Do you fear getting old?

Question

I have a fear of getting old. I'm afraid that I'm going to become bitter with age because I'm a generally unhappy person. I try to keep a positive outlook on life, but the negative always takes over. I'm also an anxious person in general. Basically, I had a rough childhood. I was abused and never made too many friends. Both of my parents have already left this world, and I'm only 27. I sometimes feel very alone even though I have a girlfriend who I love very much. I feel like my past is going to dictate my future, but I truly don't want that.

Answer 1

im not really scared o gettin old cuz were all gunna die sooner or later so its all good

Answer 2

I don't think you're alone in fearing old age. I know lots of people who do, including myself. I have no children and as a woman, statistically my partner in all probability will die before me and I fear being alone.

With both your parents dead and you're only 27, plus the added fact that you had a rough childhood, how would you feel about getting some counselling? When you say you're afraid you'll become bitter with age and that you try to keep a positive outlook on life and also that you truly don't want your past dictating your future, that to me suggests that what you fear will not actually happen because you really don't want it to.

Have some counselling and thrash this all out. You sound like you just need someone to help you head in the right direction.

Good luck with everything. You sound pretty cool.

T., Ireland

Answer 3

You are the ruler of your destiny. If you want to do better you can do better. I do know from experience. I grew up in a very abusive household and have been on my own since the age of 15... Life is what you make of it. So have dreams, set goals and simply go for what you know. If you have some issues from childhood, then go and seek out the assistance of a counselor to help you to work through the issues. There is no shame in that. Look at the blessings in your life, the positives and less at the negatives. Personally, I enjoy getting older and look upon each day as a blessing. With age comes wisdom... Good luck and God bless****

Answer 4

The further you get from your painful past, the easier it will get. You are very young yet and already had far too much to deal with. Its not surprising that you are negative sometimes as thats what life has thrown at you - it doesn't have to be that way forever and you are right to 'count your blessings' in that you have a lovely gf. I think making an effort with friends is also important just in case the love life doesn't last. Friends are usually far better than family because we get to choose them! So, if you want a good future, surround yourself with a few good people who you do trust and care about. These are the people who will share your ups and downs and make sure you don't fall by the wayside.

Answer 5

I just watched A League of Their Own with Madonna, Rosie O'Donnell, and Geena Davis. After watching that, yes I fear getting old and being alone. Before, they were young, active, athletic, and bold -- they were amazing females! And, present-time, they've aged and the ending was really sad .... (won't give away the ending...)

I think though, that if your positive and light-hearted, you'll be around good-hearted people. They'll want to be surrounded by your positive nature and it'll be less likely that you'll be alone.

The best thing you could do is EAT RIGHT and EXERCISE. I know some 50+ year-olds that could totally beat me in hiking, biking, swimming, or inline skating and I'm 25! (I know, not a good sign for me.) But I admire their will to stay young - and they look amazing!

Answer 6

Your past can certainly influence your future, but you are still the captain of your ship (at least your inner ship). There isn't much you can do about the world, but you can change your attitude. Why worry about how you will be when you grow old when it's today you're throwing into the toilet. What a waste of life, young man! You are alive and you have someone you love and more importantly, someone who loves you. When you are my age (66), will you look back and say, "Where did it all go and what did I do with it?" or say, "It's been a good life. I can die happy, but I hope I am blessed with another thirty years with this woman I love."
May God bless you with wisdom and may your life be full and happy so you won't end up an old man filled with nothing but regrets!

Answer 7

Sorry if I'm blunt, but this is how I feel.

You've had a shitty life, that stinks, I'm sorry. But whatever you do in this life, no matter what it is, will always affect everyone else's life.

Do your best to keep your past your past. Make the most with what you have, and be the best you can be. Do what you can to make other people happy, advocate for and protect others from the things you've suffered from.

You've been through a lot, and you can help a lot of people. Helping others and making a difference will keep you happy. Your past does dictate your future, but only in the way you let it.

Take care.

Answer 8

I live in Florida. Where there is a LOT of elderly people - everywhere! MOST always looked to me to be in really bad shape. By age 35, I had enough of worrying, so I started weightlifting. I am now age 56, almost age 57. After 24 years of exercising; stretching, aerobics, light weight lifting, heavy weightlifting, I am nothing like other men my age. I am big, strong, healthy and happy. I plan to work until age 80, live until age 120. Aging can be two different paths; one with pain and fear, the other with strength and positive outlook on life. Exercise gives you that choice. Google Jack and Elane LaLanne. They both are in their 90's and are in fantastic shape. Aging does not have to mean growing old.

Answer 9

Trust me--there is nothing to fear. Live in the present. If you live in the past--you will miss some of the present. Also--as you age--your senses become a little numb. Just take one day at a time and live it to the fullest. I am there--do not fear it. Do not let the past rule your life. I am so sorry for your childhood though. Hugs to you and good luck. Just keep a smile on your face.

Answer 10

You are not alone...I've been through the same thing & almost always feel the same way. .Only I am alot older than you. My mother is still here but I dont speak to her. Are you an only child? If not try talking to one of your siblings...My sister & I used to talk about our horrible childhood all the time. She recently past this Nov. & now I feel all alone, only because no-one understands what I (we) went through as kids...If you are an only child that makes things that much harder. (try to find someone-anyone) who will listen to you. You stated you have a girlfriend you love very much.This is a good thing. As long as she loves you back & you feel comfortable around her thats all that matters. .Try talking to her. The pain from your childhood will never completely go away. It takes years and years of hard work on your part to deal with those horrible memories.
I know. I'm still working on it! Good Luck to you!

Answer 11

I am already old in your book because I am 70. Although my bones are creaking I still do what I use to do when I was 60 or younger except I have a problem walking because of injuries I have had in life.
I even had a liver transplant 4 years ago and have found a boyfriend about 18 months ago.
So, enjoy life and don't worry. You'll find life much better if you can do that.