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Here I am on another wasted Saturday.
Looking at old pictures,
remembering old words and listening to old songs.
The feelings come back,
the years unfold like a book closing from the front
and there you are smiling
and there I am smiling.
We were perfect frozen in time.
I stand up because my back is stiff
I return to the attic
I stand submerged with my past below me;
and if you move too fast you will obscure it
but if you slow down and wait it becomes still
and you can see the reflection.
It’s beautiful and sad like a sonata,
four seasons playing over and over and over
always the same changes
yet you see yourself change
not in the same repetition
but in a kind of a spasmodic pattern
and the weather of our own lives
change our characteristics
the girls,
the boys,
the friends,
the weddings,
the honeymoons,
the struggles,
the deaths,
the sunny days,
the rainy days,
the days you hope would last forever
the days that you watched clocks waiting for the sun to set.
All contribute to one masterpiece,
to one construction,
to one complex work of art:

You.

2007-12-15 11:13:11 · 3 answers · asked by Jonny 2 in Arts & Humanities Poetry

3 answers

It reads like a one-man play. very well done, I enjoyed reading it.

2007-12-19 09:33:45 · answer #1 · answered by Dondi 7 · 0 0

And you, too. And your poem, which is also a work of art. The nostalgia is tangible and touches the reader with joy and sadness at the same time. The reader feels the stiffness of the poet, sees the slow and painful walk back up to the attic, smells the slightly moldy odor of the old prints and imagines the sunny, rainy and joyful days and compares them to the emptiness and loneliness of the attic. Congratulations on a successful and touching poem.

2007-12-15 19:20:44 · answer #2 · answered by Elaine P...is for Poetry 7 · 0 0

I thought I was alone but seems in good company. The speaker is a loser like myself Lol! (see my profile).

Well, a nice poem generally but could you make it more tight and succinct by reducing repetitions!!
Otherwise, It speaks to personally quite well.
Good luck to you.

.

2007-12-16 10:10:11 · answer #3 · answered by ari-pup 7 · 0 0

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