My friend and I are most likely going to the same college next year. I want to room with her, but she doesn't. She is afraid that if we room together we won't be friends anymore. I think we will be fine, but I can't convince her. Should we room together?
2007-12-22 04:56:56 · 11 answers · asked by Anna Banana 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
She's right. You'll already be at the same school, and may even have the same classes. You'll be able to hang out together outside of class, on the weekends, eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner together. It's best if you both branch out from one another.
At least for the first semester of your first year, live separately, and then move in together your 2nd year if u still feel the same way.
2007-12-22 05:01:18 · answer #1 · answered by it's_love 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being really good friends doesn't mean you'll be really good roommates.
It depends a LOT of whether you have the same attitudes about the following:
How clean your place should be (this is HUGE -- if you have different standards, it will be really rough on the friendship).
Policies toward visitors.
Hours. (If one of you likes to make noise and party late, and the other wants to study or sleep, that's a constant source of conflict.)
Food and general sharing: If you both either want to eat communally, and share the costs and shopping; or if you both agree you don't want to do that, and you like the same foods, then it'll work; otherwise, again, major source of conflict. Ditto with things like sharing clothes, music, appliances, and everything else.
Think about all the things that people who live together need to have similar wants and views about. If you think you're compatible on all those issues, then explain all that.
But if you're not the same in all those ways, listen to your friend.
The roomy break up is hard for a friendship to survive, as you get really mad at the other person when you're incompatible and live together.
Try to find out where she thinks the problems will come from, then be honest with yourself about whether you're really compatible.
2007-12-22 08:05:35 · answer #2 · answered by tehabwa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO!
i've seen it happen 3 times in my first semester of college. Most friends make the mistake of thinking "oh, that happens to some best friends... but it won't happen to us!"
there's a reason they tell you NOT to room with your best friend!
actually, one of the biggest dangers is how well you know each other. it's much easier to accidentally over-step boundaries or not give each other as much space/respect as you would a stranger. also... if you room together, there's a lot less chance that you'll be meeting other people. my boyfriend lives with his best friend and now they absolutely hate each other. small things can really get on your nerves...
respect your friend's wishes. she's already made herself clear... why do you keep pushing this? you already know you can't convince her, so don't keep trying. don't feel rejected or hurt. she's trying to keep space so she can keep the friendship, not destroy it.
i would recommend trying to get a room in the same building. close enough to see each other, far enough to have some space!
2007-12-22 07:12:00 · answer #3 · answered by zmamasita 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you do room together then there is a chance that your friendship will change
but then again if you don't room together then you risk each other being best friends with your new room mates and your friendship is still at risk
but since she doesn't want to be roomies then you need to find someone who you think will be compatible with
2007-12-22 05:00:33 · answer #4 · answered by Sharon F 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I consider she is more reasonable than you. You are warm, yes you are. But same room too close you'll be. you know people should have private time, personal space. So what she say is more wise. For keep on being best friend, you should take her thinking. I think she is polite, full of wisdom girl.
2007-12-22 05:16:56 · answer #5 · answered by freshman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wake up!
She wants more space from you
than you do from her.
Give her some room or lose a friend.
2007-12-22 07:00:06 · answer #6 · answered by Irv S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should try to because they matched me up with roomates horribly! My first roomate was a playa that cleaned his shoes hourly, the 2nd roomate was a cocaine addict, the 3rd one left the BIGGEST messes i've ever seen, the 4th one was a severe alcoholic. You know someone to be your roomate? Definately go for that!
2007-12-22 05:01:51 · answer #7 · answered by Psylence 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry Anna, your friend is right, but try to get in the same dorm that way you both will get the privacy you will need.
2007-12-22 05:00:57 · answer #8 · answered by redhotboxsoxfan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldn't push her on it. this will put the space your friendship needs, but it will make your friendship stronger knowing a friend is right down the hall
2007-12-22 05:01:55 · answer #9 · answered by higs59569 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get adjacent rooms!!
2007-12-22 04:58:54 · answer #10 · answered by crystal m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋