Why do you think relationships loose their luster?

Question

I noticed this year was just not as romantic as years past. There seems to be a little less passion and a decline in affection. My wife brought it to my attention and I'm starting to think that maybe she's on to something. What's the best way to rekindle the fire?

Answer 1

I think people get bored sometimes. Or they get surprised when their mate starts to show their true colors. As genuine as we may be, there are things to tell about yourself on a first date, and then more on the next few, and so on, until you wake up one morning and you know what their breath will smell like, and what they will say, and how they feel...all summed up before they even open their eyes to make the same correct assumptions about you. Even the love of your life can get old on you. That's okay.

When this starts to happen, it's no surprise that couples take a romantic getaway. It shakes a couple out of their routine, gets them to rely on each other in a place where you don't know anyone else.

Also, KEEP TRYING. Don't let yourself go, remember your courtesies and your gestures and tokens of affection between each other. Develop new ones.

Last thing I can say is that there's no shame in doing something totally for yourself as a part of your daily routine. You will build a life as a couple but you need your own friends, your own haunts, your own hobbies, your own time. This gives each of you opportunities to get space from the other, and bring new ideas to your life together. You have something different to talk about. When you tell your mate about your day, the other person is unable to say..."I know, I was there, remember?" Another very important aspect of having separate identities is that you recharge yourself as an individual. This is really important because you are responsible for at least half of the energy required to sustain the marriage and the household. When you do something for yourself, you become a better partner to the other person.

Answer 2

"Familiarity breeds content"

I'm kind of suffering the same thing in my relationship. It's not that I love him any less... but the passion isn't quite there, anymore. It's because you've moved through the first phase of lust on to the phase of attachment.

My parents have been married 22 years and they try to go out on a "date night" at least once a month. They also take weekly dance classes together.

I personally think sharing new experiences is the best way to keep the fire alive. Go rock climbing. Take a pottery class together. Eat at a new restraunt. Do something that neither of you have done before!

Remember when you used to work to try to impress each other? Try to keep that alive. Plan days on which you'll both dress your best & go out somewhere (or stay in.. haha)

FLIRT WITH EACH OTHER NOW AND THEN!

Answer 3

a fire...lol...relationships loose their luster because of adaptation to your partner and always being with them you get less appreciation for them...how to rekindle that would be go and have a travel around the world and just learn share some memories to point where ur an old couple in looove ...

Answer 4

hmm one theory is people get used to each other so much that there no new excitement.
seems to affect women more then men.I noticed on a few past relationships i been asked "will we ever get bored"
When married or living together for a long time ,other factors come to play.Worrying about bills ,kids ,rent/mortgage etc etc.
That sort of puts love life in the backburners to a nightly affair and it goes colder from there.

Answer 5

Initiate a romantic evening by doing and setting up a dinner and help her feel needed and Loved.

Answer 6

i think because people stop talking