How can she do it?

Question

A woman at work who I was good friends with has recently just completely switched off and now ignores me... how can someone do that?

Background... she had an abusive husband who she left at the end of 2006, she came back to work and she and I were already friends but she became my close friend, with her relying alot on my strength and support, which was fine and we were, I thought, good close friends - best friends in my view as she shared her life with me and I with her... anyway, she moved over to a new office in November, and I went over to the same office a couple of weeks later, and all of a sudden now she behaves as if she doesn't know me; ignores me, doesn't say hello, doesn't want to have lunch with me anymore.

I have agonized over what I might have done, but there is nothing. It hurts me as she was someone who I cared about and would have walked on coals to make her smile and now, she just ignores me. Am I right to resent her? I've asked what's wrong but she says "nothing".

Answer 1

You may not have done anything. Perhaps she is embarrassed now that she shared intimate details of her personal life with you and wants to back off of that intimacy. Or, she may just be very busy learning her new duties etc. If she tells you there is nothing wrong, accept it. You may want to stay in contact occasionally but maybe outside of work, a card, an "I just wanted to say Hi" call but don't push. If she wants to maintain the friendship and sees that you aren't pushing for intimacy that she's no longer comfortable with, she'll warm up again. Otherwise, just appreciate the friendship you had and realize it was a temporary one based on mutual needs in one phase of your lives.

Embrace your other friendships or make some new ones to help take your mind off of this person.

Answer 2

Have you talked to her? Maybe you did something or someone could have made up a rumor. Also thers a chance she might be jealous of you, like a friend or boy told her she thinks Ur hotter? yeah but hey think about it we live in diff rent times and people don't appreciate what a friendship is.


talk to her.

Answer 3

If she is back with the abusive hubby he could have told her to stop see you as he sees you as a threat to his control of her or she is embarrassed for going back to him and cant get the nerve to tell you.
Or she took offence to something you did or said and just doesn't want to bring it up.
But give it some more time and see if later she wants to talk over lunch.some people just change or out grow old friends.But good luck and Merry Christmas.

Answer 4

there has 2 b a strong reason behind her behaviour...iff u really care then u ve gotta find out the cause... try askin some of her other close friends or her family about the problem if u no them nd then deal with her..

Answer 5

I hate to say this, perhaps she felt something amiss between you and her. Trust me, some females are very very sensitive even though we don't have such intension at those time.