Will I be lonely when I get older if I never have children?

Question

I am a young gay may (25 years old) in a committed relationship. I would love to have raise children and start a family - it just seems like having a great family is something that really makes life fulfilling, especially once you start getting older. But I'm in a dilemma because, being gay, it's really hard to procreate. Finding a surrogate mother is expensive!! I guess adopting would be fine too, although I would like to have my children have my own genes if possible - but maybe that doesn't matter so much, maybe adopting is the best idea. What do you think? Thanks!

Answer 1

I feel the same way, I'm a straight female but I honestly think my life won't be complete until I have children. Some people aren't like that, more power to them! But some people have strong instincts.

I say definitely look into adoption. I'm a huge fan of adoption, it is one of the best things a person can do. There's nothing more noble than giving a child a loving home.

Surrogates are fine, but a baby having your genes isn't the most important thing. The love is. I say save the money you might have used on that and adopt and give that child the world!

These are just my opinions, and good luck!

Answer 2

I don't think you need to fear your situation.

When we begin to age, we usually find other things to fulfill our lives such as activities to engage in that interest us and fulfill our companionship needs.

Also, you must remember that straight couples and heterosexual people who have children also fear being lonely because their children grow up, move away to college, get married, and find mates to bond with. As a result, most parents don't see their children as much but they still get by.

I also do not have kids but as a single straight male, I do not feel too lonely because I have other activities to occupy my time, even though I admit that I sometimes wonder what it would be like to have kids. I also realize that God has a plan for me and that everyone's situation is uniquely different.

Regardless, try not to worrry about tomorrow and live your life for today. These things have a way of working themselves out without you putting too much energy into worrrying. Our purpose is to plan as best we can and live for today, but we must not get burdened by worrying about things that we have no control of changing.

This only prevents us from living productive lives today and being the best company to others by focusing on them and not being too preoccupied with the challenging things of life.

Hang in there and don't forget to remind yourself that you're contribution to life is just as important as any potential kids that you may or may not have.

Answer 3

We have to be truthful to ourself. How do you suppose to tell your children that his / her father is a man, and that his/her mother is also a man ? Would that make sense? Try to be the real you and start a normal family does help you out.