My views of faithfulness and loyalty differ from yours, monogamy has nothing to do with either; and the only reason I haven’t been completely honest in the past is because I wanted to keep my family together and be happy at the same time. Now, as far as the unwanted pregnancy thing & std thing; the chances of that happening are slim to none if the people involved are responsible. Further more I hate that this is the focus of are issue, but if you must I will. But this isn’t the real issue(sex) for me, but obviously it is for you so we’ll continue My daughter, no we’re not going to teach our daughter that; we’re going to teach her to think for herself and make her on decisions. My heart is with my family; period. You can’t change the way I think, you probably have to open your mind(if possible) or find a partner who thinks the way you do for this to work.on what someone else might do when I make my decisions. I feel that I s/be able to be me, &if I can’t be that then I’m w/the wrong 1
2007-12-17 06:39:23 · 33 answers · asked by sassy lady 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The larger part is the email from my husband to me
2007-12-17 06:49:55 · update #1
no, you are not wrong
MO
2007-12-17 06:42:22 · answer #1 · answered by MOs fishin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok.. so you got busted, if the love is there, then the battle is halfway won. You will have to find the patience and restrain yourself from getting upset with him- He wasn't the one that cheated.. You did. Ok- enough of the guilt trip- just give it time, and when I say time. I don't mean 1 day, 1 week 1 year.. This little "fling" will take a longtime to recover from. The trust has been severely damaged. If he asks for your phone, give it to him, if he asks who you talking to.. tell him. NOW is the time to be 200% honest with him about EVERYTHING. What your oding, where you going, etc etc.. How you would You react and what would You like him to have done if the roles were reversed.. I wish you luck, trust is extremely, if not impossible to rebuild.
2016-05-24 09:17:09 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here Are Views From a Child w/ Divorced Parents:
The Bible Says never to get a divorce, but as you can see, not everyone follows :( Sometimes, You need to divorce for certain reasons. I would suggest filing for divorce for these reasons:
Physical Abuse
Cheating (Sometimes)
My parents were in the same position you are in. If I were you, I would try to get to the bottom of this before filing. If all else fails, do what you have to do.
Best Of Luck :)
2007-12-17 06:45:17 · answer #3 · answered by Brown Eyed Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not wrong. You should carefully consider what the divorce would mean for your kids as well as yourself. Remember that once a cheater, always a cheater. He may be sorry he was caught cheating but not sorry that he cheated. Somehow he has justified why he did it. I think you may like your way of life and don't want to disrupt it so you may not be willing to make a change. Think about it because your child will see how you handle your life and pattern theirs the same.
2007-12-17 06:44:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is this...his confession or yours? My views of faithfulness and loyalty differ from yours? The meaning of both is pretty clear so obviously he must believe the total opposite of what you subscribe to. Lying to keep the family together AND be happy? In other words keep home life status quo while knocking off a strange piece of tail when the mood suited?
I hope you don't consider his leaving a loss.
2007-12-17 06:56:40 · answer #5 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all I firmly believe there is a time and place for everyone to cheat, man or woman, especially under certain circumstances, so if you are not able to forgive then divorce is the only way, but, what makes you think if you meet some one else it will be different? I know one man who divorced his wife for cheating, he married another she screwed everyone in town, so unless you want to live alone for the rest of your life , think about this a long time, an old saying is " don't cut your nose off to spite your face" what about your children ? do you want them to be raised in a broken home?? they don't usually do so well.
2007-12-17 06:54:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not wrong. I would never so much as let another man touch my hand in a sexual way. I was out with my cousins for drinks at a bar and a guy came up behind me and put his hands on my waist. I kneed him in the groin. That's what you get when you miss the giant 2 karat diamond on my finger.
Anyway, my husband knows better. When we were dating, I found a text message on his phone telling another girl that she was beautiful and that any man would be lucky to have her.... I flipped out and refused to speak to him for a while. Turns out, she was a friend of his and she had just broken up with her boyfriend and he was trying to be nice to her. I refused to believe that and told him that it was the tip of the ice berg. If he was sending innappropriate text messages, then he was probably doing other things too. So, he asked me to lunch and brought the girl with him. I met her and she assured me that his story was true.
I will not tolerate someone who is physically, emotionally, or any other way unfaithful. I deserve a man who respects my body, my mind and my heart. I provide him with everything he needs, too. There is no excuse for infidelity. Ever. Period.
2007-12-17 06:51:21 · answer #7 · answered by Yup Yup Yuppers 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What a selfish egotistical SOB.
So monogamy has nothing to do with faithfulness? He's an idiot too.
Sit down Romeo and tell him he can try and place the blame for your imminent divorce on you, and not take responsibility for his own actions, however that has no bearing on the facts:
1. He cheated
2. He got caught
3. He shows no remorse, and no desire to change his behavior.
2007-12-17 06:48:26 · answer #8 · answered by patrick 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your best bet would be to leave. I mean I know that you want to keep your family together and your daughter happy. But you must think of yourself at the same time. You know what I mean. If you don't you'll just go crazy. I say if he cheated once, most likely he will again so I say leave.
2007-12-17 06:44:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not wrong.....this is absolutely not a marriage. Not only that, but your daughter WILL know that her daddy has decided to sleep around with other women.....and that will play into her future relationship--both with other men and her own father. It is NEVER ok for him to put you or your child through this.....I would be happy to leave him....happy that you can seek elsewhere and happy that your child doesn't have to live with that man for the rest of her childhood. good luck!!
2007-12-17 06:46:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i dont think think once a cheater always a cheater but it will continue to cause alot of stress in your relationship and No your not wrong for wanting a divorce, you will never look at him in the same way after this so love your kids and cut your loss
2007-12-17 06:44:50 · answer #11 · answered by Darrin_Sanchez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋