If I give you reason and not choice will you just make the same mistake again?

Answer 1

That is more probable than not for most people.

Answer 2

If you offer reason you usually (even if inadvertantly) offer choice. By explaining why what I did was a mistake you outline a boundary of sorts. I will have the choice to cross that boundary or not.
However, if it is a really tough issue and you offer no other choices then certainly the mistake can be made again.
Its kind of like when folks come to my safety meeting and give me a list of safety issues but no solutions to the issues. Can I necessarily fix the issues without offered solutions? Possibly. But folks in the field certainly have a better understanding of some (not all but some) of these items than I do.
Now if there's a mistake being made and neither party knows the answer to resolve it...well that can be painful.

Answer 3

.I'm not sure I understand what you are asking here. Here's a simple scenario that maybe illustrates what you are talking about - that I can respond to.

Mom & Teenager in an arguement over curfew on school nites. Daughter is 15, has a 10:00 pm curfew, and A STRICT in-the-bed and lights out by 11;00 pm bedtime.

Defiant daughter snuck out and stayed out 'til 3:00 AM on a Weds. nite to go to a Rave. Got busted for City Curfew for minors, (midnight), and posession of a controlled substance, (Extascy). Spent the night in Jail until she was released to her frantic mother on probation pending a Juvinelle Court Hearing.

Daughter says that instead of just a flat 10:00 PM curfew, and an 11:00 PM bedtime she's old enough to have some other options; like on school nites:

1. Have friends over until 11:00 pm.
2. Be able to stay up til midnight and talk on phone or be on computer with friends.
3. Have a few beers if Mom is home.
4. Smoke in her room.
5. Have the "V" chip taken off the TV and the parental block removed from her computer.

Mom's Counter offer:

1. For sneaking out & going to the Rave, and being found with EX, and maybe using ex, (they are waiting for the blood & urine tests t comeback), (and scaring me to death), you are grounded for 3 months, that includes no phone, and no computer.

2. About your other 5 proposals. Numbers 1 & 2 are no go's. - we will talk about them when you are 17. Number 3 is OK when you are of legal drinking age. Number 4 is Not ever happening in My house. And finally number 5, let's talk about that. Which specific programing do you want access to? You name it, we can view it together, and if I feel that it's not pornographic, too violent, or mature themed then we will see if we can "Un-block" that specific program. But I am not going to pay for another $ 3,000.00 in computer charges to "adult" sites just because you were curious, and could'nt control your self, and wanted to do some on-lne shopping.

I'm learning from the past - and you need to too, - or the past is going to repeat it self, and you are going to pay for your mistakes over and over again. Sometimes you just have to accept a reason or a directive, and there is no time or reason for disgussion or other choices.

It's like if you are in deep trouble and you come to me for help, and I tell you that if you really want me to help you - that you must do as I say immediately and without question, no discussion. You don't think, you just sweat, breathe, and do as you are told. Could you do that? Most people say yes, but most people can't. Well best opf luck.

Answer 4

I never make the same mistake twice! But I do make thousands of new ones!!!

Answer 5

Of course... I always make the same mistake over and over again... even conditioning doesn't help me. haha... i am hopeless... lol im like a little kid and a hot stove...

Answer 6

it depends. Was the mistake fun last time? If so, yup, same deal.

Answer 7

no i usually learn the first time around

Answer 8

of course

Answer 9

i never mess up twice