What causes a person to have emotional detachment issues? My boyfriend has no interest in having an emotional connection with me and I've been nothing but good to him, so it's not like he has a reason to be this way. He is like a robot and I'm starting to believe that he doesn't have a soul or a conscience. He doesn't seem to have feelings like normal people do, at least towards me.
His parents seem like nice, normal people and he grew up with 2 sisters (no brothers), so I can't understand why he is the way he is.
I should note that he seems to have emotional closeness with his family and friends, just not with me. I don't understand. It's so easy to put the blame on myself, like I must not be good enough...but in reality, I know it's his problem.
What causes this and what can I do? I've tried to talk to him about it but he tells me he doesn't know what I'm talking about and that I've got a messed up perception of reality. Any advice appreciated. Thanks.
2007-12-20 02:30:42 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
um.. are you sure he has no emotional attachment? Or does he just not show it the way you want him to? We're men, not women and we show emotion in a different way. Sure there is a list of things I can roll off that could be some condition he has... but the most likely answer is that he's just a normal guy who doesn't feel comfortable chatting up how his day went and the likes. So make sure that's not the case before you go off trying to diagnose him.
2007-12-20 02:39:11 · answer #1 · answered by pip 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Usually when a person has emotional detachment issues, it means he has been emotionally hurt and betrayed by others that he allowed himself to get very close to.
A lot of this has do with growing up. Maybe parents got divorced... or parents were abusive. This is obviously not the case... but maybe he was adopted?
Another thing is past relationships. He may have had a problem with getting too attached... and then getting hurt. As a result, he builds this wall around his heart and doesn't let anyone through.
I wish there was an easy answer to this one... but you might want to go to his parents since he won't talk to you. Explain how he treats you... and ask him why he may be this way.
Hope this helps.
2007-12-20 02:39:48 · answer #2 · answered by Peno 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This Site Might Help You.
RE:
Emotional Detachment - What causes this and what can I do?
What causes a person to have emotional detachment issues? My boyfriend has no interest in having an emotional connection with me and I've been nothing but good to him, so it's not like he has a reason to be this way. He is like a robot and I'm starting to believe that he doesn't...
2015-08-18 17:18:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Consult a psychiatrist.
A layman's diagnosis (which is like the guy at the mcdonalds window diagnosing your engine knock):
the guy is a good faker and could be a sociopath without real emotions.
or the guy does have emotional connections with others, but is embarrassed by you, or doesn't want to be vulnerable to you.
He is not normal and you do not have a relationship except in your mind.
Emotional detachment is usually a sign of some serious defect or unresolved emotional issue and requires professional help.
2007-12-20 02:36:44 · answer #4 · answered by Poli Rad 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Emotional detachment can mean two different things. In the first meaning, it refers to an *inability* to connect with others emotionally, as well as a means of dealing with anxiety by preventing certain situations that trigger it; it is often described as "emotional numbing" or dissociation. In the second sense, it is a type of mental assertiveness that allows people to maintain their boundaries and psychic integrity when faced with the emotional demands of another person or group of persons.
If he has healthy emotional relationships with others, sounds like the second meaning. Perhaps he finds you too emotionally demanding; maybe it would be that way in any of his romantic relationships. Perhaps you have inadvertently raised his defenses, or he does not want to be intimate with anyone romantically. If you were "not good enough" I suspect he would have moved on.
Only you and he know the answer to that. If your behavior gives him no reason for this reaction, you will not be able to change it. Only time can. You will have to decide if it's worth the wait.
2007-12-20 03:26:18 · answer #5 · answered by BillyTheKid 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
emotional detachment
2016-01-24 23:11:26 · answer #6 · answered by Edgar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are several causes, something traumatic (to him) psychologically, unlikely. Second, he feels unloved at home, the more his friends and family try, the more he thinks they're insincere and are faking it. He might feel his sisters are loved more, and he gets the scraps. Or it might be a the lazy man's way out of having to interact with people, sort of selfish.
2007-12-20 02:35:43 · answer #7 · answered by Clipper 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
while you say that he has emotional attachment to his parents and emotional detachment to you..then the reason is obvious.......he doesnt want to be hurt later on in your relationship...he knows what he wants and he can predict what will happen too.....I have to believe that he is just being practical to the situation..and if he invests more emotions in your relationship or to be emotionally attached to you, then he knows he will be misplaced and displaced and suffer in the end...........but dont judge him and dont let this register in hsi mind..instead build that gap and find the missing link...get closer to him gradually, he might still be suffering from an emotional black out in the past and that he hasnt recovered......not yet.......or simply he wants things to be simple........not too much emotional and take things very seriously!!!cheer up.......no worries........he will learn the knack of opening to you depeneding on how you deal with him..so good luck!!!
2007-12-20 02:41:44 · answer #8 · answered by E@rthGoddess 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
there are physical and mental possiblities. Without him going to a Psychiatrist for an evaluation there is no way to tell what causes it or how to treat it.
2007-12-20 02:34:44 · answer #9 · answered by Michael B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he is distancing himself from you because he doesn't really like you all that much but probably doesn't feel comfortable enough to break up with you.
2007-12-20 02:35:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋