asked earlier, but want more responses...? selfishness or?

Question

I want to know if I am being selfish or not or what you guys think of this situation...
Last year for Christmas and my b-day (January) I got many gifts. It was good and all. All of them were not for ME, but for my unborn baby. I was greatful and I didn't mid at all mainly. This year however, a lot of gift I don't know what they are but are supposedly to ME, but are for my son. For example, my brother said the gift is for my son, but it is my gift too. Now, I don't want to be selfish or anything and this time is not just for gifts, I know, but I feel left out. You know what I'm sayin? I want something foe me too, you know? I mean, I got nothing for ME at all last year. I had gotten a swing, stroller, baby clothes, etc. last year. My brother even said for my b-day, he got something for my son. I don't understand why my present is actually for my son. I really am not a selfish person or trying to be. I just really feel left out and sad. Am I being selfish? What do you think?

I want to add that, I don't mind NOT getting a gift, but I hate that they put my name on it, even though it is not intended for me. My brother said he didn't have enough money, which is fine, but at least don't put my name on it, you know?

Answer 1

Not selfish at all,but maybe wait til after christmas to bring it up with them, like maybe jokingly say "i didnt get anything this christmas"

Answer 2

I don't think you are being selfish at all. I would tell them how you feel because harboring these feelings is not good for you.

As a side note- just something for you to "chew on". I left home at 16- long story there but it was abusive. My parents never, ever remembered my birthday. I never even got a card or a verbal- hey happy birthday. I do birthday's for my kids and husband up big here. I don't expect anything unless it is handmade by them- husband and kids. They do it every year but I don't make an issue of my birthday. As a child, it was not a happy day. Usually, it fell over Winter Break- and I would remember I had a birthday when I got back to school the following monday when we did the calendar. So, from someone whose birthdays have always come and gone without notice until I met my husband, it's not a big deal. If it hurts your feelings though- you need to say something. Don't carry that around and allow it to make you feel awful.

Answer 3

I totally know where u are coming from my son was born june 28 and my b-day is jul 9 so on my birthday everything I got was baby related which is all good because my son was the best present ever. After everyone left I was just thinking "dang I didn't get anything" but the cutest and most thoughtful gift was from my hubby he got me an electric breast pump because my son wasn't latching on and he knew how bad I wanted to feed him breastmilk so it was great! Let's see what happens for Christmas!!

Answer 4

I know how you feel. Last Christmas my daughter was almost 4 weeks old. On Christmas Eve, my family and I have always gone to my grandparents house, where we open their presents. My brother go this awesome thing for his guitar, and me and my husband got a box full of baby clothes!!! I didn't mind not getting anything either, but but my daughters name on it!!
I think some of what it is, is that babies are so much easier to buy for. Also, they might automatically beleive that we WANT gifts for our kids. Which I love getting (hey, it saves me money) but label it correctly, you know?

Answer 5

the sorrowful actuality is, persons are ********, and as long as human beings prefer extra, extra human beings will die. If we had an almost appropriate international communism, that would probably be ultimate; in spite of the shown fact that, as long as you have basically that small team of grasping douchebags, issues gets screwed. basically seem at a number of the solutions at right here: "If we hadn't despatched our young ones into mines and factories a hundred years in the past, right this moment's GDP may well be a million or 2 share factors under it presently is. And which would be a real TRAGEDY!" are you able to think of somebody announcing this? An American? even perchance a determine? WTF??? Or this one: "Capitalism kills off the week [sic], which ensures that the week [sic] do no longer procreate. Which makes a extra suitable mankind." of direction, they understand they're solid; in spite of the shown fact that, make the international a canines-consume-canines capitalist international, and we would see who in this Earth is the fittest. you recognize it rather isn't any longer maximum human beings. First, we are delicate while in comparison with something of the international, who exertions and toil for countless hours daily. 2d, with a small share of human beings with wealth, and little regulation, many of the the rest wealth might finally end up with that small team. i ask your self who'd be crying then, ninety 9%. i actually have no wish for humanity.

Answer 6

Hey, I don't think you are being selfish at all... I think you are just feeling like other people are not considering you a real person on your own anymore--just some appendage to your baby...it's like once we have babies we no longer have any tastes, thoughts, personality or existence as human beings. it can get to feel at times like people treat you like you are LESS than you were.
and that does not mean you or any of us don't love our kids to death and consider them the most important thing in life...and it also don't mean you want a bunch of big expensive presents for yourself...But hopefully you can let your family know you'd just like a little props that you are still a interesting individual person. You just want to feel like you're acknowledged as still being the woman you were, but now you're ALSO a mom... meaning, you're MORE than you were, not LESS.

Answer 7

No, I can see where you would feel left out. The same thing happened to my sis when she had her baby so now that I'm expecting soon, she made sure that when I had my shower, I got gifts that were geared toward pampering me instead of baby items. I thought that was really nice and the gifts sure have came in handy.

Answer 8

That just doesn't make any sense.

I can see the swing and stroller. That's more for you than the baby, (although, it should have been a shower gift, not for Christmas or a birthday) but baby clothes just don't make sense.

I don't see how to get them to quit without seeming ungrateful.

Joking/teasing is always better than confrontation or trying to "educate" them.

When you open a present for your son, say, "OH look, this one was mis-labled, but thank you, Auntie Rose" (or whatever)

Answer 9

You are definitely not being selfish. We probably all have felt like that at one time or another. I think it is something we all better get used too, though. You know? It's like when you go to visit your parents or relatives- you really don't exist anymore, it is all about the baby. I am not complaining either, but I think from now on it is always about the baby.

Answer 10

not selfish... i can understand the 1st year bcuz it's a big event (the baby coming) but the next year too??? Doesn't make sense...

Answer 11

you rfeeling are completly normal..i dont think your selfish