What would you do if you were getting married to the love of your life and his/her mother said I object when the preacher said "If anyone should object speak now or forever hold your peace"? I'm 16 years old and have been off and on with my potential husband for almost a yr. and ½ now and it's really serious. We've talked about getting married in the past and we still talk about it from time to time but of course we weren't planning on getting married for another 6-8 years or so. I had a falling out with his mother... It's a really long story. Anyway, he told me that his mother would object at our wedding if we had one. Is there any way for me to prevent this? I really don't want this to happen and it's something that's really bothering me. She's the kind of woman who is set in her ways, even though I'm young and have room for improvement. What should I do?
2007-12-24 13:51:17 · 12 answers · asked by pinkythediamond 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I want to have a huge event for my wedding I don't want it to be intimate, and I don't want to go to city hall to just become legally married... I also don't want a commonwealth marriage.
2007-12-24 13:56:09 · update #1
My relationship with Terrance is not a statistic. Also, in 6-8 years I'll be 22-24. That's young but it's not that young. My brother is getting married in May and he's 23.
2007-12-24 13:59:22 · update #2
We're not on and off because things aren't working out. We're on and off because he's going away for 3 months and we don't want to be in a long distance relationship. We've never broken up because things were wrong between the two of us.
2007-12-24 14:06:34 · update #3
Well I can't say never... but out of a year and a half the only time we broke up from not seeing eye to eye was when I was really depressed about a loss in my family and took it out on him and on the day of the wake I took him back because I realized that I needed him more than I thought I did.
2007-12-24 14:08:16 · update #4
WE'RE NOT ENGAGED, WE'RE TALKiNG. Don't say my relationship won't survive you don't even know the half of it. We just talk about getting married in the future it's not set in stone.
2007-12-24 14:10:30 · update #5
My father said that we share some qualities of an officially married couple. I don't see why thinking about getting married is such a big deal. It's not like I'm engaged and even if it was it's not like I'm going to throw my life away I'm definitely going to go to college and reach my goals of becoming a freelance broadway actress. Chill out people, I'm not making a rash decision I know exactly what I want and what I want is to be with Terrance. Now that we've gotten that out of the way can you answer the question I asked you. in 2015 if we get married, what should I do if his mother still objects?
2007-12-24 14:17:28 · update #6
1- In 6-8 years a lot can happen, she may not remember or you may be dating someone else entirely
2- Elope.
3- Don't invite her to your wedding
4- Ministers don't ask that anymore
5- It wouldn't matter if they did, you would be over 21, the President could object and no one would stop the ceremony.
2007-12-24 13:57:48 · answer #1 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are way to young to be dealing with the stress of getting married..You should be concentrating on your education and planning for college and a career..If it was one of my children I definitely would object..You have the rest of your life to get married..You need to live first and do all the things you want before you get married..You will change so much in the next 6-8 yrs that what you want now will not be what you want for yourself then..Think long and hard about this decision..And if you are on again off again that would send up red flags for me..What do your parents say about all this??
2007-12-24 22:12:47 · answer #2 · answered by spldharleymom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well first off you shouldn't be even talking about marriage yet. You need to think of college and friends and what you are going to wear to prom but however........
This happened to me to but at a older age so I am not sure what you should do except try to be as nice to her as possible never yell or get angry at her in front of her it is what she wants. in your case she could think you are going to ruin her son chance with life's experiences so just be sure you let him do things do smother him. When it is a year or so till you are getting married you need to break the ice let her know how much you love him and let her know you are willing to compromise in some ways but don't ever give her the reins to get in between close to your wedding. If its a real lasting LOVE it will make it and your jitters will go away. BUT>>>>>>>>Remember take it SLOW you are a teen live a little. LIFE is Short.......
2007-12-24 22:07:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd object, too. You're 16. You have absolutely no business getting married. You should be concentrating on your education first and foremost, not becoming a wife. Way, way way too young. The statistics say it best: the odds are very much stacked against a marriage lasting when you marry young.
2007-12-24 21:56:56 · answer #4 · answered by N L 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i really think your playing the what if game,, for one your only 16 ,,two,, a lot and i mean a lot could happen in the next 6-8 years one of you could find someone else,, loose interest in each other,one of you could die,, why don't you do what teenage kids are suppose to do,, finish school graduate go to collage earn a degree, be a kid. at 16 you shouldn't worry what your boy friends mom says about your future. she will either change her mind in time or she wont i know this from experience I've been married to my hubby for 24 yrs got with him at 16 yrs old we do have a good life but trust me it was a hard one.you need to grow allow your self to grow up and enjoy your younger years first,
2007-12-24 22:11:33 · answer #5 · answered by jennys 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your attitude will change as you get older. It's not good to get engaged when your relationship is on/off. That's not a good relationship. Only good relationships should be considering marriage. As for your wedding, if you can afford it, go ahead. If it will drive either of you in debt, that's the first step to already being divorced.
P.S. No more falling outs. That's immature. Be the best future daughter in law you can be to his mother.
2007-12-24 22:02:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think 6-8 years will tell you if he is the right man for you. At this point you should be more focused on your studies and career. If you have money, status and a career all other things will follow your way. best of luck.
2007-12-24 22:14:47 · answer #7 · answered by syehusin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are really and truly serious about this guy, give it time...a lot can happen in 6 to 8 years. For the time being, enjoy being with him and don't worry too much about his mom. You are far too young to be concerned with things like this.
2007-12-24 21:56:18 · answer #8 · answered by Witchy_Woman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go out of state and get married. it's hard to object when you aren't there to do so.
Just remember though, 100% of all divorces are caused by marriage.
2007-12-24 22:02:59 · answer #9 · answered by Jaxxonz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In six years you'll most likely have been through several relationships. Don't worry about his mother. She won't be in the picture.
2007-12-24 22:04:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋