how do you feel about marriage?

Question

with today's society and the divorce rate, i don't think people view marriage in the same way as they used to. people don't mean the vows they make and therefore they should be changed (i.e the death to us part bit). Personally i am quite cynical and i think marriage is just a piece of paper that people think signifies commitment but in reality if you're in a serious relationship you should be committed to that one person only, anyway (if thats what's agreed). However many women (and maybe men?) still dream of fairytale marriages and get all hung up on whether they are married by a certain age etc. How do people feel about this? Is marriage just about financial benefits?

Answer 1

I don't believe in the concept of marriage. I think that if two people really love each other and want to spend most of their lives together they don't need a piece of paper. As long as that is what they both want.
Fairy tales are just that.

Answer 2

I don't think there are any financial benefits being married anymore and if there are, it always comes at a price, usually an emotional one! Personally, although I would never marry myself, I do believe in marriage, I think people get married too young - when you're in your 20's you're still immature in many ways, not much life experience (though this isn't true of all 20 somethings!) but there is so much emphasis on settling down and having children in your 20's and I guess no-one REALLY sits down and looks at their partner and asks, can I be with you and only you for the next 40/50 years? That's one helluva commitment when you're 20 something! It's far to easy now to get married and then have the attitude of oh well, if it doesn't work out I'll just wait 2 years and get divorced.

I believe couples who are set on spending the rest of their lives together need to be moving in the same direction and not just for a year or two but permanently or for as long is possible, if you have aspirations, dreams, hobbies and goals that are the same then the chances of marriage working out is pretty strong because you're both moving in the same direction and want ultimately the same goals (this is hard to find I know!). I genuinely believe that most people have an idea of where they're going in life and what they want to achieve when they're in their 30's and above, had relationships, got hurt a few times, had fun too but probably have more of an idea of what it takes to make a marriage work...may be I'm wrong but if you're happy and content with yourself then you usually find that like-minded people feed off that. Why is it that people have friends for years or sometimes a lifetime, yet they can't find a partner for the same length of time...complacency, routine and taking each other for granted are just some of the things that will doom a relationship. Maybe the answer is to find a best friend in your partner someone you can be honest with and tell and share everything with them and know that they'll never judge you, will always be there for you and will love you no matter what?! There's no rule book on how to make a marriage work and last, if there was, we'd all be married and happy! It's the same old cliche but communication and compromise really is key!

Answer 3

Homosexuals have been having mock wedding ceremonies for decades, they make wills which allows them to leave their possessions to whomever they want. They can do almost everything people who are recognized by the government as being married can do, if they are intelligent and have a good lawyer. The question should be why does the government recognize partnerships at all? They don't care who my best friend is, they don't care who you share your rent with, the only time the government cares who you spend your rime with is when it benefits society, and thus the tax payer as in a business partnership or when it damages society, as in gangs. According to social science children do better when they are raised with both a mother and a father. Go to any prison, mental institution, or drug rehab center and poll the people there. A huge portion of the people in the place will tell you they were raised without one of there birth parents. This has been tested over and over again, children do better with both a mother and a father. When the child doesn't have both the chances increase that the child will not finish school, will get addicted to drugs, will commit a crime. And when this happened the government, and thus society pays. So the government has allot of interest into making sure that children are raised in a kind of family that they will thrive in. I know you are probably thinking that any two people in love will do but contrary to what the feminist say men and woman are different, children need the advantage of having those differences when they are being raised. So why should the government care if two homosexuals get married? They would not care if your partner were just your room mate that you share the rent with, so why should they care if you are having sex with your room mate? This isn't about hate, I have had friends that were homosexuals, in my wilder days before I became a Christian I even partied with many homosexuals. Jesus said Matt. 19:4-6 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. Marriage was for a man and wife, not for 2 men and not for 2 woman.

Answer 4

AMEN!!!! My exact same thoughts......... I don't believe in marriage and will never marry anyone. Love is not about a paper, committment is not stronger after signing one. Just ask the bunch of wives and husbands that have been cheated on...... nowadays or 50 years ago. People won't commit if they don't want to, whether they sign a paper or not. I'd rather live happily with the person I love for as long as our love lasts, than staying in an unhappy marriage - probably even being cheated on - just because "I promised/vowed to"... that's not what committment is about.

Answer 5

No it is just not a financial commitment. It is the ultimate commitment. You are right about people not taking it seriously enough, however. Just be sure that you and whomever you decide to marry realizes that lust, and having things in common is not all it takes to make a marriage work.

Marriage takes devotion to each other and a willingness to work out any difficulties that the two of you may be presented with. (believe me there are always going to be those difficult problems every now and then--"in good times and in bad") Lastly , you must truly love each other, trust each other, and be willing to make sacrifices for each other.

Don't bypass the opportunity for the great, most rewarding commitment of your life!!

Answer 6

I think it is the mutual agreement between spouse/partner no matter whether it is written or not. It represents mutual understanding for what is going to be. In today's society, marraige agreement does provide security (eg. financial/ child matters) to the one and other just in case sth. changes.

Nonetheless, I do feel the paper does provide bothside a gretater responsibility on what they are going into. Very last, the MR. & Mrs thing also provide others an easy perception that they are couples (ie. setting a small barrier for third party entry into the relationship).

Answer 7

first i was married for 20 years . was very committed but it don't work one sided if the other is out sleeping around. true some don't take it serious but i do. would i marry again cant say would have to be someone very special to get to my heart. live together i see nothing wrong with that as long as both understand that mean's no cheating . financial my married was not for that reason i really loved him so much i was blind to alot and took a lot of mental abuse .I know now i deserve more and wont settle for less.

Answer 8

Marriage is not good for me. This social practice or bond should be removed. But again that would be a problem. So in my opinion, marry the right person not to someone just like that.

I am not happy with my marriage, I loved my ex who cheated on me. These emotions are very dangerous. And I guess people shd not be blamed for this, its there in our hormone. Cant help it.

Answer 9

There are some of us who still uphold their marriage vows. What people don't have today is commitment. I' in it for the long haul. The good, the bad, the ugly........ Happily Married for 18 years

Answer 10

I know people that dated for years, got engaged, got married, moved in with each other, and got a divorce within 5 years. I've done it backwards, dated for 2 years, moved in with each other, after a year got engaged, and been engaged for about a year now and we don't even talk about getting married, we really just did it for our families. The way we see it is we're happy and that's all that matters.