Ever stop to think she might deserve it? Ever stop to think she might have cheated, drak like a fish, and abused drugs..all this after 13 yrs of marriage. And now, after 20 yrs and thjings not much better, she wants to stay together and be a couple, have a second chance. (Has the worthless piece of trash forgotten her many other chances? Lot of nerve calling it a second chance!)
2007-12-17 05:38:02 · 28 answers · asked by lillegman46 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No, I insult her because she dis these things. I have no sympathy for people who fall apart while the rest of us keep going.
2007-12-17 05:55:58 · update #1
I know you are entitled to your feelings (and I believe they are justified) but I really hope that you don't have children you are saying these things around.
If you don't want to come across as a jerk, don't sound like a jerk. People haven't lived in your shoes, they don't know the situation. You shouldn't have to pour your heart out to strangers to justify your behavior.
Keep your opinions about the ex to yourself, and MOVE ON. SHE doesn't deserve the second change, but YOU do. Go out and live your life how you want to, and leave the loser on the way out.
Good luck to you
2007-12-17 05:42:09 · answer #1 · answered by kiki 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is a friendship and if that's gone and u can't get it back then what are you staying for. I've been married 14 yr.s and we had our ups and downs. Most important to us is friendship and trust. It should like your really unhappy and don't like her anymore instead of insulting her and giving yourself an ulcer, you might want to leave. Drugs tear people apart and you can't help them if they don't really want it, you won't change her. As far as the cheating that's a 100% deal breaker in my eyes, if my husband did then NO matter how much it hurt, and I thought I still loved him for my own good, and I deserve better I'd be gone. Best of luck, these are just my views.
2007-12-17 14:17:12 · answer #2 · answered by Calamitty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter how bad she was, insulting your wife gets you nowhere.
If you want to leave and not attempt reconciliation, then do so. But there is no reason for you to stoop to her level if that is the way she was.
However, I wonder why you didn't leave her 6 years ago, when she was really doing a lot to hurt you.
If you continue to think of her as a worthless piece of trash, all you are going to do is convince yourself that she is, and there is no chance for either you you to be happy.
2007-12-17 13:42:26 · answer #3 · answered by mj69catz 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So you feel it is your right to punish her for putting you through this for years. There's a difference between cause and effect consequences and the infliction of punishment. If all you intend to do is punish her, then I say perhaps you were wrong for staying with her because you did so for the wrong reasons. I mean, tell me honestly who in their right mind makes a conscious decision to drink like a fish and abuse drugs. She did this because she had problems and needed help. Yeah, you may have stood by and supported her, but I sense you never truly understood what she was going through. And because of this you grew to resent her and now feel the desire to punish her for what she has done to you. Sorry, but now it is you who has the problems. Try leading by example and showing your wife that burdening your partner for years is not the right way to go about dealing with personal problems. Go seek counseling and see what you can do to repair your mind and emotions after years of her abuse. See what you can do to be the partner she needs without so much resentment in your heart. If she did the wrong thing when you knew better, now is your time to shine and show her that you know better and can do the right then when it is you who needs help.
2007-12-17 14:20:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes,many times people do not know what they have until it is too late.Some things are fixable and some are not if you have tried many time and still have no resolution the only thing to do is call it quits,name calling may make you feel good in the moment but solves nothing in the end.As to your question insults do not work with drunks so it is a waste of time.I hope you find happiness if you can not forgive and forget them move on,yes that's the hardest part..Even if you do that you will still have tons of feeling to deal with,just take it one day at a time.everyone deserves to be happy.God bless you.
2007-12-17 13:48:21 · answer #5 · answered by peppersham 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok so that does make you the bad guy. Even if she did all that stuff, it makes you look worse to put her down in front of others. Just you telling all of yahoo that she is a worthless piece of trash i horrible. But you know what they say don't you? You are who you hang out with. You sound like a real prize. No wonder she wanted to cheat and get high.
2007-12-17 13:43:30 · answer #6 · answered by l'il mama 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
To be honest with you when you said I do you made the decision to take on everything that came along with it. Why not seek help for your wife instead of insulting her because that does not make you look good. People make mistakes for whatever reasons but this is the time when your wife needs you most. If your that unhappy in your marriage why are you still there???
2007-12-17 13:43:34 · answer #7 · answered by Flyyasever 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats no way to talk about your wife even if you feel shes all of the things and much more. I can see that you are really bothered by all of this so a second change wouldn't be an option. Just let her know that from your stand point you two will never be.
2007-12-17 13:41:52 · answer #8 · answered by strawberry 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Saying the truth is not an insult.
You call her a 'worthless piece of trash' etc, so i have to ask this question:
Why have you stayed with her? The thing about complaining about a partner is this: Who's dumber, the partner for being dumb or you for choosing to stay with them?
2007-12-17 14:27:54 · answer #9 · answered by FlyingScooter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Still doesn't make it ok to insult someone. Why are you still with her? Maybe you drove her to do all that. Maybe the insults have run her to the ground. 20 years of all that? You guys sound like you have LOTS of problems and may be better off not being together.
2007-12-17 13:54:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋