I recently lost my baby girl during birth this past August. The umbillical cord was tightly wrapped around her neck 2x. I have been devasted & depressed since my lost. I have an older daughter who's 18 months. The doctor's told me to wait 6 months. My husband's been VERY desperate & impatient to have another child because it feels SO empty not holding our daughter and doing so much that we've done with her oldest sister. I believe I am pregnant because I skipped my period and I've been having all the symptoms. I think I'm 3-4 months pg as my tummy's a round bump. I guess my hubby got what he wanted and I am lost feeling so guilty and undeserving. I'm scared to see the doctor's because of what they will tell me. Do you know anyone who's gone through such an experience with stillbirth or misscarriage and had gotten pregnant again right after? And what were the results of their pregnancy? I think the docs are more worried about the c-section wound (the insides) healing. I need answers....
2007-12-20 04:26:50 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Well now you're talking to the right person...because you and I are REALLY similar. Well except for the fact that I got pregnant 6 WEEKS after we lost our daughter Violet to the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck at 36 weeks April 2007, although I did deliver Violet vaginally. What I found was that I was showing MUCH sooner then 4 months...actually it was about 1 1/2 months since my uterus never actually went down. And the doctor didn't actually say anything but she did wag her finger at me.
SO far she's doing great...(knock on wood) and no real problems so far. Although IT IS SOOOO STRESSFUL, there isn't a day you don't worry that it will happen again. I go to the doctor for every little thing and she's very nice about it. But since we just lost our Angel Violet we have been going to the doctor for our regular appointments every 2 weeks instead of 4...and next week we start weekly because we both agree that she should be very closely monitored.
Fortunately we did find out that this one does have the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck early...we're waiting to see if it comes undone or we'll have to have a c-section early before she drops. It's hard but it has helped...since we still don't have children. We miscarried at 20 weeks a few years prior to Violet. I've named a bunny Violet for this one, because I do want her to know someday that she would have had a sister. The thing is you appreciate your baby more when you know the pain of losing something so special.
When I gave birth to Violet I actually never stopped the folic acid or prenatal vitamins which was lucky. At the time I wasn't in the mood to even look at food but I still needed to recover so it was just for me. We actually didn't plan on trying again so soon...but it was the first time we had been allowed to have sex since we lost her and neither of us was thinking about condoms.
It's also a little harder on your body since it's probably not had a lot of time to recover what it lost from the first baby. My teeth are a little more sensitive and my back wasn't what it used to be. So the aches and pains are a little more intense and come on earlier then most other people. But other then that it's something that has helped us...not to forget and stay positive for the future. I figured it's fate...and my little angels looking after us making sure we are able to have more children. I'm just soo sorry someone else had to go through the same thing we did...it's the hardest thing I had to face when I lost Violet. I hope that helps and feel free to email me any time!!
2007-12-20 04:53:12 · answer #1 · answered by Shiningami_Gurl 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Please do not feel guilty. I could never imagine how you feel and my absolutely goes out to you. Another baby will never replace the one you lost but may ease the pain in a way. You have no reason to feel guilty and I am sure any respectable doctor would never be hard on you for becoming pregnant after a devastating loss. Speak to your md and I am sure he can ease any anxiety you have about the wound he may have special instructions for you it being so soon and what not. Know that you have love from your daughter and husband and they will be there for you through this pregnancy and hopefully you can move on in the memory of the your child you lost. No one wants you to forget your baby but no also wants you to feel guilt for giving another life either. Your guilt only comes because your are obviously a loving mother. Best of luck to you and your family and congradulations on your pregnancy.
2007-12-20 12:35:56 · answer #2 · answered by desiwallace24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, my condolences to you and your family..
I miscarried when I was 5 mths pregnant in 2003 and was devastated and overcome with grief. I then became pregnant a month later and now have a beautiful 3 year old..
Take a test to see if you are pregnant and then decide what you will do next. You shouldn't worry about what the doctor thinks as far as judgment, that's not what a doctor is for.
Good luck to you and yours..
2007-12-20 12:41:32 · answer #3 · answered by Bella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lost my second child during pregnancy ( a little boy). This was very devastating to us. I was also told to wait at least 6 months, however I ended up pregnant 3 months later. That was 10 years ago, I had a beautiful daughter. I now have four children not including the one I lost. We named him Angel, he was cremated I have never looked at his ashes to this day. I just think how lucky I am to have the four healthy ones I do.
2007-12-20 12:35:10 · answer #4 · answered by telulah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well my mil has a still birth I dont know exactly how long but it wasnt long after that she got pg with my husband. And he went full term and came out fine with no complications. And I have had 5 m/c in the last 2 years and am waiting to find out if I am pg right now. I am scared too. I dont even want to test. But I am sure that everything will be fine. My husband came out just fine.
2007-12-20 12:40:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first i just want to give u and Ur husband my condolences. I'm SO Sorry! your a VERY strong woman! I on the other had miscarried in April & 3 months. And i was able to concieve a month later. You shouldnt worry about what ur drs what will say...they are there to help you not judge u!
good luck hun
2007-12-20 12:32:44 · answer #6 · answered by Lils 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IM soso sorry, You are going through alot right now, if your pregnant to be ashamed cause your doctor cant judge you he has to do the best for you and that is to take care of you and the baby inside you, I wish you luck and I hope that you and your husband get better I will pray for you and the one inside of you, you have my heart and mind on you three and god bless
2007-12-20 12:40:28 · answer #7 · answered by Jaclyn B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your loss! Go see your doctor and have a pregnancy test. Odds are that they may just want to monitor you a little more closely this time around.
Good luck and God Bless!
2007-12-20 12:37:14 · answer #8 · answered by Chele 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
firstly, you couldnt be 4 months as you just lost one 4 months ago.
take a test. find out for sure and head to the doctor
sorry about your loss i know that pain
2007-12-20 12:32:26 · answer #9 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The same happened to my sister.She had a stillborn baby boy and got pregnant straight after.She had a beautiful little girl,no complications so I hope the same happens for you. xx
2007-12-20 12:39:06 · answer #10 · answered by bella 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋