My boyfriend's wife keeps asking whether he wants to see the kids for Christmas and he doesn't reply. Won't she get the hint?
Is this another red flag for me?
2007-12-20 13:28:46 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Christmas
WTF??!! what kind of douche bag is he??!! why wouldn't u want to see ur own kids???
2007-12-20 13:32:33 · answer #1 · answered by Hooting and Howling. 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Won't SHE get the hint? When will YOU get the hint? ANY guy who does not respond to a question about whether or not he is going to see his own children on Christmas is a POS loser jerk. But then, that may be what you two have in common. How can you even have any feelings for someone like that! Ei yi yi.
YOUR red flag? LOL! It's a match made in ...somewhere.
2007-12-20 13:33:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
This is often a situation amongst families. The father/mother has children from a prior relationship and does not want to see the kids or doesn't have the time,etc etc. Perhaps it is the children who want to see the father an if they are old enough to understand that. Or maybe the mother wants the dad to be part of the kids life. I mean in all honesty here,if he doesn't want to see his kids for the holidays it shows sure signs that if you were in the predictiment where you two have children and it doesn't work out between you two,he might not want to see his children (although not always the case)but think how that would make you feel,or your children. He should at least reply to the ex. Let her understand why he doesn't want to see his children or why he cannot. It is unfair to the children,children did not ask to be here,so why should we neglect them. The fact is he must be open with his children if they are old enough to be spoken to about these things. He is a grown man who should tell his ex,look I do not want to bother with the children anymore,or I would like to see the children but perhaps work out some sort of visitation if one is not already established. He had children with this woman and she feels he should see his kids,spend time with them,is she wrong? You should sit him down and talk to him. Ask him some questions on how he feels about the whole situation,about whether he wants to see his kids or not. The usual excuse is " I don't want to deal with my ex" In any case,unless the children are to young to speak for themselves he should speak directly to the children if he doesn't want to speak with her which is fine as long as the children can go back and forth and communicate openly about wants and needs etc etc. See what he says to you about the situation,and let him know and understand how you feel,even though the children are not yours,this could be you one day and you want to know the reality of what will be if you and him ever have children. Will you be the ex and getting no response when asking if he will visit with his children for the holidays or anyday for that matter? If he wants his kids in his life he should make time for them and spend the holidays with them,if he doesn't care then he needs to be honest wit himself,you and his children.
2007-12-20 13:54:14 · answer #3 · answered by Himynameis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Red flag??? YES. Why are you wasting your time with a man who can't even seem to be committed to his kids. I think it's fair to judge a persons character, and this guy doesn't seem to have good character. If he treats his kids like this, how do you think you're going to be treated by him when he doesn't want to be bothered by you anymore?
I'm kind of concerned that you are even asking if he should see his kids on Christmas. When you were a kid, would you have liked to seen your father on Christmas (and on a regular basis)?
"My boyfriend's wife"???? Bright red flag.
I don't know how serious the two of you are, but please don't ever have kids with this guy. Seriously, if you are sleeping with him, I think you should have your tubes tied or he should have surgery. In my opinion if you ever have kids with him and he's a deadbeat dad with them... you are just as responsible because you knew what kind of guy he is.
"Won't she get the hint?"
I think she probably gets the hint, but she probably knows how much the kids would like to be with their father, especially on Christmas. You can't blame her for trying.
2007-12-20 14:19:02 · answer #4 · answered by plebes02 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MAJOR red flag -- he doesn't care to see his kids at Christmas and she's even offering? He could lose his kids because of this. I worked in law for a lot of years (not an attorney) but he's not even showing interest.....not a good sign.
2007-12-20 13:34:41 · answer #5 · answered by butterfliesRfree 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the previous two answers. Just the fact that you said your "boyfriend's wife" is red flag #1. The fact that he fathered a child and doesn't care to spend time with it makes him a real loser.
Why waste your time with this guy?
2007-12-20 13:34:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Personally, for me, any man that is avoiding taking care of his children, especially on Christmas is a big LOSER! Even the worst dead beat dads show up for this yearly yule celebration. I would run for the hills! You don't want to be her in the future having to explain that daddy doesn't want to have them for Christmas and won't call back. How sad for those kids!
2007-12-20 13:33:27 · answer #7 · answered by glassesguru 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Boyfriend's wife. How many red flags does it take.
2007-12-20 13:31:53 · answer #8 · answered by Lord of Chaos 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend's wife? There is your red flag.
2007-12-20 13:32:10 · answer #9 · answered by FL Sunshine 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If he doens't drop everything that he is doing to go see his kids than he isn't a man...and yes ...you should run like hell out of that relationship... If he isn't gonna take care of his wife or his kids..he won't take care of you
2007-12-20 13:39:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If your boyfriend has a wife, you have another issue going on and i think you should worry about that one first
2007-12-20 13:31:54 · answer #11 · answered by Mr Scott 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋