Is it normal for married people to...?

Question

I have friends' parents who have been married for over 30 years. Some of them now sleep in separate bedrooms. Some of them still sleep in the same bedroom, but go to sleep at different hours. Are those things normal, or are they signs that there is no more love in the marriage?

Answer 1

I used to think that it said something about the relationship too, but now that I'm older I've stopped thinking that. My wife and I have been married 21 years, and I don't think we have ever been in a point in our marriage where we have felt more loving, loved, stable, secure, and mutually supported. However, sometimes, my wife goes and sleeps on the couch. She sometimes has symptoms resembling restless leg syndrome (She needs to go see a doctor!) that have worsened as she's aged. Now, in her early 40s, she worries she's going to wake me up moving them too much, so she gets out of our bed. This is only one of the many possible physiological reasons for sleeping separately. I don't think not always sleeping together indicates a lack of love, especially for middle-aged to older people.

Answer 2

I think that when you get older there are a lot of different reasons not to sleep together. For example one might need a hard bed for their back and the other might need a soft one. One might snore and the other can't sleep. There are probably lots of different reasons, but that's all I could come up with.

Answer 3

It's normal. My husband and I sleep in separate rooms because I keep him awake snoring and he wakes up if I roll over and touch him in my sleep. He has a very hard time falling asleep, so I don't want to wake him. We still love each other and yes, we still "get together".

Answer 4

No, it doesn't mean love has disappeared it just means that they value their sleep...

My grandfather has his own bed in a separate room due to snoring....he is a night owl and my grandmother is an early bird.....

My friends husband is on a C-pap and it's too loud for her to sleep.

My other friend her husband works a different shift and comes in really early and he doesn't want to wake her while she is sleeping....

people love to have sleep....it helps us to be nice to each other.....coffee can only get you so far.

Answer 5

Why do you care where other people sleep? My in-laws
slept in seperate beds in the same room because my father-in-law had hip rplacement surgery. They still loved each
other. Sometimes you compromise on the small stuff.

Answer 6

My mom and dad have slept in seperate rooms for as long as I can remember. I actually thought that is how married ppl live. As soon as I got married I was shocked that my hubby wanted in my room lol. My mom says she has feelings for my dad but is not in love with him. They have been together for so long (35yrs) and she said she is too old to start over. I just hope my marriage doesnt turn out that way.

Answer 7

I've only been married 4 years, and we often go to bed at different times. I have trouble staying up late, and my husband doesn't like to go to bed early. We are completely and utterly in love. We just have different sleep schedules, that's all:)

Answer 8

Love is an emotion...it comes and go. Love is not the only source of keeping a marriage together. It takes commitment, communication, compromise, and understanding.

What works for one couple does not necessary work for another. What's normal to one is not to another.

As long as it's something they both agree on than it's okay.

Answer 9

my hubby and I sleep in different rooms sometimes. it's got mostly to do with sleep issues,I'm a light sleeper and he snores, grunts and farts.I have to admit I have been known to be a biter in my sleep. maybe it's a safety issue LOL!! but there is no loss of love, just need a peaceful sleep sometimes.

Answer 10

Normal, after 30 years they can do as they like.