My husband said he would take me anywhere I wanted to go since he hit me last night. What should I ask for?

Question

Okay, my husband came home very angry last night b/c of things at work and when I asked him what was wrong he hit me, but when I started to cry he apologized and held me and said he would make it up to me by taking me anywhere I wanted to go. He said we could go out to eat or he could take me to a store and buy me something. I'm so excited b/c I usually don't have this kind of oppurtunity!! I don't know want to ask for too much or else he might not offer this again, you know? But I do want to do something fun or get something nice!!! What should I choose?

P.S.- My husband wasn't really at fault b/c he is taking these drugs right now that I think make him more aggressive.

Answer 1

You should ask for a trip to the divorce attorney's office. Do not pass GO ... do not collect $200!

There is NEVER EVER EVER a good excuse for hitting a woman, especially a spouse, girlfriend, relative! The only time a woman gets hit in my book is during a police arrest or self defense measure under extreme duress.

You have made several excuses for him to justify him striking you, so in a way you condone it! You have given permission for him to do it again the next time he has a bad day. If you stay with him I will not feel any pity for you the next time he uses you as a punching bag.

Good luck ... you are going to need it!

Answer 2

My dear, from one woman to another, never ever blame yourself when your husband hit you. that is so wrong of you. Did you ever ask yourself why he is offering to buy you something. Do you know why, well he is guilty and by buying or doing something for you it will make him feel better about himself. And the next time he will say well i buy her something the first time, maybe I will just take her some place new, or buy her something else. Nobody has the right to hit another person no matter what the circumstance are. you must always remember you're his partner, his best friend, his lover, and everything else. When you take that vow it didn't say to be your hitting bag or punching bag, hell no. In my opinion I think you should not accept none of his gifts, because that's call bribing. Just let him know let it be the first and the last time you hit me. and then walk. You'll see what happens next.

Answer 3

I want to say something humorous but the hitting part is throwing me.....you know you're about to get a lot of advise to leave him. I won't (however) be a hypocrite. I've had a fight with my husband and it wasn't the end of the world. We survived and doing great. But you didn't have a fight he hit you?? Forget going somewhere, get it in writing that he'll never do that again. For some reason when you write things down they tend to come to life.
And if you really just want to get out...get a spa treatment sound like you deserve it.
good luck.

Answer 4

I would ask for divorce papers. There is no excuse (drugs included) for him hitting you. The fact that you see this as a positive thing and something to get excited over makes me a little sick to my stomach. I don't know anyone who gets excited about the gifts they'll get after being abused.

Answer 5

When your husband hit you, he crossed the line. For a man to actually hit a woman is strongly indicative that he needs to see a therapist to resolve these anger issues in himself. For you to excuse his actions is NOT helping him. He will do it again and again unless you help him to see the consequences of his actions. Imagine if you struck your child. The child would say "mommy, I forgive you!" but would carry the scar of being hit for many years. You would not have learned anything from the experience, for one that anger when displayed can be emotionally traumatizing and physically traumatizing to others. Sticks and stones break bones. If you cover for your husband, you are not helping him to be a better person. The next time you are hit by the one you love who says he loves you, call the police and have him arrested for battery. Before a court judge, he will have to face the consequences of what he's done, possibly get some court ordered therapy. When we were little, our parents taught us the consequences of our decisions and that made us better people. Don't prevent your husband from being a better person by enabling aggression. He will never become a better person if you block his learning process to make him a stronger person emotionally. Yeah, life hurts. But we don't have to hurt others. That's what God created tears for, and arms to hold you and people to hug you. We do not strike out in pain, for this is a selfish action to bring our pain to others and in doing so, your husband wanted to share it with you. I would not wish my own pain on anyone I loved and if I do, I will be gentle with them. I am a clergy abuse survivor, so I know full well experientially in a different way, how much abuse can hurt. Be well. Please take care of yourself and help him to face his actions. Turn down the dinner. He should take you out to dinner because you are a beautiful person, not because he has guilt about hitting you.

Answer 6

you're being somewhat unreasonable at this element on account which you have enable this development be wide-unfold. you place your infant daughter's desires first and that's solid... yet you enable your husband brush aside those desires and flow away you because of the fact the "in charge" one. You the two had to be in charge and now that she's older, you need to start working jointly or you would be caught in the adventure that your respective roles for the the remainder of your existence. Why not enable him have it slow along with his mom and sister so as that he can save for you, then take your daughter the next day?

Answer 7

A police station! Stop being so 'caught up in the moment', HE BLOODY WELL HIT YOU! It could and possibly WILL happen again.
Don't let those drugs he's taking as an excuse. If you stay and it happens again, next time you may not 'GET UP' afterwards!
Please think about it!

PS - Good drugs DON"T make you aggressive!

Answer 8

I have a great idea for this!

You guys should go to your local funeral planner and purchase side-by-side graves. See, since you'll end up there soon (after this inevitably escalates to regular beatdowns and hospital visits and "I don't know why I keep making him so angry" justifications and eventually leads to your death), you may as well prepare early!


By the way, if this is a joke, you are a horrible human being. There are women who actually A) go through this and B) seriously think that it's ok as long as he "makes up for it after." Ridiculous.

Answer 9

You covered you him> On drugs punched you out> Gave him a pass> There is no excuse for him hitting you> He is being nice as he know he would go to jail> So why wouldn't he be nice>Unless you want this reperted>Leave> If you stay don't complain when it happens again>Don't be fooled>

Answer 10

You need to ask him to you to the court house and you need to get an divorce and thats all you need to ask for any man that hits a woman is a punk and does not deserve any kindness at all or a second chance.