I received my Ph.D. last week. I don't plant to use the title "Dr." Why is this an issue?

Question

I earned a Ph.D. in a so-called "soft science". Outside of a college/university environment, I think addressing me as "professor" is as unnecessary as a civilian addressing a military person by their armed forced title. I wouldn't mind being addressed as "Dr.", but I prefer to be called by my first name, or "Mrs." or "Ms.". I think "Professor" is appropriate if I'm your college teacher. My mother is having a cow over this. I don't get it. I just prefer to reserve the title "Dr." for physicians. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Answer 1

Hi Ada Q,
Im studying for my M.D (instead of MBBS we have here in UK) my mother is sooooo excited that when i have graduated I'll be a "Dr" "forever".
In England where I'm from, you are only Dr. if you are a G.P (Family Physician) or as a trainee dr. Once you become a specialist registrar, you are Mr. Miss. Mrs. which i prefer. Unless you have a Ph.D or an M.D. I kind of want to be called by my first name, or Miss. blahblahblah if it has to be that way instead of Dr. i find "Dr." quite formal and intimidates patients.
I see where youre coming from, but as a Dr. (well soon to be) I think you deserve to be called Dr. also :-) I have no qualms. However, if you were a dentist, i would disagree with the title! :-P lol
At the end of the day, its your choice whatever you choose to be known by. I do agree, it looks good on your credit card "Dr. Q" but i guess your mums cow is because she's so proud of you. I would be too if i was her. Just let her call you Dr. and everyone else "ms q"
And btw, congratulations! :-)
"Dr.Love" x

Answer 2

Well I agree that the word "professor" would be the incorect title for you as you dont intend to teach. However, I have a feeling that your mother is proud of you and of your acomplishments. You see as we go back through generations, there was less and less schooling. So, to complete your degree with a Ph.D. was something to really be proud of. It was a status symbol... if you were able to afford to recieve that high of an education, it ment that you had money. That your family was well off, and that you could provide for your family. Unfortunatly in todays sociaty a BA gets you the same job that 30 years ago was obtained with a High School GED. A Masters is the same as a BA would have been 20 years ago and your Ph.D. is more afordable (although the work load is still hard) so more people have them. The title Dr. is not as important in todays sociaty as a status symbol. There for, you do not have to use it in order to refer to yourself as a highly educated person. Your mom is proud of you, and wants you to use the title that you worked so hard to earn. It may be hard for her to understand as if she went that far in shcool she would have used the title.... but todays young sociaty is a bit different. Feel free to use whatever title makes you feel comfortable. Congrats on your recent acomplishements!!!! Happy Holidays!!

Answer 3

For some people, titles are important. If you don't want to be called Dr. or Professor it should be your choice. I don't understand why you told your mother if you suspected this was important to her. I would say it's a non-issue so don't sweat it.

I'm doing a PhD and I look forward to being called Dr. I have worked so hard to get it, it seems fair. But I wouldn't think it's weird if you disagreed with me.

Answer 4

Yup. Everyone who works that hard to achieve the title wants to wear it on their sleeve. My husband has a Ph.D. in electrical engineering. At work everyone goes by first names, and that's cool with him. But if someone calls him Mr. Villareal instead of Dr. Villareal...he gets quite offended. If you want the kudos, and the $$, the Dr. title needs to be apparent.

Mrs. Villareal

Answer 5

Your mom is probably very proud of your accomplishments and wants you to highlight it. Plus, she's from a different generation. Younger people tend to not be as formal. Not everyone uses Dr. - in my university, the grad students call of the professors (except for the older ones) by their first names - and everyone is cool with it.

Do what you feel comfortable with. Your mom will get used to it.

Answer 6

May be it is all in your head.No big deal being a doctor it means you read a lot of books and not necessarily an expert.I know a lot of mediocre doctors especially in the medical field who get sued for malpractice.Personally titles do not impress me at all.Some universities hand them out as honorary titles if you got the connection.So just remember it is just a title and you need to constantly step it up.

Answer 7

It seems that your main issue is your mother's attitude. Mothers want to be proud of their children, and having them use titles is a way of doing that.

I bet the whole thing will calm down once you settle into your way of handling what you want to be called.

I had a similar issue with my European relatives. I have a J.D. (law) degree, and I would normally be addressed as "doctor" in Europe, but I don't like it because that's not the custom in the U.S. I just let them say whatever they wanted to, but I stuck with my own way when I talked.

Let your mother say whatever makes her feel good, and don't argue. At the same time, use whatever makes you feel good with everyone else. Eventually, you will be able to laugh at your mother's attempts to give you added importance.

Answer 8

It isn't an issue, and you aren't the only one who feels this way.

Are you embarrassed over earning such a high degree? Do you not want people to assume that you're some brilliant genius, and so much better than them?

I think your mother is probably very proud of you, and feels like you are 'wasting' your degree.

Answer 9

Well them tell them you would rather be called Professor. There is nothing wrong with that. You did the hard time to get your degree so why should you be mixed in a pool of Dr.'s? Setting yourself apart is so hot anyway. LOL

Answer 10

I'm with you. It's unnecessarily pretentious, unless you're in an academic or professional environment which pertains to the degree.

When I was a notary, we had a woman come in to have her signature notarized on 10 real estate documents. She signed them all with her name and Ph.D. I wanted to barf.

Instead, I signed with my name and all four of my pitiful nondoctorates: "BA, AAS, AAS, AA" :)

Rebellion, thy name is Bill