my and my bf have been off and on for 8 yrs we are young have 2 kids. we had a 5 month break at that time we only had 1 child. during our break he slept with 2 ppl. it bothers me and i cant get the thought outta my head. He had never been with anyone before me and i loved that it made it special. he says he regrets it but i dont believe him. i think it might bother me also cuz i have low self confidence cuz i look nothing like these girls, my body is far from perfect since having my 2nd child. any advice on how to get past it? is it normal 2 feel this way even though we werent together?
2007-12-20 08:38:59 · 15 answers · asked by Crystal 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sometimes i think maybe he got back with me cuz he didnt want 2 be alone?
2007-12-20 10:46:24 · update #1
I've been there too, the only advice I can give is to focus on the present. Live here and now, not there and then, it'll ruin you and your relationship. Don't hold on to things you can't change. Think of this way, he slept with those other people but he came back to you and the two of you had another baby, those girls don't have that. You have him because he wants and loves you for who you are, not them. Time will take care of this, but try to focus on what you have with him right now.
2007-12-20 08:44:48 · answer #1 · answered by justwondering 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you guys were each other's first then you are going to have a hard time with this. You feel like he took some special place away from you, when in reality he hasn't. You will always be his first, but not his only. If you two were on a "break" I can only hope that you possibly discussed whether or not you were going to attempt to get back together later. If you had split, and then eventually got back together then you had to realize the risk of him doing that while you were apart. If you are unhappy with the way you look then only you can do something about that. If you are fine and he isn't happy with the way you look then again, only you can do something about it, but at least you can opt to make your body better or simply leave. The choice is yours, but find comfort and confidence within yourself, and then seek confidence within a relationship with someone else.
2007-12-20 16:45:24 · answer #2 · answered by No one 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Women need a reason to have sex, Men Just need a place. Don't act as if there was any emotion involved. He got his rocks off and that was it... Besides, I would never commit to anyone that I was there first and only... That only sets you up for the line "I've never been with anyone else, I feel like I've missed out" Now that he's had 2 girls added to the list, you won't get that line...Good luck
2007-12-20 18:03:03 · answer #3 · answered by Dr. Whats his name 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I just don't understand how people can not see they are being selfish. You took a "break" from the relationship so then you took the chance that something might happen. If you didn't want something to happen then you should not of taken a "break". The next time you are thinking about taking another "break" then remember that it just might not be a good idea because "stuff" can happen.
2007-12-20 16:48:29 · answer #4 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well that should have been something you discussed during the break. Since you didn't discuss it and didn't ask him not to how was he suppose to know. But i do see how you would feel that way but you have to find a way to deal with it or just move on. You don't want to still feel this way years from now.
2007-12-20 18:52:23 · answer #5 · answered by Felicia *Proud Mommy Of 2* 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, if you were on a break...............sounds pretty normal. Just remember that sometimes sex means only sex. Isn't necessarily an emotion thing for guys. I can't picture myself going five months without. LOL
He probably shouldn't have told you about the others though. His bad for doing that.
2007-12-20 16:45:13 · answer #6 · answered by michael w 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You are not married and you decide to break up for 5 months. So, you shouldn't feel the way you do.
2007-12-20 16:49:36 · answer #7 · answered by CatNip 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
So when you have a fight he goes out and sleeps with others>
Does this sound acceptable> How about if he gets 1 of them preg=== or catches some thing and gives it to you>This is what you want>Your choice>
2007-12-20 16:46:14 · answer #8 · answered by 45 auto 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you really shouldnt worry about it any longer...its in the past ...he is back with you now because he wants to be with you and no one else.
and for your own self esteam why dont you join a gym for your own health and wellbeing...it will make you feel so much better about yourself.
2007-12-20 16:47:00 · answer #9 · answered by jess 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is your BF not your husband. The problem is yours.
Men do not regret sex unless they get an STD from it.
2007-12-20 16:43:11 · answer #10 · answered by CarbonDated 7 · 3⤊ 3⤋