My ex wife cheated on me with 3 men at one time. I caught her in the act. I filed for a divorce in Feb. She got pregnant in March. Took me to court for child support I told the judge it was not mine. I was not living with her or near her at the time this happened. I got the divorce final in August. And now I am stuck paying child support for a child that is not mine. I cant afford a DNA test to be done so I am going through DSS for help. What else can I do? My ex wife admitted she had a "current boyfriend" at the time she was doing the testing. I just need to know what my next step is to take here...
2007-12-22 05:44:22 · 23 answers · asked by lil1woman79 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
save money for the dna test, if not youll end up paying till hes 18.get a loan or something, if youre pretty sure is not yours, you need the dna test to confirm to the judge
2007-12-22 05:49:05 · answer #1 · answered by suehellen 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
so since you were married they didnt' have to take a dna test. i have one child and pay 400 a month. so 261 is not bad. you can actually call the support agency and the court to see what you can do. good luck man. if the child is not urs then i think she will have to pay you back.. sounds to me that you are currenty paying or haven't paid for to long so that is why you say you can't afford it. its a adjustment you have to make. honestly paying support made me ease my money spending and i also work a part time job. i am currently engaged and just bought a house so you can make the best out of the situation honestly. I honestly would get the money somehow to get the dna test done especially if the child is not yours. be honest with yourself really look at the child and you coudl tell whether it is or not. i knew from the very day my baby girl was born she was mine. had dna done and she was good luck
2007-12-22 05:50:46 · answer #2 · answered by glenn h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get the DNA test if you 'think' it's not yours. You can't prove anything without it.
If the child is yours you will look back on this day and realize that you have waste so much time not supporting your child.
My ex pays... well is ordered to pay... $1,191.00 a month for 3 kids, one of which has special needs. He sees them maybe every other weekend and calls once between visits. If only put half the effort to raise them as he does in avoiding paying anything for them.
Open your eyes and see it's not about the $ it's about the child. You need to see that the more time you waste the child is loosing out on the interactions for a father.
2007-12-22 06:08:13 · answer #3 · answered by Karen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the DNA testing done. There is no excuse. You are being very silly if you think you can't find the $$$ for the testing but only pay $261.00 for the poor baby! That is NOTHING in the face of what a baby costs. Document where you were...and take it to the courts again; she will have to pay for the testing if she wants the support! Good luck to all of you.
2007-12-22 05:54:17 · answer #4 · answered by Gina C 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she got pregnant during the time you were still married but seperated, the baby is legally yours.. So, until you prove that you are not the father, you will have to pay child support..
Maybe you need to scare her and say fine, I want visitation rights and am hiring a lawyer to take the baby away from you..
You have legal rights, and I would be using them right now to get some DNA from the baby, like taking it to a doctor and asking for the testing.. At whatever cost, you need to have it done, so don't pay her for acouple of months and when they come after you, they will just take it out of your pay.. But by that time you have the resaults and can prove your not the father.. Then when she brings it back up and takes you to court, bam, show em the proof..
2007-12-22 06:47:32 · answer #5 · answered by tiny b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are so sure of this, then pay for the DNA test. It is cheaper than paying child support for the next eighteen years. And, why did you take on the responsibility of supporting a new wife, when you can barely afford it. You don't buy a car you cannot afford, why would you take on the responsibility of marriage if you cannot afford it. You clean up your house first before you take on something new. Get the DNA test, and hope your wife stays with you through this dirty process. And, hope that you are telling the truth that this kid is not yours.
2007-12-22 05:50:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
First of all I feel tremendous of sympathy for you if this is the case, because no man,or anyone should be held accountable for someone else actions,but you had every opportunity to defense yourself when this allegation where brought up against you in court,at the time you knew ,or had thoughts that this child was not yours,you should have spoke up them,and for as not being able to get a blood test,I dont believe that for a second,because it doesn't matter whether you have the money or not to pay for this test to be perform, you will come up with the money to get the test perform if you truthfully believe that this child is not your obviously you want to continue to support this child,or otherwise you would resolve this matter quick,fast,and a hurry.
2007-12-22 09:05:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can hardly support your new wife and child, perhaps you should have considered that before you jumped into another marriage. Your first responsibility is to that child if it is yours but you do need to get a DNA test done. Nothing else matters till that's taken care of. Then if it's not your child, you don't pay. If it is yours, you not only need to pay, you need to step up to the DADDY PLATE and do your part too!
Why are you "stuck" if you weren't living with or near her??? This needs to go back to court.
2007-12-22 06:34:41 · answer #8 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean? The court hasn't ordered a paternity test first before ordering a child support? Consult a lawyer, most will have a free consult or at least only $50.
Borrow and beg for the $ - just get the test done!
2007-12-22 05:51:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do you expect us to tell you? Some magic way to find out IF the child is yours? Long distance crystal balls? You had to know this situation was going to happen, before you married. So, either do whatever necessary to get DNA testing done, or pay child support. What's the point of telling us your sob story, when you already know exactly what needs to be done?
2007-12-22 06:08:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you are sure that the baby isn't yours all you have to do is stop paying, she will go through child support enforcement, if she has already done this then they will force the DNA. If this is already being done then all you can do is wait. Did you sign the birth certificate? if you did then you are looking at even more problems if not then just have patients it will work out in the end
2007-12-22 05:52:03 · answer #11 · answered by Meesha 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋