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I don't know how to just say it so...well I'm barely 20 and my husband is 24. we have now been married for 2 yrs and I feel as if I missed out on a lot. Don't get me wrong I love him dearly but I just wish things were a little different. He spends all his time working and right now I am unemployed so I am alone all day cuz he goes to work at 7am and gets out till 10-1030pm. There hasn't been any attraction in the bedroom in a while no matter what I do! No matter the sexyclothes or anything! He is really attached to his mom so on his days off his mom tags along everywhere we go. When he works she knows his break hours and the time he gets out and is either at the door of our house or on the phone calling him as he is walking in! Sometimes I feel *** if I just need to get away but I can't. I feel as if I took on 2 much reponsibility at such a young age and I need to break loose! I see my friends having fun and I feel as if I sould be there! What do I do! I love my husband but I'm confuse

2007-12-17 16:23:56 · 4 answers · asked by sugabonbon05 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

I have talked to him about all this and when he gets home I ask if he's tired and he always says no he preffers watching tv. my friends are great but they are the kind that stay out all night and probably the whole next day.

2007-12-17 16:40:27 · update #1

4 answers

there a a few things wrong here. First of all

His mother...she should not be so involved in her son's life but it is a difficult subject to address and you would need your husbands support in dealing with the situation. As far as the bedroom goes, maybe he is just tired he seems to want to be a good provider for you and works A LOT of hours.
Maybe he can work a little less and you two can go and have fun together.
You mention you took on too much responsibility at a young age but you made a decision as an adult and now you have to deal with it.
Talk to your husband about how you feel.
It would be good to know if you get along otherwise to be able to form an opinion whether or not this marriage should and could be saved,
Don't give up so easily the first few years are always hard because you are still learning who each of you are. You can either grow apart or grow together and that is up to both of you.
But def, talk to him and good luck !


well I just read your additional details It seems to me that it is either a way for him to unwind or zone out. You guys need to find something that you enjoy doing together, him zoning out in front of the tube is not heping matters much. You need to let him know that he needs to do more in this marriage than bringing home a paycheck.
As far as the bedroom goes, maybe you could leave him "naughty" notes or dirty texts or something like that...be a little trashy, maybe that will get his attention.... he may be embarrassed to tell you what he finds to be a turn on ..Communication is the key...

2007-12-17 16:46:56 · answer #1 · answered by Mark A 2 · 1 0

Getting married at such a young age will make you feel as if you are missing out on so much, and, in a way you are. However, you did get married and that is a commitment to your husband. If he's working long hours, that must mean more money coming in. I don't know why you don't work but if you don't because he doesn't want you to, find a hobby or volunteer somewhere to fill the hours. I would definitely talk to him about his mother. She needs to give you the extra time he gets and that could be part of your problem. Make sure you answer the phone and tell her he just got home and he wants to eat or shower, etc., and that he'll get back to her later. Is he a momma's boy or is she trying to make him one? You need to let him know that when you guys go somewhere you want to go alone and that maybe once in a while she could go, but not everytime. Maybe he's afraid to tell her. If you don't nip it in the bud now, it's only going to get worse.

2007-12-17 16:52:58 · answer #2 · answered by doglover 5 · 1 0

Why does he work so much? That could be the reason for the problem with sex. He is too tired and wants to sleep especially if the mother is coming over and keeping him up longer. The mother is another problem. I can see her wanting to see him but he is a grown man with a wife. I would talk to him about this. There need to be some boundaries put into place and they need to come from him. You do not have to sit at home while he is gone. Why don't you get a job or a hobby? You could also go out with your friends. Just because you are married and they are not does not mean that you have to sit at home and be bored and lonely. You can still have fun.

2007-12-17 16:37:55 · answer #3 · answered by kim h 7 · 0 0

Well the first thing is his mother needs to leave ya'll alone and he needs cut some of the times he spends with his mother. And the second....the thing about the bedroom. Some of it maybe because he works so much he is tired. That has nothing to do with you. He maybe stressed because he is the only one working right now! That could be a number of things....but you guys need to talk!!!!!! And this talk needs to be without the mother!!
Remember also that alot of your friends would like to be in your shoes married and in a stable relationship. If you love him fight for him!!!!!

2007-12-17 16:41:06 · answer #4 · answered by ~Stepa♥~ 2 · 0 0

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