Our son has bronchitis since Sunday. He has had a high fever, vomiting and overall sick. (He has been getting better since he has been on antibiotics since Sunday) I asked my husband to skip his basketball games tonight because I need help. Even tho I love my son a sick toddler is difficult. I begged him to help and stay. His reasoning is that our son will be in bed in an hour so it doesn't matter for him to stay. I am heart broken and he lost a lot in my eyes tonight. Am I wrong for feeling like this?
2007-12-19 13:07:44 · 25 answers · asked by Queen of Kings 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No you are right to feel hurt and angry. That poor sick baby is both of your responsibility. When he gets home you should sit him down and explain to him how he made you feel.
2007-12-19 13:12:18 · answer #1 · answered by sweetrhymez21 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Your child has had bronchitis for 4 straight days? And you're husband left to go to a game?
What is the context? Has hubby been around working his butt off for the past 4 days - and does he just need a break? Has hubby been sick? Has he been putting in a lot of hours at work and need to blow off some steam? Find out all of that first, because if he does have a good reason for needing his time - you could be viewed as the selfish one.
Or has he really been 'out to lunch' this whole time?
If it's the latter I'd seek marriage counseling. That shows some serious lack of empathy and consideration, not just for you, but for your sick child too. If it is the latter your husband should have at least stayed long enough to put your son to bed with you.
My husband has always been there for me when I ask. So much so, that I really take time to consider and make sure I need what I'm asking for, because his answer is always yes.
2007-12-19 13:52:38 · answer #2 · answered by Kristin V 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have every right to be upset. It's not just all up to mom all the time. Dads need to help out to, and if that means skipping out on his plans then so be it. The child's sick and you need help, i'd be hurt to. Child's more important then a basketball game anyday. He's not just hurting you, but the child also. He should be there supporting you, im sure your upset your son's sick. Talk it out with him and tell him when he gets home he really hurt you, see if that does anything. Men are hard headed though. Good luck and i hope your son gets better soon.
2007-12-19 13:17:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are not wrong. My two year old got really sick with the same thing a few months ago. My wife and I had a really hard time because we also have a 6yr old that needed attention as well. Long nights, early mornings, lots of medications. I can't believe your husband. Nothing was more important to me that being close to my family when this was happening. I'm an actor, I skipped every practice that week and was glued to my son. Hopefully you will be able to explain to him how you feel and he can recognize that what he did tonite was very selfish and immature! You and the baby will be in my prayers tonite!
2007-12-19 13:14:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
No you have every right to feel hurt and angry. Your husband should have stayed at home and help you take care of your son. A sick child is more important then a basketball game.
2007-12-19 14:28:34 · answer #5 · answered by Heidi T 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not wrong for feeling hurt. Your husband doesn't seem to be too concerned about how you feel. Is his basketball game more important than you and his son are?? The mere fact that you asked him to stay home and help should have given him a clue. I wonder how he would feel the next time he wants something(??) and you just disregard his need?? Shame on him.
2007-12-19 13:24:50 · answer #6 · answered by zana m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say you were immature and young and overreacting when you say you are "heartbroken." Heartbroken is when you find out your child has leukemia and will die. Heartbroken is when something is permanent. Heartbroken is far different from this minor tiff. That being said, I think your husband is immature. He wants to have a night out with the boys at the game, not stay home with a sick child. You, of course, resent having to carry the whole load, even though I am sure you love your child. Why did you marry such an adolescent man? Sounds as though he is still a teenager; just wanting to have his fun. And why are you "begging" him to stay and help? If this is that big an issue for you, you need to make that clear to him and TELL him in no uncertain terms that he needs to stay home and be a father and that you need the help. Grow a backbone! If you are old enough to have sex and have a child, then you are old enough to be an adult and take responsibility for your choices. If he flies out the door to his game, then he is showing that he doesn't give a damn about how you feel or what you think - and then you have to re-evaluate the relationship. Then it becomes your decision as to what you want to do. Divorce the bum and collect child support, or stay and take crap from someone who is immature and doesn't care for anyone but himself.
2007-12-19 13:33:15 · answer #7 · answered by D 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋
I dont think your wrong for hurting and I do understand . I to had lost many tears over my children and illness and my now ex doing things like that.
When they do this well you start to feel that everything is more important that you are. I am telling you, how I felt when I was done that way. I felt like he dump it all on me instead of helping. Which hurts very deep! You feel alone and dont understand any of it. Well you do have every right to feel upset. I very much would to. Now this is my suggestion. When your husband returns home, tell him you two need to talk. Lay it all on the table for him. Now He probally going to fuss over it all. He going to go off on his little trip. But that when you fire back. Tell him how you feel over what he did! Tell him you wont live that way. You need help and its his job. Then ask him , how was tthe game! Was it worth the heartacke he caused you?
He not going to change unless you tell him what things mean to you If you like to chat more I am angelic_dream72 in yahoo chat
2007-12-19 13:23:29 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO of course you are not wrong for feeling that way. That is how you feel and you cannot deny it because someone else may disagree....but when your husband come back tell him how you feel. Just let him know that it hurt you when he left after you asked for him to stay. I mean he can play whenever but when a child is sick you should stay around cuz they dont stay asleep all night....usually....good luck
2007-12-19 13:14:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not wrong for feeling that way. Even if your husband had a point about your son going to bed, his focus should be with you & his son. He should have been supportive of YOU even if his son was going to bed. What he did was insensitive to your needs and didn't show any concern for his son.
2007-12-19 13:19:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's wrong. The point is not what time your son will be in bed. The point is not even that he's sick. The point is that you told your husband that you needed help and he turned his back on you (and his son). He's dead wrong. You two need to talk.
2007-12-19 13:13:43 · answer #11 · answered by CoBo 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋