but its happened some before & he didn't keep that promise.
2007-12-22 15:46:13 · 24 answers · asked by rapunzel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would think it was time to go. You are a beautiful girl who I have no doubt has endless potential. You need to look after yourself.
I realize that you probably love him and don't want to go but ultimately he will not change no matter how many promises he makes.
Please leave while you are still in a state to do so. You deserve better than this. Even the bible says that if a man hits his wife then he should leave her.
Don't put yourself through another minute!
Good luck and stay safe.
2007-12-22 16:13:00 · answer #1 · answered by Onyx ♠ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave him......been there, done that! It's a cycle, they are abusive one minute then sorry and sweet the next...it'll keep happening and each time it will get worse. It only takes a second to seriously injure or kill someone...get out before it gets really dangerous for you! If you don't have any family to go to there are womens shelters all over the place, go to a friends if you can but you definitely need to move on, get into some sort of therapy to help heal yourself and if neccesary get a restraining order.
2007-12-23 00:42:37 · answer #2 · answered by my_secret_life2 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Men who abuse women "always" tells them that they won't do it again.
OR - they often say that they were drunk & don't remember doing it. AND .. the man also often tells the woman that it is HER fault that he did it ... not his fault ... that she made him do it. There is even a physcically abuse syndrome where the woman starts actually believing that it is her fault - when it is NOT her fault.
Try to understand, that a man that can actually abuse a woman, hurt a woman, and hit a woman of the weaker sex - has this abusive trait inside of him - and some men are even proud of it - and they can do it just like second nature to them .. and he can & will do it again. It is what he is made up of .. inside him. The ability to do this is real.
There are men who would never - ever hit a woman .. or abuse them. There are men who pride themselves in being the stronger person -- and they just simpley would not abuse a woman.
Then .. there are the ones which is does not bother - and they will do it.
Women who are victims of abuse can really get themselves into a lot of troubles.
Women who are victims of domestic violence and abuse face physical and emotional problems.
Lots of times - women have to do violent things just to protect themselves to stay alive. Prison is full of these types of women ... who were just acting in self-defense for themselves - or for their children or loved ones.
I just could not stay with someone who was abusive. I could not live my life day-by-day - wondering - if today would be the day that he would be abusive again ... and wondering how bad it would be. I could not live in constant fear & wondering. I could not live my live afraid.
If he has abused you -- he is an abuser -- and the abuse is in him to do it.
So .. to answer your question .. if he had abused me once -- then promised not to do it again ... then did it again .. and once again promised not to do it again ... I would not believe him ... and I would be gone forever.
2007-12-23 00:16:58 · answer #3 · answered by Tara 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After 20 years of helping abused women, I can tell you that in all likelyhood HE WILL NEVER STOP!!!!!! The only question is how much time will lapse in between events. You need to get your act together and leave. If you have to go home to your parents, or stay with a friend, or in a shelter, or if you have enough to move out on your own... just do it. Do it before it is too late. You deserve better. You deserve a man who will cherish you and love you. Abusers don't love. They use....
2007-12-23 00:21:00 · answer #4 · answered by Twice as Nice 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It can be very scary but GET out NOW. Have family or friends help you get away if need be. I've been there and been told it will never happen again then it just kept getting worse and worse. always with the apologies to follow. After 2 years I finally left in an ambulance with a head injury and broken ankle. Please don't let it get that bad. Leave Now get a restraining order and if possible go where he can has no idea where you are.
2007-12-22 23:52:48 · answer #5 · answered by shelle 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly i have watched this situation with my parents and then been in the situation with my exhusband! It never ends good! ur spouse has to realize what he did was wrong and want to find out y that was his reaction! if he feels it isnt a big deal then u have a big problem!!! when u are truely loved by a person they will never physically hurt u! i lived and learned..it was the harest thing i eber had to do but i got my childern and i out...then i found true love! we have been together for 5 yrs and my spouse would never hurt me! You do not deserve to be hit on for any reason! if u have kids and you allow this to go on ur kids will most likely comtinue the cycle with their spouse! so if not for you then for you kids do what needs to be done
2007-12-23 00:34:44 · answer #6 · answered by Kat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been in abusive relationships before and beloved that same line. An abusive man will not change unless he truly wants to and seeks extensive counseling. For your own safety and sanity, get out now. I know how hard it is to leave a man that you love, but once you are free and don't have a man hurting you anymore, you will be so much happier. Please just go now if possible. Don't wait for him to hurt you again. Best of luck to you. Be safe
2007-12-23 01:52:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave, get out of the relationship. He isn't going to wake up tomarrow and be cured from his abusive ways. he has a problem and unless going and getting professional help and being dedicated to that, he will only get worse with time. I look at it like this, I wasn't put on this earth to be a guys punching bag. abuse is abuse, you keep putting up with it then you enable him and loose your self respect and dignaty. My x hit me one time, I left the next day, moved out and flew 3000 miles home with our baby. I will not and will never tolorate a man hitting me, pushing me, verbal abuse or any for of abuse and I'll be damned if I would EVER put or keep a child in that environment. I love myself to much to settle for an abusive man.
2007-12-22 23:56:41 · answer #8 · answered by Maalru3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't have given him a 2nd chance to do it again I would have called the police the first time had him charged with assault and battery, changed the locks on all the doors and windows and filed a restraining order against him and filed for divorce.
2007-12-23 01:54:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
a man who abuses needs help..they can say all day long that they'll never do it again...and that will only last until the next time he gets pist off...and maybe you're not the one that pissed him off in the first place..but he will take it out on you..even if you did piss him off it's no excuse for the violence..many women have died because of domestic violence...you should be very concerned for your safety and well being...leave him...
2007-12-23 01:08:20 · answer #10 · answered by ~Jenny~ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋