my wife is a stay at home mom of a 12 yr old.i work 5 days a week pay all the bills & she gets $700 a month for spending money for her self i buy everything else food included.she says thats not enough for her.i come home do just about all the cooking & cleaning up after dinner. i do the grocery shopping & keep the other daily things in the house. she stays up late every nite so i go to bed alone every nite.she goes where she wants when she wants.sometimes till late at nite 1 to 2 am.is this a normal marrage & if not what should a wifes responsabiltys be for a stay at home mom??
2007-12-16 14:19:37 · 18 answers · asked by wayne 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have been a single mom for 10 years. I think it's great that she is able to do what I have so badly wanted to do. but I am afraid something isn't quite right. She should not have enough engergy to stay up that late at night after doing things around the house all day. There are no differences in stay at home moms and working moms. once a mom always a mom. Your job description as a mom does not change if you work full-time part-time or just stay home. It is still the same, cook, clean, laundry, homework...etc.....
2007-12-16 15:05:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO this is not a normal marriage by any means , she is horrible and treating you like a door mat, what kind of a mother is she also, and sorry to say but she probably is cheating on you also .... I mean she stays out till 2am , what kind of a wife/ mother does that, she also sounds like a very lazy greedy sloth , you know just divorce her she will never change, and you deserve better. A wife should cook for her family, keep a clean house and be a good wife and mother, and if she also works thats even better but a stay at home mum has no excuse for being this disgustingly lazy. I am a wife and a working mother and I manage to do evrything for my husband and daughter and we are also expecting baby in 12 weeks, so this week I wil be finishing up working but I will still cook , clean and keep the house in order, as I guess many other proper wives would do so., which also include doing th egrocery shopping etc, etc... by teh sounds of it you really picked the bad egg, move on and find someone who is going to love and treat you better and your child for that fact too....good luck!
2007-12-16 22:33:10 · answer #2 · answered by littlemisssaigon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you might be right that she's not doing enough but do you want to be right and divorced? She's a stay at home mom, she'll get primary custody and if you've been married over 10 years and she hasn't worked in all that time she'll get child support and perhaps hefty alimony - it will probably be a heck of a lot more than $700/mo. You might be lucky if you have $700/mo left over for yourself. I'd gently encourage her to meet you in the middle and compromise so you can both be happy and satisfied in the marriage, try marriage counseling and if you believe you have come to the point where you can't continue in the marriage find a father's rights attorney BEFORE you leave the marital home, document all that you do to support the household and care for your son (a daily log of dates, times and facts like "did dishes" "helped with homework 1 hour" "cleaned living room" for at least several months or more so you can show in court that if there was any imbalance in the home it was you doing the extras, and be sure to ask for joint physical custody.
2007-12-16 22:29:14 · answer #3 · answered by Jen70 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess you make quite a bit of money to allow her to be so free? People can only do to you what you allow them. I don't understand why she needs to stay at home for a 12 year old. Can she not work part time while she attends school?
Your wife does whatever she wants and you're allowing it. So, if you control the money, put a stop to her allowance. Sit her down and have a talk and let her know that you feel she's disrespecting you. It's totally not cool. How would she like that from you? She wouldn't want you gone at all hours because then she would have to do something around the house....or maybe she'd just want to hire a maid.
If you're really tired of being disrespected by someone who should respect you more than anyone, do something about it. It's time to grow a backbone.
2007-12-16 22:28:16 · answer #4 · answered by A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey you are being used. The responsibilities of a stay at home wife and mother are all the things that you are doing after you get home. You should come home to a clean house with food in the fridge and on the table. Your child is in school all day so she does not have to deal with him during the day. $700? Are you crazy? She should not be getting this much money to blow. It is way too much and she does not deserve what she is getting. She has it made and you are getting the short end. I would tell her that it is time for her to get a job.
2007-12-16 22:27:06 · answer #5 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok.. Have u talked to her about this? If not u should. She does need to go out sometimes. Although 1 and 2 am is a bit late. First talk to her, then see if u can afford a babysitter so ,sometimes u BOTH can go out and do whatever. And come home TOGETHER and sleep in the same bed. Divorce is not the only damn solution. Its just the "easiest" for quitters. Its never easy for the child. Never.
2007-12-16 22:40:05 · answer #6 · answered by caboose989 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm assuming the child is in school, which would give her plenty of time to clean and grocery shop before picking the child up from school. She must be sleeping during the day. I would suggest her getting a part time job (while the child is at school) if she isn't keeping up her end at the house, she could at least contribute financially.
2007-12-16 22:26:00 · answer #7 · answered by PhantomRN 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't sound like a stay at home mom to me...more like a permanent resident at a 5 star hotel.....Why would you put up with her behavior? I stay at home with our 1 year old...I do all the household chores, all the cooking and cleaning, pay the bills...but hubby does enjoy going to the grocery store with me...but I don't go out spending money like it grows on trees and certainly would never tell my husband "that is not enough for me"....
2007-12-16 22:26:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
she doesn't seem that interested in the domestic lifestyle.
i don't think there are any hardfast rules for being a mother... but most mothers want to take care of the home, and child, etc.
maybe she's bored with it all, depressed, or needs some stimulation (like volunteer work, hobbies or even a part time job)...?
you and your wife need to discuss this if it is troubling you.
take care
2007-12-16 22:25:01 · answer #9 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a house wife myself,I cook,clean the house while he's at work,his meals are on the table when he arrives,clean up after dinner,take out the trash,make sure his favorite clothes are clean on a daily basis,ask how is day was,all of these things,and more,not to mention I enjoy doing for my man,he takes VERY good care of me.So my out look on this is,it's his job to take care of me and mine to take care of him,marriage should always be 50/50,or there isn't one,tell her how you feel,if she won't budge,then think of taking free_ang... up on her offer!!!!!!GOOD LUCK
2007-12-16 22:35:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋