I dontl love my husband anymore. we have been married 3 years and probs that i have been unhappy with are:
He lied about credit card debts etc and still takes his mail to work and keeps it there so i still dont know what is goin on.
He does nothing in the house. i feel like his housekeeper, he cant even work a washing machine at 47 yrsold.
He wont talk to me; if i have aprob he either walks out or just ignores me.
He never tries to resolve things or say sorry. He just goes in a huff and it lasts for days until i try to get him out of it. For example 22nd we had a row as he was very drunk and woke me 4am in morning etc. usual stuff. next day we had presents to deliver and food to buy but he refused to go out. so i did and came back and he had gone out and done some shopping for himself - magazines etc. huff continued and wouldnt speak
24th i asked him if he was happy with silence and he said he didnt see a problem. he said he had nothing to say. is it over?
2007-12-25 12:52:16 · 17 answers · asked by cottontail 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well,l am feeling for you.There is lack of communication on his behalf here.l wonder if there is any love either.You have tried talking to him,but to no avail.Was he like this before you were married?You have to ask you self if you really want to spend your life living like this on a day to day basis.Would counsel ling help.maybe maybe not.l am sure there will be better times ahead for,but maybe without your husband.Good luck.l think with him you will need it.
2007-12-25 13:06:23 · answer #1 · answered by Ruby Jane 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's a real shame that things aren't going well in your marriage and I think you are right to feel as if things aren't right.
I think one of two things is happening:
> He no longer loves you either, and has given up working at the marriage, but is too scared to tell you, so is pushing you away;
or
> He has absolutely no idea what his childish behaviour is doing to do. He may think that you are completely in the wrong. He may think that you are used to the way he deals with things.
Either way, you need to have a serious talk with him. Can you take him out somewhere, with you driving, so he cannot storm off? Sit him down and ask him simply and plainly if he is still happy with your marriage. Don't tell him that you don't think you love him any more just yet. Try to find out what he is thinking. If he says he is fine, or won't open up, tell him how you feel. Don't be accusatory, i.e. "you never do this, you never do that" - don't bring up incidents unless he asks for specific examples. Just explain to him that you feel no love from him and are not happy with your relationship and the way that problems are dealt with.
Don't decide that it's over until you have spoken to him. If he still won't talk to you, then it's time to make the decision for himself. There are two sides to every story, so try to hear his before you think about divorce.
xx Emmie
2007-12-26 13:23:22 · answer #2 · answered by Sparklepop 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are waiting for him to make the decision for you but you need to just hold your head up high and do whats best - for you!!! Get the hell out of there you are worth so much more than that, he obviously does not care about your feelings. If he is a genuine guy maybe it's the shock he needs and you can try to resolve issues from a distance before jumping right back in but take back your own life and work out what you want, a marriage is about compromise and give and take.
2007-12-26 08:34:59 · answer #3 · answered by Cher R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know it's over when you have to ask that question. You know i'm totally right, when you read, what you wrote aloud to yourself, fact is, he wants you too go, that's what the behaviors about. If i were you, i'd slip out while he was at work (with his mail), just leave a note stating.... nothing to say, but i don't see a problem.
2007-12-26 23:59:29 · answer #4 · answered by ferochira 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know its over when you can imagine your life without the other person and it doesnt really hurt that bad or at all, in fact it seems pretty good..maybe even better and more peaceful than it is now and you make excuses to aske questions like the one you asked.
Have you guys tried or talked about marriage counseling?
2007-12-25 20:57:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
like your husband i to go into silance with my wife,i think it is because i have grown used to her always needing to be the only one who has an opinion or some times the rite to fell hurt ,for years i have suffered in silance,kept my gob shut,always thinking what is the point,i always thouht i was doing the rite thing but how wrong i was,but your old man it would seem is past that,i think he is hitting back at you in the only way he knows how spite!,alow him to speak while you stay shut and he may tell you more
2007-12-26 07:38:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, you already answered yourself.. If you want to hear it from us, well, yes its over...No salvaging it at this time..Go forward and begin new.. You will be scared, but there is always an ending to something, so be all that you can and good luck...
2007-12-25 21:19:09 · answer #7 · answered by sweetgirl 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Marriage should be a very sacred thing. However if you know you do not love him then there's nothing else to do. I believe you've answered your own question.
Good Luck!!
2007-12-25 21:01:59 · answer #8 · answered by sue 2 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
People don't change.
It's over.
Go take care of yourself ..there is life after a divorce.
2007-12-26 12:12:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully you will learn your lesson and never get married again. Marriage destroys all relationship including soul mates no matter what the circumstances are. If you are lucky enough to fall in love again DON'T DESTROY IT BY GETTING MARRIED!!!!
2007-12-25 21:51:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋