he keeps telling me, how much he loves me, and i keep wanting to leave, but i cant, because I love him, the only thing thats pushing us apart, is the fact that he tells me one thing and does another. Im tired of crying, and I dont know what else to do. Please help
2007-12-19 17:28:09 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
you can't change him. it would be better if you yourself change. how? tell yourself this..." NOBODY HAS THE RIGHT TO HURT ME" and if he comes around and ask you again. don't say anything just let him be. just be firm with your stand. stay polite and if he leaves , never chase him...take a deep breath and smile! tomorrow is another and you change lifestyle.. keep yourself busy with other productive tasks. love yourself again! stay healthy...cheer up girl!
2007-12-19 19:21:50 · answer #1 · answered by Angelique 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he breaks promises now, it will only get worse after marriage. "Familiarity breeds contempt!" When you are married each partner's faults they had before marriage become magnified. That means if he is a promise breaker now, it will be a hundred times worse then. If he is a liar now, he'll be a worse liar then. Talk is cheap, actions are what count. Some people even use actions to manipulate others. They temporarily change their actions to get others to think they have changed.
If you are tired of crying now, just wait, you ain't seen or experienced nothing yet!
You need to dump this Bozo and chalk it up to experience,( what not to look for in a mate!)
You need a man with "character!" Character is,"Doing the right kind of things when nobody else is looking!"
If this guy had an ounce of respect for you, he would not make promises that he did not keep! I've been married to the same woman for 36 years and would do it all over in a heartbeat! The one thing I've learned in those 36 years is that a successful marriage has it's foundation in trust. I just don't see how you are going to be able to trust this man!
Don't walk away from this relationship,......RUN!
2007-12-19 17:49:12 · answer #2 · answered by wersells 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
particular, i understand...i'm no longer a woman yet I even have many woman associates...some who've long previous with the aid of very comparable circumstances. This relationship sounds like it became doomed from the get flow. guy has accountability subject concerns, mom and dad dislike you and characteristic a undesirable relationship with him, and so on. And the worst area is which you have been completely ignorant of all of this on account which you have been emotionally wrapped up in this guy. each and all of the indications have been there that this guy became no longer good sufficient to deserve you, yet you chosen that path anyhow. I often sense undesirable for you simply by fact of ways issues occurred yet you need to appear on the advantageous here...and that's, you deserve and gets somebody greater suitable. basically take what you discovered here and attempt to prepare this information to a sparkling relationship so as which you would be able to dodge such issues returned sooner or later. yet to your sakes and all human beings in this earth...do no longer take this guy back (as i'm particular you want to...or will want to).
2016-11-23 16:48:56 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When reading your question it was like reading the very same question I have been wanting to post myself. My fiancee does the very same thing! It drives me crazy.
We have set a date for our wedding and changed it three times because I have told him that unless he starts following through I will not marry him. Well I ended up having to cancel the whole darn thing altogether.
It's like they don't see that their behavior is ruining their relationship and possibly their lives and that if they could make a couple simple changes, they could save themselves from the poor, pitiful life they will have to face without us girls!
It makes no sense to me!
Finally I have told myself that it's time to start looking for a job, an apartment...a new place to live. It's sad but I think I will HAVE to go just to save myself from the misery I will face for the rest of my life trying to change some one who just CAN'T change.
So I'm just like you..a sitting duck. I know I want to go but I don't know when. The holidays definitely isn't the right time, especially if there's a child involved.
I'm waiting out the school year so I don't have to uproot her in the middle of a school year at a new school.
You will know when it is the right time to go. You will feel it in your heart as I know I will.
The first step is admitting to yourself that you can't change this man and that it is only fair to move on so that you can find what you really want.
Good Luck!
2007-12-19 18:42:33 · answer #4 · answered by MelT 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A man that can gives u a sense of security can only be regarded as a good man. If you dont want these kind of life to carry on until u r married then better leave him before its too late. There are still alot of good fishes out there. Why did u still wan to eat a rotten fish?
2007-12-19 17:32:47 · answer #5 · answered by Raven 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
hi.. same case happened with me too while back.. look when things don't generally work out.. you must break it up.. a guy actually in love will never want to see you upset or crying.. if he is making false promises, its quite evident and clear he is no more interested in it.. points now:
1. does he always fight with you nowadays?
2. does he always turn up coming late and going early nowadays?
3. Does he always try to avoid you nowadays?
4. Does he ignore your calls or sms too often?
5. Does he not try to make you fine, if he finds you happy?
6. Does he always keeps him engaged on the phone, even when your around?
etc etc..
If these are the signs, trust me you will be even tons happy once your broken up, you could always find someone who is more loving to you. Love can happen. but dont let yourself crying for someone who is not interested in you. I am in no way related to you. But if you can take my advice, PLEASE BREAK UP!! trust me god willing you will have a better life.
2007-12-19 17:34:20 · answer #6 · answered by sameer k 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is probably not the right guy for you. If it is the right person, you shouldn't be crying. You will be crying through the marriage and the divorce. Or worse...you will get tired of crying and become bitter [and you will hate him and yourself for letting him drive you to this].
Love is not enough to sustain a marriage.
Life is short...move on now.
2007-12-19 17:34:53 · answer #7 · answered by brook_6 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to confront him about it and let him know how what he's doing is making you feel. If he's like this as a fiance, imagine what he could be like as a husband. Think about it. You need to sort things out now rather than later.
2007-12-19 17:36:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He isn't going to change--so don't hold your breath waiting for that to happen. It's time for you to sit down and decide whether you can live with him doing that for the rest of your life, or not.
2007-12-19 17:35:05 · answer #9 · answered by ♥Instantkarma♥♫ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Here, I'll decide for you.........
leave him..
and the sun will come up tomorrow and you will live to see it and have a wonderful life once you lose him and find someone who respects you...LOVE doesn't do what he does.
2007-12-19 17:31:30 · answer #10 · answered by sreshowtime 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋