i am not regretting the fact that we broke up. couldnt have lived with him cs his behaviour was not tolerable. it was my decision.
then why do i feel so low? i am supposed to feel relieved and stronger. i dont. i feel like shutting everything off and everyone out around me. am i just jealous that his life started off again sooner than mine? three months back i was planning my life with him. and now hes getting hooked to someone else. is there really anything called love? if yes what is it worth? is it something you can put your faith into and bank on or is that just a myth? am i fooling myself if i think its important for me to love someone...cos everything can change and be over in a weeks time..so whats it worth??
2007-12-22 04:07:50 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Just have to find the right person and there are no guarantees. That's the main reason you should date a long, long time, before committing to anyone. Ask a lot of questions, find out what his values are, his plans for the future. Observe him in social settings, how does he treat other people? Is he well educated, career minded? Can he support a family? Is he lazy or a go getter? Does he drink or do drugs? Does he want children? Does he want a partner in life or is he controlling and selfish? Will he come home from work and sit on the couch and expect you to do everything else, or will he share chores with you? What are his political views, spiritual views.........the list goes on. Ask his friends and family about him. Date at least 2 years before considering marriage. Don't have sex before your wedding night.
2007-12-22 04:19:59 · answer #1 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have wondered those same questions many a time when I'm feeling low. Just because it was you're decision to end things doesn't mean that you won't still hurt. Just try to keep positive and busy to keep you're mind off him. If you only split up 3 months ago then it sounds as if he is on the rebound and it's bound to end in disaster. But please, keep the faith. I believe that you CAN meet somebody that wants the same things as you and that you can build a proper life together. The last thing you want to do though is go rushing into anything before you are ready. I ended things with my boyfriend and it took a full year to get over him. I hurt a lot but I knew I had made the right decision. Give yourself time to get your life back on track and then just enjoy it. Above all, keep the faith and know that one day you will meet the right guy.
Merry Christmas x
2007-12-22 12:22:18 · answer #2 · answered by Chief 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I've been divorced since July. Two months after the legal separation he had a new girlfriend and they've been together ever since. I'm past it all, and I'm basically over him, but I can't shake the jealousy and the envy that he's been able to move on so quickly...that I was obviously so easy to get over. Part of the problem is that I've got no one in my life to divert my attention from the situation...like he does. But I'm also not ready to just "replace him" with another person...like he's obviously been able to do.
Have I lost my faith in love...yeah. But that's something I have to deal with, and change on my own. So, until I've been able to get past being so hung up on what HE'S doing with his life...I've accepted that no other relationship will work for ME right now, because I can't give someone else 100% of me yet.
2007-12-22 12:19:37 · answer #3 · answered by LolaCorolla 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It happens to a lot of people. You want them to be as miserable as you are, and to you he doesn't seem to be that way. Sorry to break it to you, but this someone new has probably been around for a while- much longer than 3 months.
I have been in your place, and it seemed like nothing would ever go right. Give it time- it will. When you find someone whom you truly love (how could you plan a life with someone whose behavior you couldn't tolerate?) you will know why it is worth it. For now just enjoy being able to do what you want, when you want. Learn what you love- and you will find someone who loves you for it! Trust me on this one!
2007-12-22 12:14:31 · answer #4 · answered by KD 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the first place what you had most likely wasn't love. Nobody loves someone and marries someone else in 3 months. Just doesn't happen. Not sure what you did have but it wasn't LOVE
2007-12-22 12:38:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Better to find out now that you were not compatible then to later and go through a terrible divorce. Hold your head up and don't even mention him to anyone. Move on
2007-12-22 12:18:44 · answer #6 · answered by dd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋