i don't have any money, i am 17, my parents had him arrested for assault. and now he is in county jail. i don't want him there because we love each other and no one sees it. they only see my black eye and swollen cheek and begin to freak out. i really need help to get him out. he don't deserve this treatment. can anyone help me and him?
2007-12-20 12:22:29 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
First thing you should do is explain to your parents, try to get them to understand the way you think, and if he gave you a black eye and a swollen cheek, that's not ok. You both need to talk it out, and settle this mess out, and if you love him you will.
2007-12-20 12:29:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
FIRST OF ALL... YOU do NOT deserve to have a black eye and swollen cheek from a boyfriend who "really loves you". If he really loved you then he wouldn't DARE lay a hand on a woman he loves. It's definitely best that he's in there. There are girls who's boyfriends were arrested for assault, the guy played mind games and apologized saying he'd never do those things again, they forgave him and eventually ended up getting killed in a domestic violence dispute. You could only bail him out if you have money anyway.
2007-12-20 12:33:31 · answer #2 · answered by jenna 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he gave you a black eye and a swollen cheek, but he doesn't deserve to be in jail...do you deserve to be hit by a boyfriend who claims to love you? no, you don't.
perhaps you are the type of person who must experience a situation before you can learn from it, and that's valid, but i'll say this: love doesn't equal black eye. frankly, if someone gave my kid a black eye out of anger, i'd freak out and have him arrested too.
perhaps some time in jail would be good for him. if you bail him out, you're basically saying, 'it's okay to hit me sweetie. i'll even give you money!' if that's what you want to say, have a bake sale. if that's not what you want to say, then walk away.
2007-12-20 13:35:19 · answer #3 · answered by Julie N 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you deserve your black eye and swollen cheek? Think about and remember how violated you felt when he struck you. Would you want a child of yours to experience the same feelings? Your parents did the right thing.
2007-12-20 12:44:46 · answer #4 · answered by ≤ Flattery Operated © 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm assuming you want attention for even wanting a guy who hits you but really, do you hate yourself that much that you are willing to loose your self respect to an asshole that hits you? What your parents did was the right thing but you need to realize that you have a problem if you think that is what love is. You need to get counseling or something because you'll just keep getting abused by men over and over. That is not love and I hope you are smart enough to know what he did was wrong.
2007-12-20 12:27:49 · answer #5 · answered by Dragon Spider 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need an adult (18+) and they have to go to a bail bondsmen. Whatever the amount of the bail is, someone is going to have to fork over 10% or some type of collateral to get your bf out. But your bf may get out on "O.R". if this is his first offense. Wait a few days so he can go before the judge. No use wasting money if he's gonna be out soon anyway.
2007-12-20 12:27:17 · answer #6 · answered by Nikki S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to bail him out? He will just do it again, and again, and again, until he gets around to killing you.
I worked in a large city Emergency room for too long, and it made me sick! Every week or two the same women would come in beaten and bloody, their husband or "significant other" got paid, got drunk, and "punished" these women for some offense only the drunk could see. We would treat their wounds, offer them assistance in getting away (refused) and resign ourselves to seeing the same people again next payday.
Your folks are right, leave that turkey in jail and find someone who deserves your love!
2007-12-20 13:57:46 · answer #7 · answered by ornery and mean 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that's all they see they have a big problem. They should see what it will do to you later. Now about bailing him out, Let you parents know what you pan to do so that your dad has ample time to observe the legal 10 day wait for purchasing a handgun.
2007-12-20 12:27:34 · answer #8 · answered by Neescousin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He deserves to be in jail and you deserve a man not a little boy who beats up on his girlfriend. I am sorry I sound so mean but I saw this happen with my oldest sister she dated several guys that beat her and once I saw her with a black eye. If I had been the age I am now I would have shot that low life. She was actually 17 when this began to happen to her and she ran off and got married to this guy. Well long story short he keep being mean to her and abusing her she keep thinking he would stop and that he just needed help. Well he needed to be put away but never was. She one day saw that he was never going to change and she left him, thank God!! Then some years later she was with another guy who did about the same then one day he pulled a gun on her when they were having an argument. Thank God he didn't kill her but he did beat her up some. She left that jackass as well but then about 2 years latter went back to him because he said he had changed and like a fool she believed him. Well I was 20 at that time and I went and had a one on one talk with him. I told him they were both adults and I could care less what they did, but if my nephew was ever hurt, or if I ever heard of him pulling a gum on her again I would come and kill him myself and that being in jail for the rest of my life was not something I wanted but I was willing to do to protect my sister. He never did pull a gun on her again but he did yell at her and make her feel like crap. One day she realized that he also would never change and left him. She is much much better now. I told you this because I know you have feelings for this guy, but sweetheart he will hurt you more I promise once he is out and you and him are back together. You can not change him and he will not change believe me, I've seen it happen to many time with my sister and some of my friends. You should leave him and get away from him. It will be the best thing for you. No woman deserves to be hit or yelled at and talked down to, know one deserves that!! Please get rid of him and don't put yourself and your parents through what my family had to go through, please. A real man, who really does love you will never hit you. Yeah everyone argues from time to time but most do not talk down to each other and verbally abuse each other. He will abuse you and have you so scared by the time you see what he is really like that you will become to afraid to get away from him. Not all men are like that, many of us are nice, warm, loving people who will love and respect the woman we are with. You should let him be and let him go his way. You will be better off and you will find a man who is much, much better to you and will show you love and respect which you deserve. I have to say this time I agree with your parents and I know they did the right thing. I wish you could talk to my sister so she could tell you about how it hurt her and her life. I know you might not listen to me, but I pray you do. Please trust me it's for the best if you let him go and stay away from him. If you go back to him you will end up in a true hell on earth. He will act OK for a little while, then he will start doing this again. Then he might apologies or get arrested again. Then he will be OK for a little while to you and then it will start all over again. I hope you will listen to what I'm saying. Believe me for your sake and your family's sake, get rid of him, please.
2007-12-20 12:54:44 · answer #9 · answered by Prof. Dave 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. He needs to stay there. And you need to get a new boyfriend NO WOMAN EVER should have to have black eyes or bruises from a jackass husband/father/boy friend. You need to realize that he is a loser.. and move on. You can do better.. dont waste your life or time with this A hole.. leave him there to rot forever.
2007-12-20 12:26:35 · answer #10 · answered by Abolir Las Farc 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋