ok so im 17 and i have a boyfriend weve been together almost 2 years and hes going to be 25 years old i used to love him sooo much like id do almost anything and now is like when i kiss him it dont feel the same or when i hug him and i dont even feel like seeing him i always have an excuse for not seeing him a certain day..hes has cheated on me twice and i couldnt forget it and always reminded him about it and later on i cheated on him and flirting with guys and kissing he just dont know about it the other thing is i dont know if hes the one for me is like i want to have other relationships to determine my soulmate is that wrong? and i also feel so bad for him because i know he loves me despite the age diffrence ive seen him mature greatly but is just that i dont want to settle down..and sometimes i feel i wont ever find a guy thats like him every other guy i will be with will be worse then him so i rather stay with him then to go to bad other relationships and regret what to do here!!
2007-12-25 06:38:53 · 11 answers · asked by claudia g 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
#1 you don't love him anymore
#2 you feel guilty
#3 he's already cheated on you.
It's time to break off the relationship and be serious about who and what you're looking for in a partner.
The idea of 'soulmate' is highly inflated, it doesn't equate to sexual partner--a soul mate is someone who can finish your sentences for you, who knows you inside and out and YOU KNOW THEM the same way. This can be a best friend, a cousin, a grandmother, ANYONE of any age or gender. It does NOT mean it's your sexual partner. People get the wrong idea of it because of movies and romance novels, but that never jives with real life.
You're only 17. Serious relationships won't come till you're in your 20's, usually mid-20's since your world view changes significantly till then. Your maturity level at 24 will be extremely different than what it is right now. Don't figure you're forced to be in a 'traditional' dating/marriage thing till you yourself are actually ready for something like that. For most people they want to wait till they're 25 or so before getting that serious.
Be completely honest with yourself. Real life never follows fantasy or fairy tales. There is no white knight to sweep you off your feet and run your life for you. YOU are the only person who can figure out what you need and what you can supply to your partner to make a mature long term relationship work.
2007-12-25 06:46:33 · answer #1 · answered by Elaine M 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all I'd just like to say that 2 years is very successful for a girl of your age so you should be proud of how far you've come. You have forgiven him for cheating on you which shows that you are a strong person.
However, 17 is very young to be settling down and you are totally right when you say that you need to experiance other relationships to determine what you want/need from a man.
At 25 your boyfirend is at a completely different stage in his life so although you may love him, I presonally would tell you to call it a day.
You say that you make excuses not to see him etc which indicates your true feelings.
You cling on for the security but trust me you will find someone else just as good, if not better if you break up with him. Hope this helps and good luck! xxx
2007-12-25 14:47:39 · answer #2 · answered by xjuicyxfruityx 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
U are just 17 now, wait for some more years, U may find someone better and with a less age-difference. Things will be clear as the days pass on. Don't take any decision in a hurry.
2007-12-25 14:47:55 · answer #3 · answered by Sam 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ya know.....17 and 25 is a huge difference as far as life experiences, finances and lifestyle. He's out of school, has a job, may have his own place and has co-workers. He lives a different life than you do. Don't get tied down too young. You'll regret it. What if you meet someone better someday and you're stuck with him???? Then what?? If he's cheated before he'll do it again. It's a guy thing. They can't seem to help it. They can't keep it in their pants if you know what I mean.
2007-12-25 14:44:01 · answer #4 · answered by lacrosselover 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No doubt about it you need to end it and spend at least a few months or more with no dating or romantic involvement of any kind. You need time to figure out who you are and clear your mind. You have been tied up for far too long at your age. Trust me you will regret this later if you don't move on now. Make it a clean break with no reason to see each other again. It doesn't need to be cruel and messy to be over.
2007-12-25 14:49:43 · answer #5 · answered by cat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why don't you guys take a break so you can figure out what YOU reallllyy want. and don't worry about feeling like you won't ever find a guy like him...you're only 17. i mean obviously no two people are the same but life always throws amazing people your way from time to time. =)
2007-12-25 14:43:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you think he may be a bit too old for you. Your feelings are changing because you are seventeen and they are supposed to change. I think he is, as you are just seventeen, and can't possibly be on the same level of anything with someone that much older than yourself. His responsibility as an adult, to protect children, has been broken to you, as a child. Please consider ending relations with him in every capacity, as he sounds like someone on his way to jail. You have a long life to live, and it may seem even longer the more you have him in your life sweetie. You seem to know it is time to move on, listen to your instincts.
2007-12-25 14:55:32 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are lots out there better. You just have to look, and be smart about the looking.
2007-12-25 14:42:03 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you not married, just walk away. Wait until your more mature.
than the right love will come along.
2007-12-25 14:42:37 · answer #9 · answered by squishy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if u both cheated on each other none of u guys r right for each other.
2007-12-25 14:41:20 · answer #10 · answered by Cutee♥Babii 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋