertainment, but based on my friends' experiences with divorce, it is no less horrible.
You can't believe how expensive divorce will be. In the process, you'll probably become bitter enemies. Avoid it if possible.
Next, rent these two movies, and watch them with your husband:
A Home Of Our Own
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107130/
Places In The Heart
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087921/
Instead of pointlessly nagging your husband about getting a job, INSPIRE him. If these two movies don't act like a big hammer knocking some sense into him, nothing will work. Trust me, I'm a guy, and as a male we will do anything to avoid giving into nagging. However, when something is our own idea, we will pursue it with all the energy and passion we can muster.
Don't be so quick to divorce (unless he gets violent). If you still love him, try this instead. What do you have to lose?
2007-12-25 21:47:04 · answer #1 · answered by pachl@sbcglobal.net 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The laws change from state to state but if you can show the court that it would be reasonable for you to have the support you need by having your parents close by so you can work/attend school to support your children that you ex cannot do then I don't see why not. It happens all the time.
2007-12-25 22:48:03 · answer #2 · answered by LC 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you sue for SOLE custody and list the reasons why then a judge will probably let you go where you can better support your kids. I hope that you get a lawyer to address this issue for you with a Judge. I got sole custody AND child support and he was given visitation rights and I had no restrictions on where I lived.
2007-12-25 21:39:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
of course you'll get custody. most of the time the judge grants custody to the mother anyway. but yes. if you tell the judge that your husband wont get a job and you're willing to do what you have to do to make sure your kids are going to be okay then the judge will be on your side. my step brothers were granted to my step dad because their mom wasnt trying to find a good paying job. she was working at a bunch of minimum wage jobs and my stepdad was running his own catering business. the judge saw that the kids would be better off with him so they're just allowed to visit their mom sometimes.
2007-12-25 21:38:33 · answer #4 · answered by MzDeeDeeL!C!Ou$ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have joint custody then you can't leave the state where there father is, and why would you want to take them away from their father. I am the only provider in my home. I have 3 children, and my husband doesn't work. Whether he works or not I still have responsibilities that need to be taken care of. if I decide to divorce him, then he can see his kids whenever he wants, and he can do for them when he can. i like to know that I am independent enough to take care of my children whether their father does or not. I would never take them away from him. They need their father just as much as they need me.
2007-12-25 23:38:07 · answer #5 · answered by Sweet 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take the kids and move now. File for divorce once you have established residence in new state and county(In Oklahoma you have to be in state for six months and county for 30 days).It will take you that long to get back on your feet anyway and have a good clear mind to what you are doing. Get a restraining order (not protective they are different) as soon as you move.
2007-12-25 23:52:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes
2007-12-25 21:37:02 · answer #7 · answered by gensley2000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Win?" There is no "winning" in custody as children "loose" a parent.
Since he isn't working, it is doubtful he will fight you. Mothers take their kids away from the dad's all the time and unless he fights it in court, mother's can get away with it w/o permission from the court.
So your not going to let the kids see him, or have they already been brainedwashed to believe he is a lazy oaf and doesn't love them?
2007-12-26 02:43:08 · answer #8 · answered by atheleticman_fan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes
2007-12-25 21:39:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hope so.
2007-12-25 21:47:35 · answer #10 · answered by gloria b 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋