so me and my mom can not get along. she has a need to control and a need to prove that she is better then i am, which she does by trying to get me to completly loose me cool. she knows she can get me like that if she touches my journal (i'm a poet, my journal contians my entire soul) my music (the only thing besides my best friends capable of calming me down) or by dissing my friends. so she does that all the time and i end up having to storm out of the house so i don't literally beat the living crap out of her. but when i leave, even though i tell her that im just going for a walk to cool off and will be back in ten minutes and dont take anything with me, she calls the cops and tells them im a runaway. the same cop always comes and he always takes my moms side since shes small with big eyes, fragile looking and crying, while im muscular, in all black, and look like the deffinition of an uncontorolable teenager. he said next time my mom calls, he's going to take me to juvie.
2007-12-20 05:25:49 · 26 answers · asked by LmeL 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
and i have somehow managed to convince myslef that that would be no big deal even though i wouldn't last 2 seconds, so i need someone to scare the s h i t out of me about what it's really like, thanks
2007-12-20 05:26:55 · update #1
and don't say we should get counsling, we've tried, it dosn't work. all the therpistis are like oficer powerhungry (thats what i call him in my journal, i have no clue what his real name is)
2007-12-20 05:28:05 · update #2
wrong- i looked it up cuz i didnt belive him. if i dont have consent to leave, im a runaway.
2007-12-20 05:31:42 · update #3
ha ha ha sry i proabably should have mentioned that im a girl. just really strong fro anybody my age (14)
2007-12-20 05:32:29 · update #4
nope. i have to stay in juvie at least till my dad can come from virginia to bail me out. im in michigan. thats an 11 hr drive and i know i need to respect her. what im saying is i can't control myslef. when you mess w/ what i've brought into my circle, it takes evry ounce of self control i have not to make blood spatter all over your face, wheather your my mom, officer pwerhungry or my math teacher
2007-12-20 05:35:11 · update #5
im a fuc king high school freshmen. i have four more years of this sh it
2007-12-20 05:39:10 · update #6
to the dude who said my mom drinks, you just made me laugh so hard i had to go throw up again (home sick) i used to drink, take pills, smoke pot, shack up with my boyfriend etc. but thats all the past. when i started high school this year (yup i lost my virginity before i was 14. im a slow learner) i decided to change. i havn't touched alcohol in 3 months and 15 days and i dont think my mom ever has.
2007-12-20 05:42:39 · update #7
just one more thing: a lot of people post fakes on here all the time and my story i think is more unbelivable then a lot of the ones that hae been called out. but its obvious im not lying by my responses, proper spelling, and how into this i am. just a word to al those liars
2007-12-20 05:47:07 · update #8
You wanna know what Juvie is like. It's cooled they stripp you down completely and spray you with bleach. The second you walk in to the cells people are yelling fresh meat and I can't wait for shower time. They lock you in a cell with two other people who were yelling this. Then you have to give up your underwaer because you might hang yourself by them. Then they would take anything you had. You like to write so do I and thats what they take I nearly went crazy. The food is disgusting and sometimes you find hair in them. Trust me you do not want to go
2007-12-20 06:19:10 · answer #1 · answered by Kaos_Emo_Chick_4_life 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You look like someone who will go far in life if you work for it. You're a poet, and a musician; you seem really creative. Going to juvie will probably stop all chances of a great future. Remember, it isn't just what'll happen to you now; I'm sure others will tell you how much it would suck to go to jail and what it's like, but thinking about what you want to do later on is important.
Also, you should probably talk to a different trusted adult about what your mom is doing to you and find a way to resolve this problem; the way she's controlling you with the sympathies of a cop isn't right at all. I'm sure she just wants the best for you in some warped sense, but she's going about it the wrong way.
If you can stop her from doing crazy stuff with a trusted adult's help, then that's the best solution. Because I don't think you'd be able to just put up with all the s*** she's been giving you for an extended period of time.
2007-12-20 05:33:55 · answer #2 · answered by retired_dragon 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For actual Juvie, I don't think they can just put them in there without having it approved by family court or a judge. To some extent, parents of teenagers have to accept that there are certain misbehaviors most teenagers participate in at least once (including sneaking out). If there's only one misbehavior, or if it isn't an extended incident, I don't think the justice system would appreciate Juvie being used to take difficult teenagers just because the parent doesn't want to deal with the issues of raising teenagers. There are homes and programs your friend's mom can try to send her to, but if she doesn't have any real documented behavioral problems, it's not likely it will work, simply because the waiting lists for those places are usually long, and slots are filled based on need, not just an upset parent. I grew up in a small town with a really respected home for disturbed or problem children, and the kids were usually drug users, truent, kids who dealt with anger and fighting issues, usually they had a history of vandalism, many were promiscuous, etc. They got one warning when it came to slip-ups at the home. If they attempted to run away, or if they tried to go back to their old way of life, they were kicked out. There were kids who needed it and would take advantage of the benefits the program can offer them.
2016-04-10 09:49:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do as you have done, as far as leaving, and not being violent but quit being so easily upset. The next time your Mom calls the cops without reason, charge her with "making a false report". To manage it, when you leave-after a fight-leave her a note telling her where you will be. Then go somewhere like a Library where no one can object to you being. Keep your actions, and words, under control, or you will be charged with being "beyond parental control", and sent to juvie, and then reform school...both of which are like jail/prison. You won't enjoy getting gang raped, beaten regularly, having your journal shredded, etc, in Juvie...so it's best to avoid it. No matter how big/strong/tough you are there is someone at Juvie who is bigger/tougher...especially when there will be 50 people pounding on you together. Your friends deserve to be dissed, and being dissed is part of life. Grow up, and deal with it. Stop losing your cool. Once you end up in juvie, you are ten times more likely to end up in jail as an adult,and eventually getting killed either by cops at crime scenes, or by other prisoners in lockup.
2007-12-20 05:40:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude, I know how you feel, at least on some bits. As far as your journal goes, I had to just quit putting things down in mine.. It was a huge blow, but if you don't want people to know, you have to keep it in your head. I've started using a password protected file on my personal laptop, but after having my privacy invaded so many times, I'm still pretty wary.
On the music, use headphones, and when she disses your friends, ignore her. I don't have her version so I don't really like to take sides, but she sounds ignorant and a control freak on that front.
As far as juvie goes, I know it isn't what you are looking for, but you could probably handle it. You aren't out of control, and a lot of the kids their are just brats. My step sister works at a juvie det., and she jokes about how ticked she'll be if she gets beat up by a twelve year old, but it isn't prison.
However, the thing you need to ask yourself is if you can handle having it on your record. That sure isn't something you want following you.
The system is against you at the moment. Play the game until you can get out, and then you'll be free to be yourself on the outside as wellas the inside.
2007-12-20 05:37:18 · answer #5 · answered by Jes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I never been to juvie, but I've heard many horror stories about it.
***I went to adult jail because of a misunderstanding-not my fault. & I spent a night & a day there, & they treat you LITERALLY like a DOG. They feed you 2, not 3, SMALL meals/day that are fattening & unhealthy. 1 small pack of those little Jimmy Dean sausage biscuits for breakfast (2 tiny sausage biscuits) & 1 miniature chicken pot pie for dinner. They serve you through a little peephole & treat you like you're living in a doghouse. NOT a good feeling! You sleep on unsanitary bunk beds with no pillow or blanket, they take all your belongings away from you, you can't take a shower, there's really no soap, & the sink is RIGHT above the toilet. DISGUSTING! They literally starve you. You'll want to have a nervous breakdown. & imagine-if I was convicted of the "so-called" crime that I did NOT commit, then they were gonna have me in prison for 10 YEARZZZZ! & they said people beat you up & gang rape you, & the cops just sit there & laugh like it's the Dave Chappelle show or something. So try your best NOT to drop the soap while taking a shower.
The police officer probably lied, just to scare you. How about just going in your room & listening to some relaxing music, take a nap, read, use Y!A, talk to a trusted friend, or perhaps tell a trusted family member what your mom is doing. Honestly, if you leave the house & get falsely accused of running away, it's safer & you won't do as much jail time as if you were to hit your mom. Seriously. Assault is more punishable than a runaway. Running away-you might be in juvie for like a day. If you hit your mom, you'll be there longer. Besides, many people always say to remove yourself from a stressful situation to prevent problems from escalating & doing something you regret.
***Another thing to consider. Handcuffs are tighter than your wrists, & they leave cuts & bruises. Also, it's a pain. Imagine METAL squeezing your BONE-no kidding. I'm not overexaggerating. & also, it's almost impossible to walk, & it gets tighter & hurts worse & worse every time you move. Then, they put you in the back of the police car, & it feels like as if you're in the back seat of a regular car, & you're tall with long legs, & the person sitting in the front seat in front of you is tall with long legs & scoots back, while you're all cramped up. It's HELL!
Here's a toll-free crisis # to call when your mom is not around. 1-800-448-3000. Boys & Girls Town National Hotline. OR talk to your school counselors & teachers & tell them to intervene, & they might get child protection services on her @$$.
2007-12-20 05:50:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are in a tough spot.
I am sorry that your mother tends to invade your privacy. My advice is not going to cater towards scaring the crud out of you in order to avoid juvie... but rather trying to give you a clear conscious in case you end up there.
My advice is to be honest in your actions. Believe me I come from a controlling mother myself and she would always use scare tactics to set me "straight"... where an honest answer would have been more suffice. Now I am here as an adult, I have a professional career as an artist, I have traveled, sent myself through school,and put myself on my own path. Yes, it was (and still is) hard, but focusing on my own endeavors, and using common sense has been more beneficial in the long run than to give in to others POV to what they believe is right. And through experience and trial and error I can definitely say SCARE TACTICS DO NOT WORK. You know what is right and what is in your best interest. I am not saying defy autrority and your elders, but there is a time to be selfish and to take control of what essentally brings you happiness all while remembering the consequences for your actions. Remember this in the words of Bob Marley...
"For ever little action.... there is a reaction"
Sometimes life isn't fair.... but if you can walk away from each experience and learn something from it.... well you have done well.
Best of Luck.
2007-12-20 05:46:47 · answer #7 · answered by Intrigued??? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My sister is a corrections officer for the juvenile hall system. She's at a center now for kids who are not as dangerous as the other kids. Juvie would not be fun. You can't do anything on your own. You have people watching you 24/7. They can search your items whenever they want, they can search you, there's always another kid looking for a fight, the food is horrible, the clothes are ugly, you still have to go to school and do homework and if you talk back you just get in more trouble. There's nothing good about it!
2007-12-20 05:31:55 · answer #8 · answered by Precious 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My advice would be to first "calm down". Don't let anything bring you to an uncontollable stance in your mind. You can control your anger by yourself. I would suggest you join Alcohol Anonymous's family group. Alanon. Call the AA group and tell them you need help to deal with problems your Mom is creating for you. Do this before you get in trouble with the cops and get a juvie record. Not good for the job resume, you know. Not good for college either. So get a grip and help yourself to understand what's going on. It all relates around your Mom's drinking, and nothing more. You may be better off living with another adult relative if you can. Call and see if you can get the help you need. Good Luck
2007-12-20 05:36:44 · answer #9 · answered by FILE 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I'll scare the s h i t out of you. These are 5 reasons why you don't want to go to juvie:
1. Do you want to be someones b i t c h
2. Kids like to fight, are you a tough fighter?
3.I think that goes on a criminal record.
4.If you can't take your mom on what the hell makes you think that you are going to stand against thieves and kids who actually hit there mom.
5. It's dangerous kids in juvie know how to make shanks.
Hope i scared you, number 1 should have got you.
2007-12-20 05:35:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋