In the meanwhile, I have been talking to this wonderful man and we have a good connection. I told him i am separated, but i am "technically" not. I am of asian descent and it is forbidden to get divorced in your 30's. I am going to spend a wekend with him, to see if there is anything there? I don't like lying to him, but i don't think he would understand if i don't start this off this way. Should I go and see what happens, and then tell him. and honestly i am almost at that point where i do get separated? what should i do, i don't want to start off a new relationship with a lie, but i can't imagine he would give it a shot otherwise?
Also, if i am spending the weekend with him, do I ask him what are the sleeping arrangments?
I want to do what is right, but want to give this guy a shot.
My marriage is over in my head, just in it for a formality. I haven't slept with my husband in over 2 years and I don't sleep in the same bed with him anymore.
What do i do?
2007-12-24 04:18:12 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Honey please tell the truth trust me you do not wanna go there (lying and all), i know you are trying to save this guy's feelings but let us be honest you are being dishonest by not telling him the truth and at the end of the day it is going to be disastrous, l;et him know the situation i know you like him and don't want to lose him.; you will feel a whole lot better if he knew that than you feel now.If he stayed fine if he does scram after you tell him at least you know you told the truth.Please work on getting a divorce if your marriage is over.cheers
2007-12-24 05:37:28 · answer #1 · answered by Versacetica 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well for one, you are doing this all wrong. If you are not happy in your marriage the first step is to leave... not go get a boyfriend, test the waters, then leave. You're an adulter and that is shameful.
You don't go anywhere with this man until you can get away from your husband, get divorced, and are really single. You are stringing this other guy along and playing with his emotions and feelings. THAT IS JUST WRONG. He deserves better than a woman who is lying to them because she isn't sure what she wants to do.
Stop lying to this other guy, tell him the truth.... you can't go anywhere with him because you are still married and not seperated. If he is not angry at you for already lying perhaps he will wait for you to get things straightened out. If he dumps you on the spot, well, you are the one who lied. If he doesn't care you are married and still wants to see you.... then run! He has no respect for you at all and is not someone you should be with.
Don't be like one of those cheating whores... have some respect for yourself and for the other people you are around and involved with.
Be smart enough to realize that no great relationship starts with LIES.
2007-12-24 12:30:53 · answer #2 · answered by az_mommma 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not confused, you are a manipulator. Worst of all you disgrace all women by using your sex to get what you want. You not only have bad Karma but you will always get what you give. If you lie to get in then you will be lied to when you go out.
Sleeping arrangements........Are you for real? You are going to trap him and you know it. You are also trying to lie to yourself but we can all see the truth.
You seem worried that your culture does not allow divorce... Oh, but it does allow a woman to live in the home without respect for old ways....Not! But it does allow women to trap the next victim. Not... You have many, many personal problems.
The solution is to have a dinner party with your friends and all of your family and say what you are doing. I am sure that you are proud of your life and your actions. I am sure they will support you. I am glad that I do not know you.
2007-12-24 12:47:42 · answer #3 · answered by jeff shaffer 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do not start out with a lie. Talk to him about this!
2007-12-24 12:22:35 · answer #4 · answered by 55 and trying 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not date until your divorce is final.
2007-12-24 12:22:42 · answer #5 · answered by box of rain 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be honest and sincere is very important in all relationships.Talk with him and see what happen.Good luck.
2007-12-24 12:31:40 · answer #6 · answered by cobrasnake 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him averything, cuz your right you cant start it out by lying.
2007-12-24 12:25:21 · answer #7 · answered by Scott A 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋