Should I get my Ex a Gift for Xmas?

Question

I've known my ex for three years and we have had our ups and downs, on again off again relationship. Every year during Xmas I buy her something and send it to her. We haven't talked in over a month and the last time I bought her an expensive gift and I didn't get a thank you, Merry Xmas nothing but of course she kept it. We started talking again and got back together and we recently broke up again. I feel that if I don't do something I'm a failure and if I do, I'm an idiot. What should I do?

Answer 1

No gift for her - just move on. Go find someone who would be worthy of your gift - even if not this year, then next!

Answer 2

Well I once read a book called, "It's called a break-up because it's broken" and it that book they say when you break up with someone you have to make a clean break, and not look back. If you have been trying for three years and not making any progress, I think we both know that there are problems that cannot be fixed. Unfortunately, I am in a similar situation, I have been with a man for 2 years with the same up and down problems and I keep going back, so I know what that is like. But here we are less than a week and a half til Christmas, he threw me out, like a bag of trash. I need to take my own advice and run and never look back. I think you should move on with your life and find the true happiness you deserve.

Answer 3

Giving has never been about receiving something back in return. You can give without loving but you cannot love without giving, and the mere fact you thought about it says that it fell on your heart to do so. I'm sure there are other friends for whom you have not dated that you will be giving gifts to (my guess) so why not give your ex a gift. I wouldn't say go out of your way or take out a small lone to do so. Make sure your motives are clear and be true to yourself, you are the only one who really knows if he is deserving or not. Good Luck

Answer 4

No way! You will never move on from her if you continue this type of behavior. It's kind of like you're holding on to the only thing you have left which is the tradition of sending her presents for the holidays. Last year alone, the fact she never said thank you just tells you right there how she feels and where she stands.

My best advice to you is move on and don't send her a gift. For once, let HER come to YOU. And if she doesn't, you know how she feels and where she stands....

If you feel obligated to buy something, bring it to a charity and give it to someone who WILL say thank you!

Answer 5

You still care for her obviously!

You need to ask yourself why you broke up. If you can work out your differences you need to have a talk w/ her. Maybe she feels the same way you do.

I would not buy her a gift. It sounds to me like she didn't appreciate the last gift. Just talk to her. Then atleast you can relax knowing you tried!

Good Luck!

Answer 6

Definitely get her something this year, it's the classy thing to do. It should be something she'll enjoy, but not be expensive so you don't feel taken advantage of. And by the by, don't wait for the thank you.. cuz it's probably not gonna happen. You are not a failure or an idiot in any way, but she is inconsiderate.

Answer 7

Save your money. She is an ex and only buy her something if you want to play santa other wise stop the pain and move on. Other nice women out there. When you find the right one you will feel much better!

Answer 8

If you have kids get her a gift from them, if not send her a very generic christmas card.

Answer 9

Let it go.

Why would that make you a failure?

She isn't grateful for gifts you've given her in the past, doesn't acknowledge you on holidays.

You're currently off, rather than on.

Answer 10

you are a very sweet and giving person. if the relationship is over... no gift... if there is hope for the relationship you cannot buy her anyway... give yourself a break, accept that it is over and move on.