My Best Friend Betrayed and hurt me, is it worth picking up the pieces?

Question

this is NOT over a guy, no men were involved.My best friend is Bipolar, and she is on meds.I don't believe that can be used as an excuse for her behaviour, but then again I don't live with the disorder.We have been Bff's for years and it's mostly been because of my forgiving and understanding nature.But I feel the betrayal has gone too far this time,and her subconcious attempts to destroy herself and everything she loves is finally comming true. I don't want to say what she did,but I knew she would do it.I wasn't suprised at all when she betrayed me.I expected it.And I don't know if thats what I want in a frienship, to expect betrayal.But after realizing that she finally crossed the line she started desperatly trying to appoligize in her own way.She wrote me a long apology letter,blaming everything on herself and admiting that she did betrayed me on purpose to prove that she was **** and to show others that she is ****,and that she doesn't deserve my forgivness but I deserve the truth.

she has hurt me so much in the past, humilated me infront of people.Ruined whole days and weekends. but this was the worst betrayal,this is what finally crossed the line in my capacity to be understanding and forgive. But then I remember the good times, how this girl is my BFF,of how I can talk to her about anything, the little adventures we had together,the guys that came and went, the crying from laughter, the fun,but it's always shadowed with this hateful side of her.I don't know if all bi-polar people are like this,but it hurts to expect and get betrayal from a BF.I can't forgive what she did, it was so utturly hurtful,but I can't forget the good times either.I don't know what I should do,all I know is I feel a bridge has been crossed,but I'm not sure I want to burn it.Also that she is desperate for my forgivness.I know that if I don't forgive her she will go into a deep manic depression and be suicidal.but the betrayal was too deep 4 a simple, your forgiven.what should i do?

P.S-I'm not religious so please no"pray on it" or "ask god" answers please.

Answer 1

You screw up because you always JUST forgive her, LAY DOWN A F'IN LINE!!! If she crosses it then you both know what to do. Also manic/depression, is actually a CRONIC stress disorder USUALLY a hangover from PTSM, in other words. You friend has crappy parents and she's having to deal with that in any way she sees fit. So you need to ether be able to led her in the right direction, or cut her away. Part of being a friend ISN'T the good times, thats happy-horse crap from a person who hasn't had a real good friendship. Its about how you HANDLE THE BAD TIMES TO!!! And your friendship CAN NOT HANDLE THE BAD TIMES! SO crapy relationship, sorry, its true. I've had those good times, but i've had bad times to and how we handled that as friends is why I keep them around. So really, personally, let her go, for your own education, that is not a friendship, that what is commonly known as a fair-weather friendship. Were the only time the friendships on, is when everythings fine, but as soon as storming times come, everyone acts stupid, you, her, everyone. So you really need better material to show you how a true BFF should work. No offense, you have to make mistakes FIRST, before you suceed in life.

Answer 2

Thinking of the good times make life sweet. Thinking of the bad times make life bitter. These are things which are happening in your friendship. I have been in a situation something like yours which mine was my friend sought of betrayed me and really deceived me. It nearly caused all my friendship. The best would be if you let go of this friend. Think of yourself. Take a step back and reflect on whether would you want this person causing you trouble throughout your entire life. I am sure this kind of person is really not worth it. You would not know the inner part of someone and just hope that your best friend would never betray you. This is human nature as we have the angel and the devil within us.

Another way which I do not think you should take which is to talk it out with her and set a limit between you and her. There has to be a limit for this. If you plan to cut the friendship do not worry about whether the person will go into depression or something else as it would not be your problem anymore. You have been understanding and forgiving but it is time for you to let go of these which I think it would be a relief. You would feel very uneasy once leaving but just give yourself some time and hopefully things will turn out to be a better one.