Want to use a name that my husband hates help?

Question

I have found a name for my son to be son that i love
Maximus B but this is a problem its the name of my ex that was very abusive and my husband hates this man who was also his friend ,,,,,, my husband doesnt want to use the name for this reason but i feel if i ruled out every name that had a bad history there would be none left and i just really like this name for our son do you think its wierd to use this name even though we have no connection with my ex anymore we havent speaken to him or seen him in 5 years and we live 15 hours away from him

Answer 1

"speaken" isn't a word.

If your husband hates the name, there really isn't anything you can do about it. You can't name your child Maximus if he hates it. You have to consider his feelings on the subject - remember, it's his baby, too, and he has every right as you to be involved in naming the baby the two of you created.

Answer 2

This is tricky. On the one hand, your son will probably erase any bad memories of the prior Maximus. So if it were a friend that you'd fallen out with, I'd probably say that the name is fair game.

But because it's your ex, I think there's always the lingering feeling that the name is a tribute. If there are hard feelings - and, in this case, very good reasons for those feelings - then I think the name is likely to grate.

Normally I'd agree with you, but this feels like an extreme case. I'd take Maximus off the list. Your husband's feelings are legitimate, and there must be another name out there that is less controversial.

Answer 3

I am truly sorry, but I think Maximus is an ugly name. I can see why your husband doesn't want it, your ex abused you! I'm sure that's all he can think of when that name is mentioned. He does not want to have to think about that when calling his son's name or thinking about his son. You two should sit down and each make a list of names, then go over both of them and decide on a name from there. It is all about compromising, you both need to have a say in naming your child. Good luck.

Answer 4

Why the hell would you want to use the same name for you son as your EX who was abusive to you this sounds a bit bizzare to me!!!

I don't think it is fair to your husband either how would you like it if you were having a girl and he wanted to name her after his ex girlfriend?

Besides all that what a horrible name sorry but i really don't like it at all think school play ground and your son getting called Glutious maximus or some other nasty stuff kids are cruel.

How about naming your son after someone who actually means something to you like your father or something. My son is named after my father and my husbands father. My fathers name is my son's first name and my husbands fathers name is his middle name then we threw in my husbands middle name too so my son ended up with 2 middle names.

Answer 5

Considering it's your ex's name I don't think its a good idea to use that name. You may like the name but if you named your son that then every time you said the name it would remind you of your ex and also it would remind your husband of your ex as well. I really think you should choose a different name.

Answer 6

I absolutely do not like the name Maximus. To me it sounds like you have some kind of attachment to this relationship, which may not be the case but naming your child after an ex-boyfriend could give people that idea. And to name him after an abusive ex, what do you think your son is going to think when you tell him the story? Especially if your son's daddy absolutely hated that name and the man you named him after?



Vote on my list: http://www.babynames.com/namelist/9388328

Answer 7

DO NOT USE THAT NAME!

You should never name a child after an ex-lover, especially one whom your husband knew. He'll never forget it, and you don't want him looking at your child, the beautiful baby you made together, and thinking of your ex.

The fact that your ex was abusive makes this even worse. Yes, many names will remind you of people, but this name is not a good one.

Keep your ex 5 years ad 15 hours + away from you.... do not allow his name into your family.

Answer 8

If I was your husband I would be upset and insulted too. Why on earth would you think that it was ok to name your son the same name as a man who abused you? I was in a abusive relationship an there is NO WAY I would EVER use his name or forms of it. You and your husband need to work something out and I am taking the side of your husband.

Answer 9

i would never use the name of an ex boyfriend, to name my child. u have to agree on a name. think about this, would u want to call a child u were having with ur husband after a name of a woman he dated in the past that u despised for some reason?? no i know i wouldnt. and what are you gonna say when ur kid asks u whered u come up with my name? oh it was my ex's name. maybe ur husband wants the child to be named after him. i just think that it would be so wrong to name the baby after an ex. i totaly agree with ur husband.

Answer 10

I would not use it. But my reasoning would be that at least theoretically, you love your son and you don't want to saddle him with a name that he will get tormented with the rest of his life. It is just an ugly name. On top of that, you have that is the ex's name and that your husband doesn't like it either. Three strikes, it is out.