know what you think if you heard this from your spouse: comments that the neighbor is beautiful, but you're "pretty", we can't afford to go away anywhere (been together for yrs.), forgot my bday more than once, jewelry and flowers are a waste of $, since I do the grocery shopping, I shouldn't need a couples night out, that should be my outting, when I suggested we go away after my big surgery (see other posts), was told he forgot all about it, then said "well, you did have a double mastectomy" (like I was some sort of freak).....and the best one of all....insinuated that he was doing something he didn't want to by performing or*l sex on me.....didn't want me to do oral on him.....didn't look at me during sex....which was usually only 10-15 min 1x about every 6 wks. And didn't kiss me either. I also found out he's been lying to me about working overtime for 15 yrs. I haven't been happy for a very long time and he's trying to get me to stay, yet talks about 3somes and me w/other men.
2007-12-24 07:10:57 · 7 answers · asked by justlilme 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm going thru with the divorce, Quasi, and I'm not snivelling or breathing life back into it....Some people, including 1 female atty said "at least he doesn't beat you".....I want better
2007-12-24 07:23:15 · update #1
and by the way, I am educated, and I do bathe, unlike some barbarians....cut me some slack.....I know I asked, but for Christ's sake...note correction...have a happy holiday sweetie
2007-12-24 07:33:51 · update #2
i have read your other posts and i also know from the experience of 2 divorces that you are hurt and feel very bad and have low self-esteem right now. u were married a long time, they say it takes 1 month for every year u were married 2 get over the guy. yes he was an a** but its a proven fact that no matter what the relationship was like; ie: weather it was loving or non-loving it was still a relationship and there's still a feeling of loss.
you have filed 4 divorce and i suggest you continue with that. in another post others have given u advice on the threesome u talk about here and how you should value yourself and your body and refuse it and they were correct.
here's a question you should ask yourself, if you stay are you willing 2 lower your standards to allow another woman or man into your bed with your husband, are you willing 2 lower your standards 2 b used as a piece of meat in bed instead of a loving spouse, are you willing 2 lower your standards 2 be forgotten in your relationship...are you getting the point.
you have survived breast cancer, your husband hasn't and only wants another man in ur bed so he doesn't have 2 have sex with you. ever think thats his way of finding someone else 4 u so he can feel good about himself when he finds another gal 4 him?
isn't it time you move on and find a man who will appreciate you for you and overlook what you call bad scarring. u aren't broken or busted, u r a survivor and should be very proud of that. real men look at whats inside a person, not the attributes they only see behind closed doors...beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, ever heard of that.
with all he's done in the past and up to now do u really think he'll change...
2007-12-24 09:22:08 · answer #1 · answered by junkyarddogfan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you reread what you wrote and someone was asdking you for your opinion I am almost sure your anser would be...LEAVE HIM IN THE DUST..cause if he loved you..no mastectomy or any beautiful neighbor would have him disrespect you or belittle you as he has been doing. He wants you to hang around for hisd comfort not yours. GET SOME PEACE and get away from him. You are in my prayers
2007-12-24 07:19:39 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You divorce this guy? Yes? Then quit snivelling and move on. All you people that breathe life back into a relationship and keep it alive when it should be dead amaze me.
Get over it and quit feeling sorry for yourself. Move on for Chrissakes.
2007-12-24 07:20:38 · answer #3 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
not sure I understand about the divorce. But if he treats you that way then leave. I could never stay if I was treated bad.
2007-12-24 07:22:39 · answer #4 · answered by openminded 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there are some long time issues there.he has defiantly lost interest.find someone who will treat you special
2007-12-24 07:19:59 · answer #5 · answered by Mac 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like one of my exes get rid of this guy asap-you deserve so much better!
2007-12-24 07:17:20 · answer #6 · answered by Lunaeclipz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry you marry such an ******, you shouldnt be too sensitive about it, My God!!! that man deserves the worst!!! thank God youre divorcing him!!!
2007-12-24 07:19:02 · answer #7 · answered by suehellen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋