my fiance and i are 18, my fiance is finishing his last year in high school. we are currently living with his parents and they keep fighting with us over really stupid stuff and its getting out of hand and my parents wont take me back, but we had a plan on getting a house with fiance's brother and gf and they agreed to paying half of everything but we just got a phone call saying that they just broke up and he's moving back in here. i don't want to be here any longer, plz get me some advise, i moved form or to pa and i feel so bad for doing it and my own family wont take me back, but i do love my fiance and i want to be with him for the rest of my life but how are we suppost to be happy when ppl keep making this very hard for us. but i can talk forever about this but just plz give some advise if you have any and plz dont be rude or nasty thanks. ?
2007-12-17 11:41:42 · 26 answers · asked by Babygiirl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First you have no business even thinking about marriage at your age.. If you aren't even out of high school, what do you think your chances are of success in marriage? You need to find a room at the YWCA or return to your parents,..What have you done that they threw you out?? I hope you haven't got any children,if not , you still have a chance to straighten this out.. Right now, you are on a collision course with disaster!! The disaster is the ruination of your life..Make an adult decision, find a place to live, and slow down and THINK!! If your boyfriend, and I don't mean "fiance" is the one, next year or the year after, he'll still be the one, only with hopefully employment and MEANS to have a place to live,and the necessities to provide for himself, and if your still in the picture, you... Stop and take a REAL look at were your at,, can you see it now?? YOUR NOWHERE!! Stop letting yourself get sucked into this impossible no outlet situation... There still is plenty of time for you and your future, YET!! SOLOMON
2007-12-17 12:04:55 · answer #1 · answered by solomon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think if you dont already have a job you need to prepare for one. Get your resume together and contact as many temp agencies as possible, and your fiance should do the same. Then you two can get your own apartment. you are an adult now, and you want to live an adult lifestyle, so why depend on his family? this may be why they are fighting with you. do all in your power to be independent and when people see you can take care of yourselves they will no longer have any bones to pick with you, because you are no longer their responsibility. Also, go on www.craigslist.com and find a person in your city that is renting out rooms in their large house for couples. Its the fastest and cheapest way to get a place where the two of you can be separated from your families and become your own family, if its what you want. if you want to take risks by becoming engaged at an early age, then do not depend on your families for a hand out. this is probably why they dont want you back, right? Get your things together, get a permanent job and move out within the next month. Good luck with your engagement.
2007-12-17 19:50:47 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ah! young love is grand. There are a few issues here. Your partner & you are young, he is trying to finish school and needs to concentrate on that. You don't say what you are doing, are you at school or working? You are learning life is full of ups & downs, you can only rely on yourself first. Your relationship may not last with your fiance, it would be wise to get some counselling and help from an organisation that deals with youth issues, they may be able to get you into accommodation for low income earners etc. Please look after yourself first and get yourself into a safe, secure environment, study and or get a good job and when your fiance has finished school and is in the workforce then you can look at moving in together if you can afford it and have a strong, mature relationship, I wish you well!
2007-12-17 20:06:30 · answer #3 · answered by MAGDA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really want to stay with your fiance then you should stick it out for a little while longer. Make some goals and dates and really stick to it. You both need to come up with a plan like getting your own place. Living with ANYBODY when your a grown adult will never work! Good luck...
2007-12-17 19:50:35 · answer #4 · answered by DW 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say what you are doing! You should get a job and so should your boyfriend (he can work after school and weekends). Then in a few months you can save enough to be on your own. For now maybe you should help around the house like clean it or fix meals so there would a lot less fighting going on.
2007-12-17 19:48:30 · answer #5 · answered by logsdodl 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well does his ex-girlfriend still live in the house?
I'm sure her offer is still open for someone to help share the rent.
And if it isn't, just move in with someone else looking for someone to share rent with.
People do that all the time, even with complete strangers.
Also consider waiting to get married until your financially secure.
Are you guys planning on going to college?
I would save up for that instead of a house.
You really will regret not going in a few years when the only job you can get is something that doesn't pay very well and you have OTHER financial issues.
Get a finance adviser to help you plan out what you should do, for whatever it is your plan on doing.
good luck =)
2007-12-17 19:46:55 · answer #6 · answered by kelso mcfly 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I know this may be hard for you, but try leaving your fiance (not like, breaking up, I mean still engaged, just.....) and buy an apartment on your own. You can still invite him over. If finances are tight, explain that your are trying to raise money to your fiance's parents, and ask them if you can stay with them a while longer. Even try explaining it to your parents. I think you should both go to college, you will regret not going in the long run. Good luck!
2007-12-17 19:46:30 · answer #7 · answered by yahoo answer-er 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
If you family loves you they will take you back.. or Maybe its not time for marriage. My wise mothers says you might not even remember him in two years..I would try and go home and just keep dating until you guys can afford to do other wise on you own ...I know this not what you would like to hear, however you are so young..take care..If he loves you he should not take you away from her family..
2007-12-17 19:54:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get your own apartment and wait till he is out of high school. Are you already graduated from high school? What about college? If you are planning on getting married so young why not just move out together and not get married. people still change when you are so young. My advice is to just wait to get married and move out of his parents house. Good luck with it all!
2007-12-17 19:50:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have to pull up the strabs on your boots and just dig in to the adult life. Get your own place. Just for you & him NO ONE ELSE. They have pay by week hotels. Some very nice with a kitchenette in them.
If you love him & he loves you ,then you need to do whatever it takes to prove to each other & the "world" that you can make it. I've seen people including myself do it.
2007-12-17 19:49:44 · answer #10 · answered by De 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋