I guess the holidays are a rough time for many people. I have an interesting situation. I have been estranged from my mother for over ten years now. She disowned me for being gay and wanted nothing to do with me after that. Let alone she is a huge religious fanatic(catholic) but had numerous affairs while married to my father including the priest that married them. She is now remarried and has a whole new family that she adores. Fortunately, I live far away from her but nevertheless it is still difficult. I cease to exsist in her world. My father left our family when my brother and I were teenagers and I have no contact with him either. Most of my family doesn't speak to me and I am without a partner at the current moment. My brother is married with children and on the other side of the country and our contact is sparingly limited as time as progressed. All of my friends are with their families and I am alone. I have HIV and want to die. Will this sadness last forever?
2007-12-25 02:44:32 · 6 answers · asked by Brooklyn 4 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Do not allow your happiness to be based on others. Be happy to be with yourself. If you are not happy to be with you how can you expect others to be happy to be with you?
My father and I are not close. Neither are my siblings and I. But it was not something that I did, it is because I am gay. But that is not my problem, it is theirs. I still love and care for them. When they are ready to accept me for who I am, I will be here.
But life is too short to waste on trying to get others to accept me. I am who I am and if they cannot accept that, I do not have to time to spend trying to change their minds.
I am a Buddhist so I spend every Christmas alone, but I am not lonely. I do use the time to meditate, the clean, to think of those that have passed on. I also accept the wishes of those that call to wish me a happy holidays.
If you are sad, I do know that that too will pass as all things do. But I also know that in all suffering there is also joy. I wish you the very best and hope that things look up for you very soon. No one should experience the saddness that you feel today.
2007-12-25 04:02:34 · answer #1 · answered by mikedmags 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to hear about your loneliness. Your mom sure sounds like a real princess. The thing is, you can't control how other people act toward you. All you can do is control how you react back. You have allowed yourself to become defined by your sexuality. By doing that, you have made it impossible for people who have a problem with it, to get to know you on a different level. One might retort,"that's their problem!" Well actually, looking at your current situation, I'd say it is yours as well. Don't allow yourself to be a person who is JUST in the gay lifestyle. My guess is you have many other passions in life. Don't freak here, but God has placed in you gifts and passions that far out weigh your perceived sexuality. You need to find out what makes you laugh, cry and happy and mad. In there you will find what really makes you tick and you will become able to live life not just more productively but you will find more and deeper relationships that transend sex. May God bless you on this new journey.
2007-12-25 11:02:55 · answer #2 · answered by Proverbs twenty7 7teen 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm all alone this Christmas too!
I'm not that sad though, my sister let me borrow her chiwawa (sp?) for the holidays, I'm at work now.
mmm....it's just another day dude. All these ppl with their families, i'm not knocking them but I believe this type of togetherness should happen all year, not just now. i'm sure some1 loves you.
join a new family. you see how ur fam slammed the door shut, there are MANY others that will kick the ***** open just for you!
I'm a Pisces and sometimes I too get lost in myself. My advice, step out and look around. my roomie and I help other ppl whenever we get uber-depressed. which is often.
Sidenote: maybe you should rescue a puppy. they are like little furry angels!
2007-12-25 18:57:59 · answer #3 · answered by somelikeitwild 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The holiday season is the highest level of suicides of any period during the year because of all the expectations of family celebration etc. It's particularly hard on those of us disowned by family members or estranged in some fashion. Hang in there honey, the season is almost over and it will get better.
2007-12-25 10:51:08 · answer #4 · answered by Cathryn 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because of all the emphasis about being home for the holidays and spending time with loved ones...
Yes...the sadness will pass
2007-12-25 10:47:11 · answer #5 · answered by Wayne 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i truly think things will improve for you. merry x-mas.
2007-12-25 10:48:36 · answer #6 · answered by Jerry S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋